From what I have heard from others that are in treatment here in WI, which could be vastly different than other areas of the country, that anything less than admission and acceptance of the fact that you are a deviant person with deviant thoughts that has committed a crime is considered avoiding the issue, minimizing the impact that they have on their victims and others.

I do not think that it is right, nor do I think that it is therapeutic, but it is what a lot of sex offender treatment providers look for in their groups and counseling sessions. I know it's hard, but when going into sex offender treatment one has to 'walk the walk and talk the talk', even if they are completely innocent. My husband who never committed a crime but because of a vindictive cousin was forced to take a plea, he succeeded in treatment, it is about playing the game.

I know your son is young but it is time for him to learn, that "playing the game" is part of life and usually ever facet of it to survive and succeed in today's world. It won't be easy, it won't be pleasant, but he needs to learn that the only person that matters what they think is him, the rest is just show for those that need the performance.

It is the unfortunate consequences of taking a plea, always sucks... never easy...

Ugh, Wis, that is horrible.

It's sad anyone would have to lie.

And it's sad it's come to that.

I admitted to having the tape. Heck, I handed it over to them when they came knocking.

But to admit to liking kids sexually just to look reformed? That's sick.

I am sorry for sounding so dismal... I just remember all the things I worried about when my husband was going through it. What was going to happen. what he was going to say when we knew his innocence. He stuck to the complaint and the exact things he was convicted and plead to. Because he plead that is just that... Guilty... Even if you know beyond a shadow of a doubt that he didn't do anything wrong.

There are situations in life that you have to learn to bite your tongue, say things you don't believe or are untrue to save your's or someone else's butt. This is one of those times, he will survive this... Yeah the PTSD is something that all prisoners come away from prison with, my husband has it, it sucks.

You hang in there, tell your son that things are only going to get better with time... and that he will survive this... Hugs!

If you don't admit, then you don't complete treatment successfully. and they can try to keep you in treatment the entire time you are on supervision. My husband was lucky, he was able to complete it in prison so it reduced his risk level on the outside. Passed his polygraph and is now deemed low risk...

I look at it like things that pertain to your employer. You don't have to love them, you don't have to like them, you do have to do what they ask, and you can go home at the end of the day. The same applies to this... eventually the treatment will be over, the telling them what they want to hear, it is all about what life is going to present to everyone over time...

Yes IvyDog. Just possessing the cp is a crime. But it seemed like you thought my son was curious about watching it which he wasn't.
It's also a crime if you download it and not tell the police. Either way you're screwed.

I have nothing against someone who is 'curious' , but that was not my son's case. He literally saw 2 seconds of it and deleted it. Had he been curious he would have watched more.

No, A trial never works.

The police does not have to prove you watched it. Just having it is a sign of guilt. They thought all the 2331 music videos were 'suspect' cp. and so they thought they had a big guy in the biz and found out they only had my son. But the prosecuted anyway.

There is software, like the peer-to-peer stuff used all over the internet. They put in a zip code and look thru all the computers in that zip code who are using P2P. They find 1 little snippet of a cp that they have in their vast collection of child porn and bingo.. you're a sex offender.

Hopeful he won't have to take treatment.. Waiting on word back from our lawyers about that. But if he has to, we have a shrink and I like his attitude. My son says he will tell the truth or say nothing. He won't admit to something he didn't do. Not anymore.

Nope, it was an example. I wasn't accusing your son.

I hope you're able to avoid it so he doesn't have to be put in another horrible position.

Nako - Is the treatment a part of being an SO in PA? Is that why they are saying he has to? In Florida it is a part of SO probation - everyone has to do it and it has nothing to do with whether someone has a problem or not. The majority of young mean in there have already been cleared of having deviant tendencies sexually - so it is not about that or admitting anything.

So like in my son's case - he admitted to looking for teenage girls and having the pics. 2 psychologists and the group person have said he does not have a problem. The one thing my son has gotten from the treatment is that they teach them why what they encountered is wrong - for instance my son never thought about how those girls get in those pics - also they want accountability. for instance when they gave my son the polys (another one - hopefully the last one) they ask him over and over about the images and were they really teenagers (they know they were because it was in his case but they want to see what he says and whether he tells the truth)

I guess what I am trying to say is that at least in Florida the treatment is not about whether you broke the law on purpose etc. it is about the treatment being part of the probation conditions. I know that my son has actually benefited in a positive way (he has a great group guy) personally - not because of the SO stuff but the life lessons and how to handle depression etc. I would say if he has to go he should just answer the questions truthfully and make the most of the situation. In FL the SO has to pay for the treatment - group is 24 a week and one on one is 100 a month

Unfortunately also (at least in Florida) I have found that sometimes the judges say things and it can even be the final judgement but then you find out that the judge had no right to say that. There was a young man in Florida that the judge ut in his papers that he could stay living at his parents house which was not a eligible address - once the media got wind of it and the neighbors he had to leave and go to court etc. Not sure what the outcome was of that case.

The Federal Judge in Florida said my son was to take Mental health therapy and specifically said he was NOT to take SO treatment. It says right there in his release papers

Yeah I have found that many times that does not matter

My son accidentally downloaded something. He doesn't need to be taught how to not look at underaged girls.
I don't see my son benefiting in any way. If they left him alone so he could feel like a normal person .. that would benefit him. Not reminding him every week that he's an RSO. How does that benefit? It doesn't. It just brings him down to a level of subhuman. And that's what it's about.
'treatment' is about making someone feel like they have a problem.

My husband went to group therapy. They never discussed his individual case (at least not in the group outside of jail) They spoke in generalities when they spoke at all about SO specific things. They often talked about factors in their lives, like finding jobs etc.
My husband actually enjoyed it too, 'cept when the talked about the SO stuff which was rarely.
His councilor came up to him one day, and told him that he could not go into details, but he felt father to father, that my hubby should know that the guy who actually did molest his daughter would be starting therapy and that my hubby should not go to the early morning one. cos he (the councilor) had set the guy up for that session.
We both got the impression that he KNEW my hubby is innocent.

Nak, I am sorry, but he plead guilty to a crime, doesn't matter if he did it or not. The plea alone is all the 'proof' that is needed for them to demand him to attend treatment. It will not matter what you believe is right. My husband made the mistake of being nice and understanding to a young teenage cousin that was dying for attention from her viciously divorcing parents. She did this by accusing him of molesting her and one of her friends. Her friend denies it and has stated that she is lying outright to garner attention. Still the charges came, the court came, and ultimately the plea came. Since there was no 'evidence' of any kind other that the girl's 'word' it really didn't matter, he was already guilty in the eyes of the legal system.

I know what it is like to be railroaded, I have also learned how to navigate this system to help minimize the impact on our lives.

So my husband made the mistake of being nice to a family member and it has cost him his career and his self-worth. It will keep him on the registry for life and it will keep him from voting for another 9 years. I can tell you we do not talk to anyone from that side of his family at all. I don't expect this to change.

I felt the same way about Rich going to treatment, how was he going to get through it, what was he going to say when they wanted him to talk about a crime that never happened? He some how worked it out, he stuck to the facts, just like you have advised him to do. He was downloading videos and this one came in by accident. While he is guilty of downloading and possessing the material, he isn't guilty of enjoying it or getting pleasure from it. In fact it might be prudent for him to talk about what he felt like when he opened it and subsequently closed it with the counselor.

The one thing you might want to watch out for is how much the treatment provider talks to the PO. They shouldn't be able to tell the PO anything with out a waiver that was signed by him to share information, he would have gotten that from his PO or from the Treatment provider. Did you get copies of all the paperwork that he signed that first day?

My son does not have a problem either. And he did not have to be taught not to look at underage girls