Sorry. That is difficult. I was with someone with Asperger's and ultimately it did not work out. He was very tunnel vision with what he wanted, and selfish, self absorbed. My feelings soon did not matter at all to his decisions, even if his decisions directly affected me. He did not blame his actions on Asperger's, sometimes he didn't think he did anything wrong! So, I can sympathize with what you're going through.

However, I think it depends on many things. How severe does your guy have it?

Has he had successful relationships in the past?

Has he had any therapy or medications for it?

hugs my friend is all I can say. But is it really all Asperger or is it him taking advantage of it.

Hi thanks for reply. He was not diagnosed with aspergers, I worked out he had it within a month or two of knowing him, and I am a qualified established therapist. He cannot see how it matters, he insists we all have faults and so what?! He would not try to take advantage of it. He gets very upset when we fall out or whatever. He would do anything to avoid it, but he finds it impossible to talk about feelings. Or talks nonsense when he tries. Like your ex he cannot see what he has done wrong very often. So if I am cooking a meal and he starts to tell me how to peel the potatoes and how to stir the gravy etc, he really thinks he is advising me and its helpful. We were together for years before he moved in and because of the lock down and him not working and being here a lot more it got worse and worse. Partly because he has this need to control everything, partly because he knows he has all the answers and must always know better - but he cannot see that this is criticism and nit picking or interfering. I bought a mobility scooter and was very nervous about going out on it. He came with me and would shout at me that I am going too fast or too slow and all the rest. It took all of the pleasure out of it and I didnt want to go anymore. Ive pointed out to him that he must stop thinking he knows everything and I know nothing. He looks very puzzled then and cannot connect the two. Please dont suggest he get an official diagnosis. Pointless. He is 65, he cannot afford the time and money to travel miles each time - nor the time off of work unpaid - and it woudlnt change him at all. He would not benefit from medication. If any of that might have been useful we would have sorted it years ago. I can explain all of this to him in great detail and it wont change it. He would not listen to a stranger at all. He would just agree with them and then ignore it when he leaves their office. In the meantime he has lost his business and income while he goes there. Making the rest of his life worse and this part no better.

His first wife left him - he has no idea why -I am sure it is about this. His second wife was very physically disabled and in a wheelchair so I think she had no choice but to stay with him and make do. She died.

I am not wanting advice on how to handle him or what he is like etc, I am qualified , I have known him for many years, I am here because it is hard to adjust to things changing and how life is then.

Sorry to hear your pain, and hurt. You are not married and it is ok to back out for your own healthy and well being.

Hi. I realise I can back out. But would not have chosen to be with him for years of he was not the one. I am fine single. But he is actually the best man I have ever met - more honest, kind, considerate etc. He came around last night begging me to stay with him.

Update. This guy begged me to stay with him. Just as Rosemary Price psychic had predicted when I had a phone reading with her recently. She told me that he is very cut up about upsetting me. Of course many people have no idea of what aspergers is or give you stupid advice such as "tell him to stop doing that" - which is like telling a person with Tourettes Syndrome to stop shouting out swear words.

I am not willing to go through all of the details, it is nobody elses business. But I certainly do not need advice.

If it annoys me when he thinks I need advice why would I need it from others? How many people here can run a busy business with hundreds of staff single handedly?

I know what I am doing it and why, and I know it is for the best for me, I don't need others to agree with me.

But sometimes it feels good to have a rant or share it.

I have been here a short time and already I have been targeted by various scammers - who think they can ask me for money and pretend it is a relationship, and others who just want to moan and groan all the time,
a real friendship is not just about leaning on someone when you feel down, it is about having things in common and sharing the good times and socialising, then if you feel down you turn to your real friends. You do not only turn to them when they are useless and ignore them the rest of the time.

One of the things I picked up from my reading with Rosemary Price psychic recently is that we all have bad days, it is ridiculous to say oh dear I am having a bad day so that must mean I must end my advantageous long term relationship of many years. A bright person says hang on, if he is so terrible how come she chose him and how come she stuck with him for so many years.

It is obvious that if the woman has a lucrative business and earns a very good living she is not a gold digger and not financially reliant on him so it must be something else.

You just need to think and use your brains a bit.

sounds complicated.

Most things are complicated. What many do not understand or grasp is that nobody asked them for their opinion or advice. Sometimes people go onto forums or groups just to sound off and let off steam and share, not because the other person is more knowledgeable and wise and can see what you cannot.
This is a very strange site. So far been bombarded with men who are clearly wanting to do the romance scams, and others who are clearly just wanting to have me at their beck and call to listen to them goon about their problems all day. Neither of those are genuinely seeking friends.