Families of SOs Community Group
WE HAVE MOVED!!! ............................. ............................... ......................... ............................ ............................. .......................... HERE: http://support-for-families.boards.net ............. ................ ............... ................ ............................... .................Please create a profile...
how does one go into prison with a sex offender status? of course i was fearful for my sons safety, some have said that you go in with a cover story, and hope for the best, well this did not work out at all for a young man in the prison my son is at.
after being in federal minimum for three days, my son decided it best to own up to his charges, knowing that he would not be able to differ the questioning about his charges, he chose to just get it over with and take whatever they were going to dish out (which turned out to be non-exsitant). he said that when he got inside, he noticed that there were groups of mexicans, mexican americans, blacks, and native americans but the whites seemed to be scattered into small factions. he somehow made connection with the native americans and was invited to cell with them, and he was left alone by the others.
not long after, this kid around my sons age was admitted. he got in with the whites, telling them he was in on bank robbery. well, the whites found out otherwise and beat the kid to a pulp...then told him -he has to beat up another s.o. to get himself into shu, if he knew what was good for him-.
i am sure he looked around and thinking my son was the easiest target he went over to him and started attacking him. from what i am gathering, it was not affective in actually hurting my boy, however my son handled it, it did not land him in shu as well, thank goodness, but this could have turned out so much worse than it did.
a valueble lesson, i think. watch out for the newbs that think they can play these guys, no one likes being made a fool of.
after being in federal minimum for three days, my son decided it best to own up to his charges, knowing that he would not be able to differ the questioning about his charges, he chose to just get it over with and take whatever they were going to dish out (which turned out to be non-exsitant). he said that when he got inside, he noticed that there were groups of mexicans, mexican americans, blacks, and native americans but the whites seemed to be scattered into small factions. he somehow made connection with the native americans and was invited to cell with them, and he was left alone by the others.
not long after, this kid around my sons age was admitted. he got in with the whites, telling them he was in on bank robbery. well, the whites found out otherwise and beat the kid to a pulp...then told him -he has to beat up another s.o. to get himself into shu, if he knew what was good for him-.
i am sure he looked around and thinking my son was the easiest target he went over to him and started attacking him. from what i am gathering, it was not affective in actually hurting my boy, however my son handled it, it did not land him in shu as well, thank goodness, but this could have turned out so much worse than it did.
a valueble lesson, i think. watch out for the newbs that think they can play these guys, no one likes being made a fool of.
I never shared my crime with any one in prison or out and I believe from what I saw that rewdiazepam is 100% right if imates get to know you, this is much better. Its the same here on the street, people who hear of my crime or those I tell dont want any thing to do with me, but my friends know me and are alittle more understanding.
My husband was never in a fight either and never had to get in one in prison either, at least not to my knowledge.
In WI there is Truth-in-Sentencing, so it breeds two attitudes. One is that they have nothing to lose since there is no such thing as getting out on good behavior. The other is they just want to get and out making as little waves as possible and surviving it. Both are pretty easy to spot.
I worried a lot when my hubby first went in... I found out that while he was scared/nervous at first, he learned pretty quick the lay of the land in there. You may find yourself proud of him on how he handles it.
Sex offenders do OK in prison if they have figured out how to be accepted and liked by the other inmates. Just being a sex offender in prison is not usually enough to get a person hurt.
But it is the sex offenders that do not act normal or act "weird" that really get the hammer put down on them. The other inmates think you are weird anyway and they use the sex offender status to beat the hell out of you. So it is not just being a sex offender by itself that causes a problem.
I never had a problem in prison and was at a medium for 26 months. I did get into some arguments from time to time but never into a fight. I minded my own business and most of the inmates liked me. I certainly never had any problem because of my sex offender status.
Staying safe in prison has nothing to do with how big a person is or how much weight he can lift or how tough he is.
The key to prison is to, early on, figure out how other inmates think. An intelligent person cannot outmuscle other inmates, but he can certainly outsmart them. A person has to watch and observe other inmates, to learn what is and is not acceptable according to the "inmate code." He has to learn what really pisses off other inmates and what makes them see other inmates as "OK" or "All Right" type of guys. Once a person has done all this by using his brain and not his muscle, he will do fine in prison no matter what his crimes are. Guys that are considered OK or All Right by the other inmates never have any problems.
You have to use commons sense. You cannot go into prison and be arrogant, or cocky or too nosey. There are just certain behaviors that other inmates do not like and will put a person on their shit list.
For every guy that gets carted off to the hospital, a hundred guys do fine. The people that get hurt are usually the ones that just do really dumb ass things.
The problem is that most sex offenders DO act sort of strange in prison. Maybe it is fear, or maybe it is just their personality, but other inmates pick up on this pretty quick.
Just be a normal guy and use common sense. Then you will probably be OK.
rewdiazepam
personally when I was in if someone wanted to do anything like that with me I stood my ground. frankly, after a while you get the attitude of "dont fuck with me" in jail.
the term I used to say is "we are all in red" in reference to the clothes we all wore.
2corin seeing that your from my area make sure your bother requests Oshkosh Correction Institution, and tell him to get into the servery for a job. so many opportunities in that job field. yes, the pay grade sucks (22 cents/ hr), but you have access to extra food, which is very important in prison. you have the ability now to sell leftover mainly deserts, or use it as a manipulative tool. it is very important to have a level of power in prison, and it's respect and reputation. not only that but oshkosh has plenty of college opportunities. he'll probably go to greenbay first (max prison), but after awhile he'll get to OCI. after he establishes some sort of reputation and respect tell him to get into badger state industry (laundry) 3rd shift, where he'll make 1 dollar per hour. which is a lot of money in prison. it means he'll make 80 dollars per week and last i remember (2006) you can only spend 72 dollars per every 2 weeks on canteen. i ran a store while in prison (2 for 1) so after about 3 months i really didn't have to go to the canteen. lol. like i've said i still have some connections to people in OCI, and if you like i'll notify them too help out. good luck.
Definitely listen to what former inmates have said, because no one can determine the way things really are, except a former inmate.
To say I had concerns for my son's physical well-being is an understatement.
My son is small for his age ( he was 26 when first arrested--he is 5'7, around 140lbs, blue eyes and red hair....and the super fair skin that goes with that red hair..) Anyway, the one thing my son does have is intelligence ( except when it came to doing what he did....d/loading under age porn)..Anyway, he soon realized his best bet was to stay low, don't snitch, don't volunteer for anything...and keep sharp eyes on the ones he talks to....eventually, he could tell a few of his true crime....but in the beginning it was more like half-truths...(i.e.- vindictive ex, girl who looked,acted like 21 but was 17, ect..)
And rew is totally onpoint when he states that minimum and medium are like night & day.
I hope & pray your loved ones get put in a minimum, especially if it is a non-contact charge, and its their first time of being in serious trouble. Some say its because of their long sentences and type of crime, they get medium facillities...but, I know there are more factors that determine their placement.
Good Luck and keep us informed....wishing u all the best...
Jim from Jax
Did you ever hit the nail on the head!!! This is exactly what I have been preaching to guys going to prison for sex crimes since I was released several years ago.
Stay low, until you make some friends; then you can gradually let the truth out if you want, and they will no longer make a big issue of your crime---because you have already made some friends and gained some respect and the other inmates know you are not a snitch.
And it would do well to listen to former inmates. People who have never been in prison can tell you all they want, but only someone who has really been there knows the real score.
rewdiazepam
i have a very good friend who is a sgt at the state prison here, she told me that they have so many s.os that for the most part they get left alone. she said that federal is so much better, they keep busier and that my son would be fine once he settled in. this has held true. other than this incident he has been left alone. the only thing he said he couldnt do was go into the t.v. room, so make sure they have lots to read. he does keep busy, is playing a lot of sports and chess tournaments, he hardly has time to call.
The main reason your son is fairly safe is because he is at a minimum.
In every MEDIUM prison I was ever at and in every MEDIUM prison I ever heard of in OKLAHOMA, if your son had gone in there and admitted his charges, he would have most likely gotten hurt. He wouldn't have lasted a week. They would have seen the "new kid on the block", would not have known if he was weird or a snitch, and they would have have gotten him off the yard. He hadn't been there any time at all, and they would have had two or three inmates confront him and tell him he had to get the hell out of there." And your son, not being stupid, would have found a way to find another place to do his time.
The Sgt said that your son would be fine "once he settled in." I never saw a sex offender who admitted his charges have the chance "to settle in." They were gone the next day.
Maybe things are different from when I was in. Maybe there are so many SOs that the other inmates cannot fight them all.
I will share with the board what a guy who is still doing time in a medium in Oklahoma said about this. I write him every so often, as he was one of my former cellmates. I asked him if it would be wise for any sex offender to come to his prison and tell the other inmates of his charges. He said, "Hell no, Are you nuts?? You know what it was like when you were in. The guys around here would never allow a new sex offender inmate or a snitch to live in their neighborhood. They would have him "catching out" that day." This guy is at OSR at Granite in Oklahoma.
So you guys do what you want and advise your loved ones to do whatever. I am only trying to tell you that it is not wise at a MEDIUM to go in there and disclose the nature of your crime--until some of the other inmates get to know you.
If people are so sure that telling the truth is the best thing to do at a MEDIUM, then I just say this, "When your loved one goes into prison, if he is going into a MEDIUM or any MEDIUM in the Bible Belt, then just advise him to tell the absolute truth of his crime within the first week of his arrival. See what happens. See how he is received by some of the hardcore inmates there at the medium.
rewdiazepam
When I went in, I saw snitches, sex offenders, and child abusers getting beat up and shipped out to another prison for their own protection. The ones getting beat up were new arrivals, but some of the sex offenders that had been there for a while were left alone. I am a fairly tough guy, but I am not Mike Tyson and I am not stupid.
After I saw what was happening to the other NEW inmates there with sex charges, I decided to be evasive on my charges and if I was pressed, I had a cover story made up.
After I had been there a few months, I had made some friends, had a good job , and nobody ever asked my about my charges again. I played softball, played spades and hearts, and even walked the yard freely.
I was accepted at that point. But even if they had found out, it would not have been that much of a deal because they knew me by then and respected me. They will overlook your charges to a degree if they know and like you.
I am just telling you what happened and what my experience at a medium was.
You can discount my story or take it with a grain of salt or whatever. But for anyone to say that you can go into a medium and allow the old hardcore convicts to know you are in there for a sex crime without getting hurt is just insane. Insane thinking.
rewdiazepam