Depression Support Group
Depression is a real and debilitating condition that is often misunderstood by family and friends. Its meaning can range from a prolonged period of sadness to an actual mental illness with specific symptoms. Find and share experiences with others who are going through the same struggles.
I guess at some level this is relevant ,,,
For me ..I was working at the Dept. of Children and Family Services which was/is a State agency that is the umbrella agency in Florida for State social services,,,specifically in Adult Protective Services ,,as an ALF monitor/case manager.
I had gotten to work on that day..traffic was not unusual.. I have to drive 95 which passes just under on of the main airport runways at Ft. Laud/Hollywood Airport for me it was a bit of a game to drive either fast enough or slow enough to time myself to be just directly under a jet as it landed which made it about 100ft +/- above the roof of my car as it flew over,,(cheap thrills on driving to work)...Made it in as normal, everyone was either cheerful or in a bitchy mood depending on who it was ,,,nothing out of the ordinary,,,My section worked in a cubical,,some workers had their actual own offices I guess it depended on the pecking order and who knew who and and was liked by who,,,office politics ,,nothing unusual there,
The building was called the Sony Building (still) as at one time it was Sony HQ for South Florida,,they moved out some years before ,,and sold it or leased it to the State of Florida,,legend has it, the place or grounds was an environment hazard area, not sure why, for $1. and that is why Sony ran,,,
Anyway ...on that morning (Tuesday), I spent the morning like most mornings there aside from babbling away and visiting some of the other people in my dept, in their cubical and killing time,,I was going through or preparing document packets I would need for the day,
Some I can't remember who came into the common area between our cubicals and matter of factly mentioned that something happened in NYC that morning ,,,they were not sure what ,,,,than it was followed up in short order with news on the radio on the first tower being hit by a plane ,,and like most everyone in America ,,,the thought was that a light aircraft ,,maybe a Piper or Beechcraft lost its barrings and hit the building ,,,ho hum another day in NYC...someone soon lifted a small tv from somewhere ,,,and then we knew,,,it was like everyone appeared as a zombie ,,to me it almost took on a cartoonish feeling ,,,nothing was or seemed very real,,kind of like an altered state of conciousness,,reality has flown out the window,,,we were watching the television of the first tower on fire and smoke billowing over the skyline ,,some people called NY to relatives there ,,not sure if they got through or not,,,We saw the second plane hit the second tower live on television like everyone else who was watching at the time ,, Everyone was in literal shock..rumour starting to fly that the Capitol was hit, that the Pentagon was hit, also that the While House had been hit ,,no one knew what to believe or what was true and what was just a rumour,,,We learned that the Pentagon had been hit which was confirmed soon afterward,,
The rest of the day was a nightmare ,,,and when I drove home there were no planes at all in the air anywhere to be seen,,,nothing on the tarmac-line of planes waiting in line for their take-off turn..usually at drive time back at 5:15/p normally there were about 5 planes waiting in line for their turn,,there was nothing ,,just parked planes. As I went to work the next morning the same route,,it was that way for the better part of a week...
A couple of days later ,,,I had a P.O box then as well as my home address for normal paranoid reasons,(?)..I got check from my father's investments and statements on a monthly basis and they went to the box,,, the investment firm was located at the WTC,,,I got a statement from the WTC address postmarked Sept. 11, 2001..which I though was pretty odd,,,seems that..perhaps the mail was processed in the early morning there on 9/11 with that postmark date ,,,,,I thought that I needed to keep this ,,,,,
I still have it ,,,,somewhere, unopened,,,,
neil
For me ..I was working at the Dept. of Children and Family Services which was/is a State agency that is the umbrella agency in Florida for State social services,,,specifically in Adult Protective Services ,,as an ALF monitor/case manager.
I had gotten to work on that day..traffic was not unusual.. I have to drive 95 which passes just under on of the main airport runways at Ft. Laud/Hollywood Airport for me it was a bit of a game to drive either fast enough or slow enough to time myself to be just directly under a jet as it landed which made it about 100ft +/- above the roof of my car as it flew over,,(cheap thrills on driving to work)...Made it in as normal, everyone was either cheerful or in a bitchy mood depending on who it was ,,,nothing out of the ordinary,,,My section worked in a cubical,,some workers had their actual own offices I guess it depended on the pecking order and who knew who and and was liked by who,,,office politics ,,nothing unusual there,
The building was called the Sony Building (still) as at one time it was Sony HQ for South Florida,,they moved out some years before ,,and sold it or leased it to the State of Florida,,legend has it, the place or grounds was an environment hazard area, not sure why, for $1. and that is why Sony ran,,,
Anyway ...on that morning (Tuesday), I spent the morning like most mornings there aside from babbling away and visiting some of the other people in my dept, in their cubical and killing time,,I was going through or preparing document packets I would need for the day,
Some I can't remember who came into the common area between our cubicals and matter of factly mentioned that something happened in NYC that morning ,,,they were not sure what ,,,,than it was followed up in short order with news on the radio on the first tower being hit by a plane ,,and like most everyone in America ,,,the thought was that a light aircraft ,,maybe a Piper or Beechcraft lost its barrings and hit the building ,,,ho hum another day in NYC...someone soon lifted a small tv from somewhere ,,,and then we knew,,,it was like everyone appeared as a zombie ,,to me it almost took on a cartoonish feeling ,,,nothing was or seemed very real,,kind of like an altered state of conciousness,,reality has flown out the window,,,we were watching the television of the first tower on fire and smoke billowing over the skyline ,,some people called NY to relatives there ,,not sure if they got through or not,,,We saw the second plane hit the second tower live on television like everyone else who was watching at the time ,, Everyone was in literal shock..rumour starting to fly that the Capitol was hit, that the Pentagon was hit, also that the While House had been hit ,,no one knew what to believe or what was true and what was just a rumour,,,We learned that the Pentagon had been hit which was confirmed soon afterward,,
The rest of the day was a nightmare ,,,and when I drove home there were no planes at all in the air anywhere to be seen,,,nothing on the tarmac-line of planes waiting in line for their take-off turn..usually at drive time back at 5:15/p normally there were about 5 planes waiting in line for their turn,,there was nothing ,,just parked planes. As I went to work the next morning the same route,,it was that way for the better part of a week...
A couple of days later ,,,I had a P.O box then as well as my home address for normal paranoid reasons,(?)..I got check from my father's investments and statements on a monthly basis and they went to the box,,, the investment firm was located at the WTC,,,I got a statement from the WTC address postmarked Sept. 11, 2001..which I though was pretty odd,,,seems that..perhaps the mail was processed in the early morning there on 9/11 with that postmark date ,,,,,I thought that I needed to keep this ,,,,,
I still have it ,,,,somewhere, unopened,,,,
neil
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89FToday it is again another hot day but cooler then yesterday. Since this is August it is to be expected in my neck of the woods. All the grass is yellow and flowers are starting to go to seed. I need to water my garden but this time of the year I'm so over it, which is weird because all my plants have their fruit or veggies.Sandra, this time of year reminds me of your Dad and his toms. We'd...
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What is your story,,,,???
neil
Beholding, in horror, like most of America and the world watching as people scrambled for their lives and met their fate from atop the tower and out the windows, and all the while thinking that this was a "terrorist attack", believing the propaganda that was fed to the people, and since learned that the real terrorist were those within my own nation, that the reports reveal that certain officials within my own government and its security agencies KNEW that the attack was forthcoming and declined to prevent it. My people have come to the realization that a reason to invade Iraq was needed, weapons of mass destruction were not convincing enough to get the support of the American people, thus, a REASON was presented.
Lies, lies, and more cover-ups. And the families of those who met their fate that day STILL do not have the answers to why delay in action was taken that could have prevented this massacre and as to why, as reports have since disclosed, certain people from a certain nation were NOT present at the WTC, but were actually called, in advance of the attack, and told NOT to report to work. Now that nation has the most advanced intelligence known to mankind and surely this information was shared with my nation's intelligence as matter of national security. No doubt it was. Answers still sought by the family members, but are elusive. Question upon question presented since that day, with no concrete and substantial answer forthcoming. A thorough investigation is warranted, but who will perform it? All the families and my nation's people have is a memorial of what will probably go down in history as one of the major catastrophic events in the history of my country.
And, to insult the intellect of my people further, study upon study reveal the boasterous significance of the numbers 9-11 to the orchestrators and monsters of this century who are striving to fulfill their illusion of global government. A review of the catastrophies in history that have occurred and are related to this infamous number are staggering. More and more of my people are convinced these events have not occurred by accident.
I quote not one but two prominent individuals who have made comments related to the globalization of government and the extreme objective to attain it:
J. Edgar Hoover, ex-FBI director: "the individual is handicapped by coming face-to-face with a conspiracy so monstrous he cannot believe it exists".
George H.W.Bush: "if the American people knew what we have done, they would string us up from the lamp posts". And, again, in his speach on 9-11-1990 in front of U.S. congress: "out of these troubled times (the gulf war episode), we can see our 5th objective, a new world order coming into view. This is not about one small country (USA), it a big idea, a new world order, where nations join in common cause to reach the common aspirations of mankind." and on the 11th year of that speach, Flight 11 hig the big "11" in NYC at 11 minutes to 9.
Coincidence? Now what the hell is that?
I weep for those we witnessed sacrificed for the insane objectives of those who are insane themselves.
I'm sick to death of the lies! And, this old gal is mad as hell!
I was flabbergasted. I called my Dad and we dsicussed the horror of it and the potential ramifications. What a sad, sad day. A distressing day for so many.
I had a big sweet Rottweiler to train that day.
Plus I was going to call my best friend Jule that night. She was on vacation....in New York.
A dream of hers.
I had my coffee....looking out the window over the valley.
My phone rang. It was my sister.
"We 've been attacked! What do I do?" (She lives in Vancouver)
"What do you mean? "
"Turn the TV on!"
I did.......my coffee hit the floor.
I watched the TV....saw the second plane hit....then it hit me.
Jule was visiting the towers that day!
I called her cell....her message said she was "spending the day at the World Trade Center ....one of her planned sights to see. (She was so excited!)
My breath stopped....you see Jule always did what she said she was going to do)
I knew.
I watched.......and listened....when they fell I knew.....I just knew....
I had lost her.
The dog didn't get his trading that day.
The carpet still has a coffee stain.
And they never found her.
One of those never found.
Days later I got a delivery of all she 'd left in her hotel room.
She had no family.
There was a pile of postcards she 'd gotten for me.
Her journal.
One of her cameras.
All her stuff.
It 's all in my storage room.
I spent that day watching the lights of many souls drift....some hovering...others sailing....some floating off beyond our imagination.
All on live TV.
I thought of what it would look like from space....all those beautiful lights!
What a wonderous sight that must have been!
I burned Sage.....prayed my Father 's prayers....the Cherokee prayers of joy and love.
U
As I dozed off that night to the flickering candle...I felt a breath... caught a glorious whiff of her perfume....a light touch on my face.... and my soul overflowed with love.
Then....after all that day....I cried.
Miss you my girl!
Life is not the same without your beauty.....your joy.
Can you hear my songs? My words?
I 'll see you someday.....keep the Tequila cold!
Robin
I wrote that here : http://www.dailystrength.org/c/Depression/forum/14923981-today-911
All this conspiracy theory is sickening. Obama bin Laden is dead and plots have been foiled. That's enough for me.
Annie
I am remembering more about that day, finally, without tragic consequences for my mood. I feel more balanced and normal about how I am still grieving for everything that happened....as I recall the emotions that stormed into all of our lives that morning.
We were just back from a week-long fishing trip, up North. I was sleeping in-because I hadn't been able to sleep very well on the tiny beds in the cabin, all week.
Husband was outside on the side stoop, having coffee, because it was a glorious morning here (as it was over most of the Eastern seaboard). Then I heard him talking to our neighbour from across the street, whose voice seemed unusually strained and urgent. Husband then came in and turned on the television. I got up and started a cup of coffee. He didn't utter a word (not unusual for him, but now I see it in a different light).
He went to the TV in the livingroom, and flipped it over to CNN. I peered through the little shelf-divider from the kitchen, wondering why he was turning on the TV on such a peaceful morning. I took my coffee into the livingroom, and silently watched as he mumbled a few of the things back to me that Rocky had told him. To his amazement, and mine, they were true.
We stood together, hugging and watching in utter shock and disbelief, and crying.
It took what seemed like hours to get through my head what was happening. The rest of the day is now a hazy patchwork of staring at the TV, blinking back tears that would not stop, and horrendous worry, because I could not get through to my family in the States on the phone. The largest highway in Ontario was completely closed to traffic, and the international bridge crossings were all shut tight for two+ days. It was phenomenal how cut-off I felt from the people I loved the most---and how fast our lives can change, almost in an instant.
Then came the inevitable backlash of horrid, insenstive things that some Canadians felt needed to be expressed toward their American neighbours. That was very hard to take.
Fortunately, compassion eventually ruled the days, and common sense and generosity grandiosity took their rightful places, again. I was relieved that not everyone was a knee-jerk armchair political 'expert'.
And Neil and kodasmoma, your experiences, and the way you wrote them to share with us, touched my heart. No need for editing, at all.
and when it sunk in, I immediately felt the change all over the country. no young people can understand what it is to spend all your life thinking your country is the badass of the world and nothing can ever happen to us