I am always amazed at how being brutally trampled by the criminal justice system affects people, even in subtle ways. Whether it is a false conviction or just having a loved one mistreated by the justice system and then placed on the registry for life for a nonviolent crime, the effect is the same.

I have had my own horrendous experiences with the prison system and the justice system, but I am mostly referring to the ladies on the board who have husbands, sons, and boyfriends who have been give very long sentences to be followed by a lifetime registration requirement.

Now to punish someone in a fair manner make the punishment fit the crime is one thing, but to give someone twenty years for looking at a naughty picture is entirely different. To watch someone closely who has been released from prison is one thing, but to place them on a "hit list" with so many rules that they are no longer able to function in society is another.

And to punish the perpetrator is one thing, but to punish his wife or little Suzy or little Billy for something their father may or may not have done should be criminal.

What actually happens when a family member or an innocent man is made to endure all these humiliating and degrading laws and restrictions?

It causes us to lose our INNOCENCE. We find out everything we were taught as a child---that policeman are our friends, that the justice system is fair, and that only bad guys ever get convicted of a felony and only really bad guys are sent to prison---was a lie. Everything we were taught growing up crashes down on us and the effect is like throwing cold water on a barking dog.

My father was recently in ICU. As I went in his room, I noticed either a policeman or a hospital security officer talking to a nurse. I KNEW he was not talking about me or a threat to me----hell, I did not even know if he was a real cop. BUT he still made me nervous and I never let him out of my sight. My mind knew he was just hanging around, but my subconscious would not allow me to ignore him.

When the ambulance came to get my father, of course, I was very concerned. I loved my dad, but I was also concerned about something much more sinister. The thought that the authorities might somehow try to say I abused or neglected him or in some way contributed to his death was in the back of my mind. I know, I know, that was downright stupid, but this is what these things do to a person.

I imagine all the ladies here---and guys too----have had their baptism into reality by being involved in this situation with a loved one in prison or on the registry. I can think of several ladies here that I talk to who have sons who have been given absolutely ridiculous----life changing--- sentences for looking at child porn.

You lose your innocence. It is almost like a small child that plays with what he thinks is a friendly dog. When the dog bites, the child's innocence is lost.
He is no longer a child. Reality sits in.

We have all been bitten by "the dog" so to speak. Sometimes we become so cynical that we expect the worst from every situation in life. At times the stress is unbearable.

This is why it is so important to have a SUPPORT forum as we have here. I feel a kinship with each and every person here and there is a common bond that links all together. There is strength in numbers and I am sure everyone here feels comfort by reading others' posts.

There is not a person here who is not hurting or has been hurt because of some of these ridiculous laws.

Just remember----we are all allies. We need to stick together.

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