Depression Support Group
Depression is a real and debilitating condition that is often misunderstood by family and friends. Its meaning can range from a prolonged period of sadness to an actual mental illness with specific symptoms. Find and share experiences with others who are going through the same struggles.
Its been a while, not sure why, but I cant enter daily strength from Spain. Things have changed for me, we now have a 6 month old baby called Sandra.
The best moments of my life have been when I play with her and I can see that she is going to be a good girl and intelligent.
Times are really tough, I have lost the job I am supposed to have now and I have no money coming in, the Spanish goverment is not willing to help me out and on top of that the inlaws dont want me coming back to their house over cultural differences and my wife seems to take their side, I should have a teaching job starting in September but it looks like it will be the start of a second wave.
I feel seriously suicidal, I thought these sort of thoughts would go away after having a child but they havent, in fact I now feel guilty on top of it as I am trying my best to find a way to earn an income and nothing is working.
I am in the Uk at the moment, mum said she will lend me some money but the bank has blocked her account and said she cant transfer me the cash as she is bed ridden and has no way of entering the bank, they said yesterday they would send someone out from the bank yesterday to prove it was her, but all they did was send out the police so her account is still blocked.
I told my wife that this was a nightmare situation for me and all she could respond was that I am being pathetic and now i have a child that I should grow up. She has the support of her family and she is working and is not helping me out.
Hopefully things change soon.
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My day...today...misplaced my debit card...didn't realize it until I got to the register after shopping to a full cart. Used a different debit card and pulled apart everything looking for missing debit card before I left parking lot. Got home, dropped keys. So now I have a missing debit card, missing keys. A full cartload to unload and put away. I got everything put away.Dumped purse for a...
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I don't really know how to label this but I having a rough week and I can't say it's one thing.... I have a lot on my plate which is nothing new and I try to cope in many positive ways and do but I still have my moments.My kids more so my daughters talk to me about everything which I know it's cause of comfort and we are close.... however I really struggle with the venting about their dad which...
Do you have someone to talk to about your suicidal ideas?
Your baby sounds beautiful. Post a picture so we all can see. She is your future. Hold onto that.
Also, DS only allows IPs from the US, UK, and Canada. Use a VPN in Spain that allows you to select your IPs origin. I'm in the US, but my IP is in the UK.
Tell us how it is going with you. I have been where you are at. Many on this board have. So we are with you and can help support you.
Firstly do you have enough cash to see you through the next few weeks. Eventually the bank /your mother should be able to sort that out.
A friend of mine teaches English in Spain. Does a huge amount of classes online. Look into it.
Thirdly and perhaps this should be first see a doctor. Asap.
As to cultural differences - when you are in your in laws don't sweat it. Most people dislike their in laws. Remember a child is stressful for your wife too.
Be as pragmatic as you can. Rational.
Your child needs you. In whatever shape you appear ! Imagine your wife explaining to your child that you killed yourself because you were unemployed for one year ? Think that through.
I have enough cash to see me through a few weeks and I will search for online classes.
The situation for me is quite dire as I could end up on the Spanish streets but I will try hard.
Are things really that bad with your wife that she'd put you out on the streets?
Bottom line is that you need to sort yourself out first. You are a UK citizen. Get some medication asap and counseling while you are there.
He did suggest advertising as much as you can near schools. Language. But are all language schools closed ?
Wake up and read positive devotions, write down 3 things you are grateful for, 2 or 1 if that's all you can think of at the moment. In the evening, write down 3 things that were positive in your day and focus on those things instead of the negative.
Speaking as a woman, we sometimes put the man we love on a pedestal and forget he is human. That is not the fair thing to do as we put too much pressure on him to be superman. Just remember you can do anything you put your mind to, dont give up...
But they WILL get better. I promise you. You need to just take it one day, and one step at a time like others have already said. It helps to keep something in mind that you can look forward to. You will be there for your daughter as she grows up, and you will be there to see all of her quirks, insights, hopes, dreams, fears, flaws, and strengths. Hold on to that—that is meaning in your life, and absolutely worth living for.
I don’t understand what is going on with your wife however. Not helping you out? You two should be a team, and by not helping you she is not helping her daughter, either. I’d say you should consider counseling with her, or therapy for yourself, but sadly that can be expensive, too. Perhaps you could at least try to keep a daily journal in addition to writing down gratitude and good things that happened during the day you can also sort through whatever is going on with you and your wife.
Do not despair as this kind of situation has happened to a lot of us... you are not alone.
Please approach a therapist whom can help you with your depression right now. Try your best to stay positive, because your baby girl needs you. Try to resolve your differences with your wife.
Most people's comments here are useful and practical, so do your best in finding work.
We are all here for you. Please keep us posted.
Regards, Ninawh.