I've never been afraid of death and I've always hated existing. It might sound kind of weird because I've never met someone who openly felt the same. It just kinda feels like I wasn't supposed to be here. I'm genuinely only still here because I'm afraid of what would happen if I came back or what my friends and family would think.

Everyone dies, so your time and my time will come. Many people also die wishing they accomplished more. I am old enough to realize every day of life is a gift, and I realize now I wasted my younger years thinking about death. I'll pray for you.

I used to fear death as a kid. The thought of ceasing to exist, would anyone miss me? Would I leave anything special behind? Would I have unfinished business?
I told my grandmother about it and she told me there's nothing wrong with that. Everyone fears death, some more than others and there ain't nothing you can do about it. Just keep smiling. Since then I've read books about death and even thought about how I'd like to die. I'd be happy dying of old age, sittin on a rocking chair on my porch with some whiskey next to me. A lot of my friends have said they'd like to die while saving someone. Talking/joking about it really helped me come to terms with it.

I'm back and forth on the whole wishing I didn't exist thing. that's the nature of being alive I guess, well for most of us, the ones who aren't in the top 1% anyway. I cycle, I go from "life is good" to "other people are pissing me off" to "I'm pissing them off and acting like an asshole" and then into "I should be a better person" which usually lands me in depression, or on the dark side.

Like gladdmatt said, everyone dies. that is a thought that, at one point, helped me to stop the obsessive thoughts of death, and it still works. i will have a death one day but until then i have to live. that's all there is to it. so i try not to think about it.

Hi Melons, I’m so glad you are holding on to hope. That is one of the insidious things about depression and despair. They take away hope and make our future seem bleak and dark. That was something I learned in a wonderful article I read about the power of hope when I found myself struggling with despair. I am not sure if you believe in a higher power but here’s a great article that I want to share with you that talks about how hope can save us from despair http://bit.ly/2j2tPyE You are in my prayers.

I think about death too. But each time i have tried ,something happens so i am going to have to live as i keep on waking up. I am scared to kill myself too but yet i have researched ways and figured with my luck i will become a paraplegic so then i would be trapped in my body..I am not sure what life has to offer but i do remember times where i was happy. I am really seeing positive things more now and when people get rude i hide.