Breakups & Divorce Support Group

Just broke up with someone or in the midst of a difficult divorce? Breaking up is difficult no matter what the circumstances are. They say that time heals all wounds, but sometimes a listening ear or a hug can work wonders for the heart. Whether you need a place to vent, someone to hold you to No Contact, or need advice about what to do, we're here to help.

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Mixed signals...........it's so confusing!!!!!

playerapr
playerapr
Hubby is deeply entangled in an emotional affair, to the point he says he is in love with this other female and can't stop thinking about her. Finally cut of all communication with her but we have discussed divorce. He is still at the house and getting ready to leave in about 10 days in his 5th tour overseas, he will be gone for a year. Valentines day comes around and I'm not expecting anything since he don't even say I love you to me anymore but he surprises me with an edible arrangement and chocolates!!!!!! Agghhhhh....what to do? how to feel? He haven't been emotionally invested in our marriage for about a year but we do get along great, we talk , we have fun, we spent time together, he even claims to still love me but not been in love, he claims to be confused. How long can I keep doing this? My family and friends tell me to kick him to the curve but I'm not ready,I don't have the strenght to move on and let go. Even though it would have hurt it would have been easier if he just walked away and told me to go to hell!!! Aggghhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh!!!!!! Sometimes I just want to scream!!!
Community LeaderMid
Mid
No. Stay strong! I'm thrilled that you were surprised by his actions. All is not lost in the relationship. You pinned the tail on the main problem by the fact that he did NOT walk away!
Make him work for the solution since you still have a strong foundation for a marriage commitment. It takes a long time to recover the balance after en "emotional affair", however, since you made it this far, hand in hand, hang in there, it will get better!
Keep venting, it helps you remember that there are good things in the midst of all the drama you are dealing with now.
deleted_user
deleted_user
My stbx used the cliche "I love you but im not in love with you"

Oestonee gave me a bunch of links but this one I loved!

http://www.dailystrength.org/groups/welcome-to-bud/discussions/messages/11283492
deleted_user
deleted_user
He doesn't seem to know what he wants, or maybe he wants to know for certain that this other relationship will work and be what he wants before he leaves his family. It is unfair to everyone, he needs to go for counselling, his focus should be on the family that he has and not on some woman that he thinks he may be in love with, an emotional relationship that was started under circumstances that at best were stressful.
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