I'm not really sure what to say, but all I can say is just what I wrote/indicated in the title/tagline.  I'm not sure exactly what happened, if I got carried away with myself or if I was just being too emotional.  The story is that an old friend of mine had popped into my head-I hadn't seen him in ten years.  I'd always thought of him as a cool guy-we were platonic friends and we were dating other people.  Strangely, shortly after I'd been thinking of him, he messaged me on facebook.  I sent him a friend request and we reconnected.  I was absolutely ecstatic. We started chatting, and I was shocked at how well he remembered me and so many specifics!  He said he wanted to get together, so we did. We had dinner about six weeks ago.  I'm not sure exactly what happened, but I was so confused because I never felt anything but platonic feelings for him before, and suddenly I was experiencing a flood of attraction, desire and romantic feelings.  I was so scared by it.  It hadn't occurred to me right away, but sort of came up on me several days to a week later. I started to get the feeling that he had developed an interest in me because he messaged me the following day after we had dinner and said that he really enjoyed it and would like to get together again soon.  I agreed.  We were keeping in touch messaging and he asked me for my phone number too.

As a coincidence we have the same birthdate, and used to hang out a lot together in the past and celebrate our birthday, so I sent him a note and asked him if he'd like to get together as there was a public event for people celebrating summer birthdays. With kind of a feeling for old times, I asked him if he wanted to go-it was three weeks out. He agreed and signed up for the event.

I was really surprised at myself because I was looking toward the event with so much nervous anticipation, and every time he messaged me, my heart started racing. That never happened to me with him before, so I realized that I was developing feelings for him.  I was so ecstatic when he said he was looking forward to our birthday and to spending some time hanging out. I felt so comfortable and relaxed when with him.

As the date got closer, I started to feel extremely uncomfortable. He fell out of touch and I started to feel like something was wrong.  A few days prior I was going to cancel because something seemed off. In the meanwhile, between the time he looked me up and we refriended, he deactivated his social media account and never called. I started to get a little suspish. Something told me he would not be coming, but I didn't want to chicken out and bail.

The day of the event, he messaged me with what sounded like a lame excuse, saying he could not make it, and some vague reference to hanging out "sometime". I just started crying...and crying...and crying...about a week went by and he didn't communicate with me at all, nor did he do anything to make up for it.  I took him off my social media because the pain was just too much. I didn't want to be mean to him, as I'm sure he wouldn't like that, but I had to think of myself. I couldn't stop obsessing about him or the situation and felt I needed to make a break. It was just killing me seeing his activity but being ignored by him and this happened to me in relationships before. 

He pulled a stunt like this 14 years ago on our birthday and it led to the demise of our friendship. He said he was sorry we lost touch. I couldn't believe he dropped the bomb again-fourteen years later-repeating what he'd done before. I'd given him a second chance, and this time I was falling for him which made the situation far more awful.  I was crushed.

Yeah-I just looked-he blocked me on social media-really? Ridiculous. So ridiculous. 

Why? Why does it have to happen? I just don't understand.