no!
i am the worst one for breakingNC but it wont make you feel better.
my guess is...... its the saturday night before xmas he rung to see if you were in moping about... instead you were out! He wants a reaction from you. Try not to give him that. You text now he ll know you are home and you are alone. Believe me he ll feel worst if you ignore that message as he will never know what time you got in and if you were with anyone!

I agree!

I have the problem that my ex lives a block away, so I run into him all the time, but he never speaks to me, only e-mails.

I also have the problem of pissing him off. My finances are great, his aren't. Since he let, I've replaced a toilet, water heater, snow blower, stove and garage door. Some of these were things that needed before the divorce, they were actually included in legal documents, but it really didn't matter, I could affored it.

Other than the fact I have a boyfriend who does everything I can't, I became friends with my neighbors, with whom could have cared less before - I tend to lose my boyfriend over there for some drinks. I always wanted a hot tub, my ex always said no, so I just recently bought one.

My ex hated me having a life, pushed all my friends away, and now I'm getting them back. My friend and I just took a week long trip to Puerto Rico, that has been planned since March. My ex claimed to have no knowledge, but he went out for drinks with my friends ex in April, and they discussed the trip.

My opinion, men don't want to see women survive. They don't want to see us having fun, they want us to beg them back. I know my ex thought that my boyfriend would abandon me, or I would leave him.

If my ex only knew things my boyfriend talked me into, he'd have a fit. I told my friend some of them during our trip, and she was amazed. He has taken me places like a nude beach, a strip club, a few porn shops, etc. They all showed the trust we have in each other, something I never had with my ex.

no especially not a mean text. So he never see the kids at all? I feel bad for your kids:(

Thanks ya'll.. I've resisted it so far & I'm going to try not to give him a reaction..
Serenity, he is military so hes always gone.. He only sees the kids when hes home on leave which is a couple weeks at a time & only once or twice per year.. He has never had a christmas with the kids.. Last year he was deployed. I feel sorry for them too. I hate seeing them hurt.. :'(

Nope....nothing.....give him nothing....no call no text......he already knows he's an ass.......Im sure he doesn't need reconfirming of it! He probably will expect that.....but, he ain't worth it......just make the best of it! :) Glad you had fun!!!!

UUUGGGHHHHH.... Its soooooo hard! I want to rip his head off... I want to bury him... I really feel like txting him & giving him a piece of my mind.. I know ya'll are right and that he's probably trying to get a reaction out of me like always & I shouldnt give him one... its just so hard not to say anything!! The more I think about it the more anxious I'm getting.. I need to get out of this house.. maybe go for a walk or take the kids to the park.. I HATE to see my kids disappointed... Why does this have to be so annoyingly difficult??

It's good to want to rip his head off but do not worry. He is doing that all by himself. I suspect your children will always love their father but they will trust you. You provide love, trust, security and much much more.

The disappointment they feel now is difficult to watch but it is necessary for them to see clearly in the future. I am sorry it is happening to you and your family.

Unless he is court mandated to see your kids via visitation - keep the kids away from him. That is so wrong on so many levels and if he hurts them once, by breaking promises, he will do it again.

Let him talk to the kids, then cut his ass off. That is what I'm doing and so far so good. The kids understand why I changed my number to not even have to deal with the bs. He will have to take me to court to see them. I'm done with the games. Good luck!!

No call, no text. Hell I'd even probably ignore him if he calls back. You make the choice to pick up the phone and you don't owe him a damn thing.

Don't do it. It will just make you feel bad.

Kourtney, don't text, he wants you to. He knows you are a good mother and you want to keep a sense of normalcy where your children are concerned so he's intentionally being a deadbeat dad to piss you off.

Sometimes silence is the best revenge. Never let your enemy know what you think; it keeps them on their toes.

My ex did the same, I never called and then he started calling more and I never returned the calls.

Soooo... instead of texting him, I went & vented to my mom and then called my closest friend and vented to her.. They both agreed I shouldnt give him a reaction and that it might even hurt him that I dont care if he comes for christmas or not & that I'm not begging him to come or anything like that, which is probably what he wants... After venting, I took the kids to the park and the library.. I got a bunch of books to help keep my mind occupied..
@jewels.. Our court papers say I have full physical and legal custody and that he may see the kids when he can (cuz of military duty) in my county only. It also says I am not allowed to change my number without notifying him and I have to let him talk to the kids on the phone. So when he calls I let them answer and when he says "Let me talk to your mother" I hang up.. And this is the third time he has promised to come see them and then cancelled.
Its crazy to me that someone could repeatedly let their kids down. His mom left his family when he was like 3 or 4 and used to promise to come see him and then cancel. She doesnt even call him on his birthday. You would think he would understand how his kids feel and not want to put them through the same thing he went through... IDK.

you are probably right, he's doing this on purpose.. He knows it hurts me to see my kids hurt.. Weve been through this before..

I feel you. I know how hard it is to control the anger. But you know what? It is over. It really is. And all that matters is that you surround yourself with the love that does exist and keep walking with your head high away from the love that wasn't. Let it be. Let it go. Direct your anger toward making your life and children's life amazing.

thank you.. I wish it wasnt so hard :'(