Depression Support Group
Depression is a real and debilitating condition that is often misunderstood by family and friends. Its meaning can range from a prolonged period of sadness to an actual mental illness with specific symptoms. Find and share experiences with others who are going through the same struggles.
I had posted a couple of times about being stood up in a casual relationship. I had the opportunity lastnight to practice boundaries, an issue for me. I was stood up over labor day weekend by a lover, if you want to call it that. It hit me hard and really affected me. So here we are about three waeks later and he texted me lastnight because he wanted to know why I wasn't calling or talking to him. I followed the advice of some people here just to ignore him as he's in a sense taking advantage of the situation. Of course he texts me yesterday just as I'm getting ready to leave, go dancing and shake him off.
Him: You been busy?
Me: "Yes, well you know, TBH when you said that you would let me know what you were up to a couple of weekends ago and I just heard nothing, I accepted the hint...right?"
Him: "Wait? I didn't get back to you? I did, you just didn't reply....oh shit, I know what you mean now, I got drunk and it slipped my mind, I'm a terrible texter. I'm sorry if I hurt you, it was not intentional."
Me: "OK"
Him: "Do you wanna catch up later and let me make it up to you?"
Me: "I don't know how to tell you this, but I think you should find a legit girlfriend."
Him: "What is that supposed to mean? Why are you saying this now?"
Me; "Because I'm not even trying to be mean, for real."
Him: "What you are saying makes sense for sure, but why are you saying it now."
Me: "IDK some people are friends with benefits but I don't think this is where I will be putting my energy."
Him: "What were you expecting between us?"
Me: "Nothing, I'm just saying that a couple of weeks went by and I don't think this is where I'm going to spend my energy."
Him: "Well alright then, I don't want to push, if you want to catch up later, I'm game."
I didn't answer after that, just went out, tried to forget about it and hung out with my friends. I was hoping he would figure it out by my silence, but he wanted an answer, which is fair. I was so stressed and emtional during this. I guess I realized when I was stood up that maybe if I had a real relationship I would not be dealing with this, and I sort of realized that is what I want in life, even if I can't have it with him. I was hurt when he said 'what were you expecting between us,' but I guess that's fair. Anyway, these stupid dramas affect my mood disorders, etc and are a trigger. It helps when I can vent and get it off my chest. Maybe the universe wanted to give me the opportunity to express what I was thinking. My first reaction a couple of weeks ago was to block him, but then I unblocked him because I wanted to woman up and just face it, which I think I did. Maybe I did want a relationship after all and just didn't realize it. Thanks for reading my saga! Hahahaha.
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Ever since I stopped doing therapy because of insurance, I've been feeling that old tense and irritable sense of anxiety and stress. I hate that. I was making so many strides and changes during therapy, my therapist would acknowledge all of my progress and accomplishments, and I miss that reassurance. Today I thought about it, and I made those changes! She would always tell me that I chose to...
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I invited Bill to have dinner with me last Sunday. He wasn't willing to drive 7 hours to mid Michigan and teased me with his beautiful ribs!!! So, of course I ate alone and had cedar salmon
Sounds like a familiar tale which many have been through. I'd take it as a necessary step in your personal growth. It's hard to navigate in a new direction sometimes. Hard to let go of a familiar partner also even if you know it's not what you need long term. Hope you figure out what you need.
I've had a couple different women want FWB but I turned them down. I knew it would cause hurt somewhere down the line. It's hard to control our urges for intimacy and comfort at times but it's also good to feel these things. To not cave to urges. Can help us change as people for the better.
You were very upset
I know someone now who's supposed to be in a friend's with benefits relationship and he's good with it but she always seems upset
It's definetely not for everyone
I know I couldn't do it
Good for you making a decision