Hi! Reaching out here is great first step! We are all here to listen and support each other without judgment. I know you said you don't like to talk to doctors, but perhaps at some point you can reach out to a counselor to help you.
Hope you are able to find some support here on DS!! Hope you can find some peace.

I think it is ok to do nothing and have no body. Our soicety tell us we should have this and that. I hate to see doctors too. I saw three experts. They all makes me feel bad. But you need money to live. There are ways to make money where it does not take much effort to do. But it takes understanding. You can hire people to make money for you, but it takes money. Do not give up. Keep looking for ways to impove. Do a little bit by little bit when you have the energy.Find a partner to go with you.

Definition of addiction
1: a compulsive, chronic, physiological or psychological need for a habit-forming substance, behavior, or activity having harmful physical, psychological, or social effects and typically causing well-defined symptoms (such as anxiety, irritability, tremors, or nausea) upon withdrawal or abstinence : the state of being addicted

2: a strong inclination to do, use, or indulge in something repeatedly

Here is more information on Pornography Addiction:

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Pornography_addiction


Any addiction can be very difficult to break. There are two sides to an addiction. What and Why. If you feel addicted, you need to find out why and your best advice is the Internet. It is private and vast. I suggest you use it to find your way to fixing the problems you describe. It may take a professional therapist or counselor and your dislike may keep you from that. For now, online help is available.

Possible causes of pornography 'addiction' are loneliness, low self esteem, social anxiety, need for love etc. It can be very complex.

Here is a Dailystrength group on the subject:

https://www.dailystrength.org/group/sex-pornography-addiction

I would suggest a councellor. It's important to have a sympathetic ear. However failing that look up addiction groups. There might be a porn addiction support group or a broad issue addiction group. I don't know if Life ring are in your area.
Goggle porn addiction support groups.
There might be online groups.
It's not the worst addiction to have. It doesn't cost much to maintain but obviously you got to get a handle on it

So many people are hooked on porn and it destroys life after life. It warps your idea of an ideal woman that soon your wife or partner doesn’t excite you anymore. Eventually you will be lonely. There is a group that might be able to help you, their website is called Newlife. Google it. They have a book called “Every Man’s Battle,” by Steve Arterburn and Fred Stoker. I have recommended it here many times and it helped some friends because this book helps you understand what you are fighting. Get rid of the porn that you might have a better life.