I just joined this group and don't know if this is the right place...but here goes:

My relationship has been seriously strained for a very long time...and I keep trying to keep it together and make it work...the problem is that he's not working on it, helping, or even trying...

He is an addict...he has stolen from me, cheated on me, lied to me, done everything possible but physically abuse me...and stupid me puts up with it...

We go through very painful and costly issues...alone....we don't talk to anyone about it...and it's just growing, and festering...and getting worse...

I have tried everything and just don't know what to do anymore...

Because of his addication, i have come to realize that he is two different people...I call them Him #1 and Him #2...I deeply love and care for both of them...but i don't like Him#2 very much...I really don't. Him #2 is the addict, the one who does all this crap to me...and unfortunately HIM #2 is the one who has been here for at least the last 18 months...

and this last saturday...just completely killed me...I went on a Spring Break Mission Trip...and he decided to go out on Saturday night and do whatever it is he did...and when he got caught he just lied about it!!!! Totally and completely lied and continues to lie about it even though I've proved to him that i know he's lying!!!

and i think that is one of the things that has me so angry right now...it's all the lies and lying..

he does it to me, his boss, his family, everyone!!!!! and I just can't take it no more!

I love him...and I don't lose him...but I don't know how much more of this I can take...

-DepressedRecluse-