Breakups & Divorce Support Group
Just broke up with someone or in the midst of a difficult divorce? Breaking up is difficult no matter what the circumstances are. They say that time heals all wounds, but sometimes a listening ear or a hug can work wonders for the heart. Whether you need a place to vent, someone to hold you to No Contact, or need advice about what to do, we're here to help.
I have a complicated jumble of emotions that I'm trying to figure out. Now that my Ex is instantly dating her new guy, she has the freedom to see him any time she wants because the two older girls are at the house to watch my son.
I had an invite to go for a bike rise with a friend today, and I had to decline because it is my weekend with my son. Visitation time with my son is precious to me, but at the same time, I'd like to be able to go for a ride with the friend, but I don't have that option.
I'm frustrated that I can't go out and try meeting someone or try something new like kayaking with this friend, while my Ex can do whatever she wants. At the same time, I'm consumed with guilt for even wanting to give up an hour or two of visitation time.
What do others do when you have full weekend visitation, or how do you start a new life?
To make matters worse for me, I just dropped my son off at the house, and was thankful my Ex wasn't there, so I was able to continue this full week of no contact, though my heart is in my throat now when I think I might see her. I decided to take a walk down by the river along the canal trail. I got to the parking lot and guess who was there? His bright yellow car and her car, both with bike racks.
My heart started racing and I was pretty paralyzed for a minute. Do I let them keep me from my favorite place to walk, or do I high-tail it out of there and find somewhere else to walk? The emotions were extreme and were like the worst kind of roller-coaster. In the end, I decided leaving was the best course of action.
I came back to the apartment and the tears came. Do I even let her know I tried to go there and left? I guess not. I think the NC should continue, but it is killing me. When I finally had time to walk after dropping off my son, she had to be there with New Guy.
I had an invite to go for a bike rise with a friend today, and I had to decline because it is my weekend with my son. Visitation time with my son is precious to me, but at the same time, I'd like to be able to go for a ride with the friend, but I don't have that option.
I'm frustrated that I can't go out and try meeting someone or try something new like kayaking with this friend, while my Ex can do whatever she wants. At the same time, I'm consumed with guilt for even wanting to give up an hour or two of visitation time.
What do others do when you have full weekend visitation, or how do you start a new life?
To make matters worse for me, I just dropped my son off at the house, and was thankful my Ex wasn't there, so I was able to continue this full week of no contact, though my heart is in my throat now when I think I might see her. I decided to take a walk down by the river along the canal trail. I got to the parking lot and guess who was there? His bright yellow car and her car, both with bike racks.
My heart started racing and I was pretty paralyzed for a minute. Do I let them keep me from my favorite place to walk, or do I high-tail it out of there and find somewhere else to walk? The emotions were extreme and were like the worst kind of roller-coaster. In the end, I decided leaving was the best course of action.
I came back to the apartment and the tears came. Do I even let her know I tried to go there and left? I guess not. I think the NC should continue, but it is killing me. When I finally had time to walk after dropping off my son, she had to be there with New Guy.
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I'm horrified! I knew my insurance would go up due to getting a new car but I didn't expect it to go up over $2,000. I did have an accident with the snow/ice in the winter. I was just telling my brother that I have had my car since March 2, 2026 and have only spent $75 on an oil change. Now this! I called another insurance company and their quote was over $4,000. I guess I have to pay...
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We all have 24 hours in a day. How we spend these hours is important. Watching a little bit of a video about how sitting affects us made me aware of how much sitting and laying down I do. Gonna have to work on that.Your turn. Tell me another truth.
she doesn't care, probably gets a rise and chuckle out of your pain.
you don't get a life alone until your son is grown, he will become a teenager and sometime thereafter he won't have time for you (as it should be)
are the older girls your daughters?
My son is 11. You are right that he will grow up fast. I will be patient. While I'd like to meet people and do things, I'm not even positive if that's me or a reaction to my Ex's getting her bike buddy and dating new guy. I think I need to stop isolating and get out for me, but its all jumbled up inside.
You guys wee intimate very recently and you unfortunately have some serious healing to do. Your reaction when you saw her car and the subsequent tears are evident that you probably shouldn't date for a bit. But that certainly doesn't mean you can't go out and have fun with a friend..male or female. Personally of your time with your son is limited I would spend that time with him as this is a shock to him too. He values his time with you.
And I believe you did the correct thing leaving the lake if she was there. Maybe much later it will be ok, or a year or more once you catch up to her state of mind. Take care.
it sucks to be where you are (i'm similar)
if you live in a populated area lookup "meetup" a lot a groups
and "divorcecare", any way to connect, chitchat, get out of your own head.
take your son every chance you get
he needs a good man
I'm sorry your hurting over your ex wife's actions. I wouldn't say anything to her. She has really been a piece of work towards you, and you need to focus on your healing and recovery. It is probably not really a great idea to start dating, just because you are still in a rough place. Enjoy your time with you son, he needs you right now. You are obviously the stable parent between the two.
Gentle hugs.
The hardest part for me is that I found this trail a few years ago. It has a canal on one side and the CT river on the other. There is a bench overlooking a fork in the river about two miles out. That used to be our romantic spot to take a break when we went for walks on the weekends and especially at sunsets. She used to really kiss me there.
The pity-party part of me says - now it is their romantic spot. It really hurts.
In general, I love that trail with water on both sides and tons of wildlife, plus the eagle's nest. It was so peaceful and centering for me when I walk or ride there. Now, ... I guess I need to find someplace else to go.
I'm doing a little better around it today, but it did throw me for a loop last night and I didn't sleep much with my mind spinning. It is hard to stop that.
You are all right about not dating yet, though I do want to stop isolating and get out and do things with people. I'll just have to do them on my off weekend. I've looked on meetup and not found anything around me yet, but I'll keep trying.
Thank you again for the support.