Big hug for you ilike and Welcome..... I'm so sorry you have gone through such a rough time for so long
We start to believe these things and that's the worst of it.... It's wonderful that you're presently seeing a therapist.... You wrote out what you wanted to say really well on here..... If you have trouble saying it to your therapist perhaps you can write it and print it out for a while
I'm also really glad that your dad now has a diagnosis and is getting the help that he needs..... Another hug and a blessing.....xo

I don't know what a diagnosis would be for you however some of what you've described could be complex PTSD due to the prolonged emotional suffering .... Therapy can help this a great deal...... There are other tools that can help as well......xo

Complex Trauma/Childhood Abuse

Complex trauma refers to repeated interpersonal trauma, often occurring in childhood. This type of trauma includes sexual and physical abuse as well as emotional abuse and neglect. Emotional abuse can include verbal attacks, incidents of humiliating or threatening behaviour, and witnessing violence against loved ones; whereas, emotional neglect involves a failure to provide a child’s basic emotional needs, such as love, attention, understanding, affection, support, and protection.

Exposure to such experiences of abuse and neglect can be particularly damaging because they are usually chronic, occur during developmentally vulnerable periods of life (i.e., during critical periods of brain development and personality formation), and involve harm and/or betrayal within relationships that are supposed to be trustworthy, nurturing, and protective. As a result, these experiences compromise normal self-development and basic trust in primary relationships.

In addition to being at higher risk for developing PTSD, individuals who have suffered complex trauma are also at higher risk for other anxiety disorders, depression, low self-esteem, substance use problems, and impulsive and self-destructive behaviours. Complex trauma can profoundly affect fundamental aspects of oneself and one’s ability to relate to others, resulting in problems in the areas of:

Emotion
Emotion regulation difficulties such as too much or too little emotion, limited awareness of feelings, difficulty with self-soothing
Chronic feelings of fear, anger, shame, sadness, helplessness, hopelessness
Impulsive or self-destructive behaviours related to difficulties managing emotions (addictions, self-harm, disordered eating)
Mind/Self-Concept
Sense of self as bad, inadequate, weak, powerless, worthless, undeserving
Self-critical and self-blaming; hypersensitivity to criticism & rejection
Identity problems (e.g., not feeling whole, lacking a clear, stable sense of self, inner sense of confusion, frequent changes in career, life goals, etc.)
Alterations in attention and memory (e.g., dissociation, difficulty focusing)
Relationships
Problems with trust and intimacy in relationships (e.g., jealousy, difficulties committing to relationships, difficulty being vulnerable)
Difficulties with self-assertion and setting limits in relationships
Sense of isolation and alienation (e.g., difficulties connecting to others)
Body
Frequent physical health problems (e.g., chronic pain, irritable bowel syndrome, headaches, hypertension, sexual pain and dysfunction)
Hypersensitivity to physical contact, sounds, and other stimuli
Sleep problems
Emotion Focused Therapy for Trauma (EFTT) is an effective treatment for complex trauma related to childhood abuse or neglect. Read more about treatment.


Treatments for PTSD and Complex Trauma

Avoidance of trauma-related memories, feelings, thoughts, and situations is a natural response to painful experiences. However, avoidance can prevent processing and integration of the trauma and ultimately perpetuates symptoms and interferes with natural recovery. Chronic avoidance also leaves people stuck in the feelings and perceptions formed at the time of the trauma.

In order to heal from trauma, people need to remember, to tell the story over again in a safe and validating environment in order to work it through and begin the healing process. Talking through the trauma helps individuals get ‘unstuck’, gain more control of their thoughts and feelings about the trauma, make sense of it, and integrate it into their experience so that it does not continue to haunt them. This process of integration allows the trauma to become a part of normal memory rather than something to be perpetually feared and avoided, interfering with normal life. Revisiting the traumatic event(s) is hard at first, but many feel better over time and notice reduced symptoms as well as feeling more empowered, more connected to themselves and others, and regaining a sense of meaning in life.

There are several effective treatments for PTSD and complex trauma. These therapies all teach skills to manage anxiety and other intense emotions. They also involve working directly with trauma memories and feelings to process them, and helping individuals make sense of the trauma. However, therapy for complex trauma is typically longer and the therapeutic relationship plays a more central and direct role in the treatment. Additionally, more time is spent addressing emotion regulation (e.g., awareness, tolerance, managing intensity of emotions, coping), relational problems (e.g., learning how to effectively communicate feelings and needs, setting healthy limits) and self-related problems (e.g., self-criticism, self-blame).


Prolonged Exposure

Prolonged Exposure is a type of cognitive behaviour therapy for PTSD that helps people approach trauma-related thoughts, feelings, and situations that they have been avoiding due to fear. Repeated retelling and visualizing of the traumatic event (called imaginal exposure) helps to process the trauma leading to reduced posttraumatic symptoms as well as reduced fear of trauma-related memories and emotions. Individuals are also helped to confront safe but avoided situations in the real world. Repeated exposure to these thoughts, feelings, and situations helps reduce the power they have to cause distress.


Cognitive Processing Therapy

Cognitive Processing Therapy focuses on the meaning given to the traumatic event(s) and problematic beliefs about the trauma that interfere with recovery, called “stuck points”. In revisiting the trauma memory, individuals are helped to understand how their interpretations of the event contribute to persisting negative emotions such as fear, guilt, shame, and anger; skills are taught to challenge and change problematic beliefs. In particular, therapy attends to areas of safety, trust, power, control, esteem, and intimacy which may have been disrupted by the trauma. Cognitive Processing Therapy has shown effectiveness for PTSD and complex trauma.


Emotion Focused Therapy for Trauma

Emotion Focused Therapy for Trauma (EFTT) is an effective treatment for complex trauma that was specifically developed for individuals who have experienced different types of childhood abuse (emotional, physical, sexual abuse, emotional neglect). In addition to addressing symptoms of distress and problems in functioning associated with this type of complex trauma, this approach focuses on resolving issues with past perpetrators of abuse and neglect, usually attachment figures (e.g., parent) and healing these specific emotional injuries. There is also a focus on modifying maladaptive trauma-related emotions such as fear and shame and an emphasis on helping individuals draw on inner strengths and access adaptive emotions as healthy resources.

Please contact us to find out more about treatments for trauma and abuse.

Thank you for all the information. I do think I have cptsd, not only from this, but because of a few other things. I was sexually abused and raped when I was much younger, my mom had cancer, a friend died, and last year I was sexually assaulted. After all that has happened, it's certainly hard to do some things. Thank you again for all the information. I will look back at it again in the future.

Big hug for you sweetie..... The last line of the info I shared is from the site I got the info from re contacting us.... It's not from me

There is a very active PTSD board on here...... There's also a Healthy Relationships board that's not as active but good......xo

This is a link to the PTSD board on here..... I have CPTSD as well....... a lot of people on the PTSD board have complex trauma actually

https://www.dailystrength.org/group/post-traumatic-stress-disorder-ptsd

WOW! Things I get upset about. 1. On that list. SOMEONE WHO HAS A WORSE LIFE THAN MINE! THAT IS YOU!