Depression Support Group
Depression is a real and debilitating condition that is often misunderstood by family and friends. Its meaning can range from a prolonged period of sadness to an actual mental illness with specific symptoms. Find and share experiences with others who are going through the same struggles.
My life is so bad. I posted before. My fiancee died over 3 years ago and I am trying to cope but every week there is something bad. Little things like falling or not sleeping but big ones that are too much. I could list them all but I know other people have problems. For instance car breaking down and a big expense people dying, my cat went blind plus more too numerous to say. Now my job will end and I will not be eligible for unemployment and the bills are big. My job is very stressful dealing with the public and they make me sad. People are losing their jobs and we are told the economy is getting better and I feel so bad for them. I am so afraid of what is next. People talk about self fulfilling prophecies but things are even worse than I could imagine. Thanksgiving at my brother's his wife wanted us all to weitr what we are thankful for and it was then I realized my life sucks. Sure I am thankful for family pets and relatively good health and it may seem blasphemous but I really don't have anything else. I am nervous and now will not have any money coming in. I can't take much more and can't cope. I can't even afford to go to the doctor and now they will make everyone have health insurance when I am in a lot of debt. I know all of you have your own problems but I can't take much more and friends just say it will be all right and something good will come my way but life just doesn't work out that way.
Thanks for listening. QP
Thanks for listening. QP
Is also a Bereavement board on DS many have said it has helped them http://www.dailystrength.org/c/Bereavement/support-group
Thanks for sharing so very much of your life with us. You certainly have had a lot to cope with in the not-to-distant past as well as the present. Your coping ability to this point has been truly awesome, inspiring. Most of us would surely buckle under the weight of all you are having to deal with in life right now. So don't belittle your self, or your problems. At DS everyone matters, and everyone's problems matter. Others can only help and offer some compassion if they know more precisely what you are dealing with, so you did a great job of sharing.
I really don't have any golden words of wisdom for you. I certainly agree with Max about checking out the grief and bereavement groups here at DS. Those folks will certainly relate to the problems you are having coping with the loss of your fiance.
You are an amazing person to have done so well for so long under your oppressive circumstances. Try to continue to stay in the game and keep working with the things you can work on in your life, such as getting your car fixed - - - maybe a credit card? Also finding a new job. Someone as intelligent as you are, as well spoken and as skilled in helping other will surely be able to find employment after this job ends. But if you can, look for that job now, yeah, hard without a car...
So change what you can in your life. You do have the power and the control over some things, so work with those.
The things you cannot control, you must learn to accept. That will bring you more peace. (Serenity Prayer)
Take care, BB
You do sound like you have been struggling with overcoming one hurdle after another. I hate this, and I hate that it does seem like you are stuck in an ongoing nightmare, with one hurdle after another.
Suggest you get with doc and consider antidepressant and antianxiety meds to help take the "edge" off the razor of situations you have found yourself in. Suggest you seek a therapist to help you deal with the loss of your mate, or at the least a grief support group. These are really effective means to aid us in moving on with our lives. Of course, nothing will heal that loss, even time won't entirely. But, these are means to help you cope with it and to help you find peace in the good memories that you have with you mate.
Also, I am truely sorry about the loss of your job. I lost out being stable employed 3 years ago. Only last fall was I able to regain an old client I had back in the good old days and have been able to work again in an area I am trained for and have some meager means of support to contribute to my household. It is rough being without a job. But, encourage you to check into why you won't be able to receive unemployment. Perhaps there is a legal means by which your employer will be obligated to provide you with the ability to draw your unemployment.
At the very worse, if you have surmountable bills, and no income to cover them, and no means of support by family or friends, there is always bankruptcy to unload that debt from you. Many have had to go this route, because of necessity, not because they wanted to. There is life after bankruptcy. An attorney can apprise you of your options. And, most attorneys will meet with you for an initial consultation, free of charge. Encourage you to enlist with the unemployment office for jobs training skills and placement. And keep sending out those resumes. Yes, I know that for someone who hasn't held a regular job in 3 years this sounds almost stupid to suggest, but I still do it. I still think there is something out there for me. And there is for you. You may have to relocate. That is primarily my hang up. It would be very costly for me to sell off what I have and relocate to an area where I would find employment for my skills, because the value of real estate has plummeted, and I do not wish to move. So, I have made the choice to "ride this thing out" where I am, by living very, very frugally, and limiting my spending, to manage my bills. But, I am married, and thus far, Hubby has been able to keep a job. It makes a huge difference in this economic nightmare to have income contribution when we don't. Suggest you look for cost cutting ways to live on the cheap until you can get another job. DollarStretcher.com and TipHero.com and Bankrate.com are useful sites to help with this.
The Healthcare Act does provide for those who cannot afford healthcare to get onto an exchange (since you will be out of work, you can't pay for healthcare, now can you) and have the government pay their premiums until they can afford it. Suggest you check with your State's web site for more info on this and where you need to sign up for health care assistance.
Can you move in with a relative until you get another job and back on your feet?
All is not so dire, there are little glimmer of lights (hope). Information is power to reduce some of that anxiety from not knowing what's coming down the drain pipe. Suggest you get with others who are more aware of what is going on with the economy and with the health care act, so you can begin informing yourself with ways to take care of yourself. And research, research, research. The internet is a valuable tool for this.
Believe you will be just fine. If I can do this for 3 years, you can do it for a little while, hopefully, because you may be able to relocate to an area that has jobs to offer.
Bad things happen to good people. That's just the way it is. None of us are immune from bad things (situations and circumstances) happening to us. It is how we choose to handle them that make all the difference. A therapist can help you to look at situations from a another perspective other than a doom and gloom and negative one. Sometimes if does feel and, in truth is, like everything is falling down around us. A therapist can help you be able to cope with these times, very strategically, and very effectively.
Good Luck & Best Wishes, always.
((((Hugs))))
However, despite being blind, your cat can still rely on her other senses to relate to you and get to where she is going. Encourage you to keep her in a safe area where she will not fall preditor to another animal or get hit by a car. She has can have many, many years with you. Animals are very unique. I had a horse one time that went blind, but I was still able to take her on trail riding ventures. She didn't mind, as long as I was her "guide" she had no reservation going where I wanted her to go. She trusted me, just like your cat trusts you for safety. My horse lived a good old age, and died in my care. She is buried on my farm. Your cat is still able to give you love and affection. She will just rely on her other senses to get her where she wants to be . . . with you. Cat's sense of smell and extinct is awesome.
You are gonna be just fine.
((((Hugs))))
QP
Can I ask why you won't be eligible for unemployment? I don't know much about unemployment or how it works but thought it was suppose to help people who lost their job.
Have you looked online in your area and seen if there are any listing you may be interested in. Like in our area we have a site that lists places that are hiring. If so, you could start now and send in some resumes?
I am sorry about everything you are going through at this time. Max made a good suggestion about using the other groups in addition to ours. Welcome to the group.
QP