When people put others down they are not happy with themselves. They have to make others hurt to feel good about themselves. So what do you do? You are in a bad spot right now but...like you said you are almost done with college finish get a degree and get a great job make yourself the better person. You can make it through this it will be hard. As they say one day at a time. Look to the end goal and you will succeed. We are all here to support you. Hugs

Abusive people project onto others, the way they feel about themselves. It's a call for love. Don't let the negative words upset you. No matter how bad of a picture they paint, they are not you, they are just words, and they cannot hurt you! Always keep that in mind. Look within yourself for your own Love which you already have and try to avoid negative emotions like self pity. These are blocks to the awareness of Love's presence. Always focus on the positive and face your fears with a smile :)

God Bless!

Thank you so much for the words of encouragement. I needed that so much today. I was feeling really down and could not think correctly. I just felt so alone and I came across this forum and needed support from someone. I am trying to look at the positives and thanks for the comments again it made a big difference on my day.

First off, congratulations on finishing college, that is an AMAZING achievement, and you should be so proud! I can relate to your school stress. I graduated in June, and I am in my first semester at a four year. It's super stressful, especially that I suffer from anxiety and depression among other things. It's a lot to deal with when you don't have a good support system. All I really have is my little sister, who is really the reason why I breathe, but because she is young I don't feel it's appropriate to vent to her. I'm really sorry that your father is like that. No one deserves that sort of treatment, especially at the hands of the people who created them. I think that this website is a really great way to meet people who understand your situational struggles and can offer support. I'm here if you ever want to vent or talk! Hugs!! -C

Keep talking. Keep sharing. If you can get some therapy so that you have another avenue for support. Is there anyone else you can live with besides your parents?

Moondreamer1988 Thank you for your support. I wish I could talk to my sister but she chooses not to. And my brother and I are not in speaking terms. I wish I had family to turn too but I do not.

Heidiclark I have thought about going to get help from my on universities counseling services. However, I know a lot of the people who intern there since my major is (social work). I feel that if I went I would be a little embarrassed knowing they would know about my situation.

I'm new to this website as well, so welcome. I understand being in a family with verbal abuse for the most part, and it still effects me to this day. I also have severe anxiety, which I think stems from them and the high expectations that were always held of me to be perfect constantly; in dance, in school, on dance team, in college, in my career, etc. My therapists always looked to my mother, who held the highest expectations of me growing up, as a key factor of my developing anxiety; and then my mother wouldn't let me see them anymore. I was constantly raised to feel like I was never up to her standard. She would comment on my weight in saying "I never looked like you when I was your age. You need to take care of yourself" weighing 130 lbs. She is just a superficial woman, as she is a hair stylist, and of course I develop alopecia (stress-related hair loss). She basically tells me that I'm the cause of my own hair loss and looks at me as though I'm disgusting from time to time. I feel she will never appreciate me or respect me until I look like a fitness model with a full head of gorgeous hair. She never understood and day without makeup, even if I was in the house studying or doing homework all day. She tells me I look horrible in headbands, which keep me comfortable with my condition. I could go on and on so the mental games and the verbal abuse is real for me too. I am here for you if you ever need to talk.

dancingintherain thanks for much support I feel that we have a similar situation. My dad is very similar to your mom. I have always tried to please him, hoping that maybe one day I would get acceptance from him. And now that I am older I have found my voice and I am now voicing my feeling and he is not okay with that. He has always been the person that is his way or no way. But I am tired of his abuse. I am now standing up for myself.
Thanks so much for giving me words of encouragement and listening to me.

I came back home to care for my father who's health was failing. When I did, in brought the baggage of my childhood with me. It took me sometime to realize that the feelings I had (can't do anything right; you can't do that (because I'm not a guy), were feelings of the past that I harbored. Since your major is social work, you understand how important it is to talk with someone and work through the issues. You can only be responsible for your actions and how you choose to respond to him. So let go of yesterday, for each day is brand new.