My PO was a dick to me before I got all my ducks in a row. By that I mean passing poly's, completed treatment, have a job, no contact with police or minors, and was going to college for a long term plan to be successful. Once I did that, my PO was about the nicest person I had met, but until then, big dick. When I lost jobs because of bring a SO, my PO became a dick again until I got another job. The PO even came to my house one morning at 7am and said why wasn't I out pounding the pavement looking for another job.

Since nak's son has a job and a place to live and completed the therapy he was mandated to do, I assume the PO is being crazy because of the legal challenges. That's a very good question though daisy.

Oooo...Sam66! I like your technique. I'm probably at least five years away from having to deal with a PO for either of my sons. However, this technique could come in handy for many uses, between now and then.

What states are people in? Just curious as I hear good and bad scattered throughout and trying to see if the north east really is more liberal when it comes to this stuff.

@Independent ,if you don't mind me asking what were some of the poly questions?

My suggestion is to talk to the PO as if you were in a very important job interview. The PO is not your friend. The PO does not have time for chit-chat. Stick to the subject, and say nothing else.

Again - the PO is not your friend.

Thought I would share a funny PO story - when my son was on probation there was a PO (not his regular one thank goodness) whose name I will not post - for now will call him Am. Well Am had a terrible reputation among the probationers for being VERY tough and an A-hole all around. Well, one particular weekend he was the probation officer on call and my son's GPS was malfunctioning (not a rare occurrence - they all time gave false readings etc.) and AM called him and exploded about why wasn't he home during curfew and he was going to violate him etc.... scared my son half to death and made him go outside in the middle of the night and walk around the yard to catch the satellite signal etc.... so a few hours later when my son was up taking a shower to go to work his phone rang - so he pulled aside the shower curtain and saw that it was this Am calling him again so he stepped out and answered right away - it was Am all right but he had did return dialing on his phone and meant to call someone else (not a probationer for sure lol) and said "Hi honey kins" or some such nonsense! lol My son was like Officer Am this is ______. He was like I knew that and you better be careful boy and hung up! LOL

@frog Was very nervous for the poly, and it's been sometime ago, but they asked me what I think is a control questions like had I broken any laws. Then asked if I had looked at porn, had contact with minors, sexually touched any minors, if I had done drugs.

*Poly's should be plural

As usual, my comment will be unpopular but hear me out.

I've been there, I survived probation and 10 yrs on the registry with very few problems. WHY? Because I played the game, that's it, if the PO said "Jump"? I put on 'Van Halen' and 'Jumped'.. Some of you have known me awhile and know I rarely back down, but I know when to make a strategic withdrawl.

Nak.
As much as you don't like it, as far as your son is concerned, his PO is GOD. If the PO wants your son violated, he will violate him, right/wrong, fair/unfair, that's just the way it is and there is nothing you or he can do about it.
Nak, You are a strong woman and believe me, i know you want to protect your son, mine would be 31 next month, this Jan. it will be 10 yrs that he rolled his truck on the way home from work, but maybe, I don't know your son, it's time to let him step up and be a man, he made it through almost 3 yrs in prison, he IS a man. HE needs to learn to deal with his PO. I know that you have the legal right to 'sic' lawyers on them but all it's going to do is just 'Piss him off' and you're not the one who's going to pay the price, your son is.
I'm not trying to piss you off, I've been through it. You might say "I'm not going to play their game", and a game it is, a very SERIOUS game where your son's freedom is a stake.

Wow that's two things we agree upon coastie, we're on a roll.

The problem with POs is they have so much unchecked authority to do basically whatever they want. When someone has that much power to make your life miserable it's wise most of the time to show them almost excessive deference.

I know I'm nieve, but what's wrong with the family (if they can afford it) having a lawyer on retainer to double check some of this nonsense that these PO' s come up with? Our family members have been thru enough w/o some power hungry officer making rules up as they go.

Nak, You are a strong woman and believe me, i know you want to protect your son, mine would be 31 next month, this Jan. it will be 10 yrs that he rolled his truck on the way home from work, but maybe, I don't know your son, it's time to let him step up and be a man, he made it through almost 3 yrs in prison, he IS a man. HE needs to learn to deal with his PO. I know that you have the legal right to 'sic' lawyers on them but all it's going to do is just 'Piss him off' and you're not the one who's going to pay the price, your son is._


Your post is ridiculous. You just pull a bunch of bull out of your ass. . Nak

Wow, love you too....Go ahead and piss off his PO, you'll be visiting him back in prison. Sad, but you get your wish, I won't waste anymore time on you, you're not worth it and your post to me shows what kind of person you really are, a bitch.
I hope your kid gets away from you because YOU are going to get him locked up.
I hope HIS life gets better, as for you, I don't care...'Bye..

My son needs to start being a man? WTF? Who are you to say that.