Thank you for your thread, I found it interesting to read others answers also. I won't include my story of telling others, as it is not as nice as the stories here.

I'm open about my brain injury too. It hasn't done me any good though and scared a would be date away from me too.

Most people won't shut you down merely because of a medical condition, unless they're just super shallow or jack -asses, so those aren't the kind of people you'd want to be around even when well, right? I think how people react to our diseases or conditions depends a lot on us, and how we see ourselves, how we act, what we bring to the table outside the condition or illness.

I try to see myself as healthy, well and whole, no matter how I'm feeling, no matter if my medical history says otherwise. It makes me feel better about myself and less stressed when I do that which draws people in, in return. Sometimes, it's just about lying to myself. I did that when I met my now husband. I was so freakin sick when we met but I just kept trying to act and feel normal. He knew I was sick when we met but I just tried to not let it consume our interactions. It's hard to do that when running to the bathroom every 10 minutes while on a date. But it made me feel normal to pretend it wasn't a big deal.

I have a close friend who is honest and direct with me, and me with her. Those are the best kinds of friends because they see through your BS. She has psoriatic arthritis and so she gets the whole chronic condition thing. Her hand is deformed from the arthritis and she's usually in constant pain. Still, we rarely talk about our conditions because we have so many other things to talk about. We met at work almost 20 years ago when we were young and disease free. We see each other almost every day at work (work in same department). But when one of us is having a bad health day, we just acknowledge it and carry on. We both try really hard not to be bummers because honestly neither one of us wants to be around people who are bummers all the time so we don't want to go there. It's like we keep each other from going down that slippery slope.

Good friends keep us on track and hold a mirror up to us. That mirror sucks sometimes but it's necessary. Relationships are a two way street; they need to be cared for by both parties. It's hard to do when you don't feel good or if you're hung up on your situation. It really is; I know it's hard for me to be engaged and supportive when I'm not well, especially when I'm in pain. Some friendships will withstand that and some may not. I don't think all friendships are the same or necessarily need to be forever. People are human, they change, they grow apart or they grow together. I don't prescribe to this notion that people shouldn't change. We're not stagnant beings. Our own lives change and so different people flow in and out of our lives throughout it.

Sorry for going on. It's kind of a timely topic for me, the friendship aspect, and so I've been thinking about that a lot over the last couple of weeks. Love your friends, accept them for who they are even when they aren't perfect. Let them go if it makes sense but remember we are part of the equation in those relationships. Victimhood will kill any relationship. I've walked away from people not because they weren't supportive to me or because they themselves had personal problems or health issues but because they brought such negativity to the relationship that it became unhealthy. It really is a hard line to walk, being open about your illness but not letting the illness define the dynamics in the relationship. It is something I'm definitely aware of in my own relationships.

I've had Crohn's for almost 30 years. Several resection surgeries and have had an ileostomy for the last 20 years. I was very self-conscious about when I got my first ileostomy (had a couple temporary ileostomies before decided to make the last one permanent). However now I'm pretty much open about it but I don't shove it out there. "Hi, pleased to meet you. I have Crohn's. How are you?". However if it comes up in a conversation I'll share my experience. The weird thing, more often than not the other person will say "Oh my cousin/friend/co-worker has Crohn's or UC." Then it is nice to help someone understand the disease so that they can relate to their acquaintance.