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I don't know how to date! It's been 20 yrs!

happywannab
happywannab
Ok I freely admit it, I need help (in many ways) but this is about dating! I don't know the right way to go about things. I am finally in a healthy place where I think I am ready to move forward. I know NOT to look for love. I know NOT to force a fit or settle. I know who I am and I can't or won't change so someone has got to fit me. Please help I want to hear from men and women, pls. Here is the situation. I had a man call me about a month ago. He was given my name by a previous business associate. He called me just to get Mortgage help. We hit it off on the phone and I was able to help him. He offered to take me for a drink to "thank me". I said sure sometime. End of conversation. He called the next week, wanted to go on Tuesday. I said sure then Tues. came, I was tired so I called asked for a rain check (never thought I would really like him, never crossed my mind). We went back and forth for a month. He never gave up. I must have blown him off 4 times. We finally made it out this Wed.. Oh My, cutie, sweet, funny. I liked him! I think he liked me too. He joked about me blowing him off for so long, I said at least I am not clingy or desprate. He said no you just don't give a shi*! It went well. He asked about my weekend (I already had plans so I told him so). I did really but not sure if he bought it or thought I was still avoiding him. We had a nice little kiss at the end of our date. I said had a good time & hope we do it again. He called next day to thank me and said he was just "checking in" but did not ask for another date? Now what. I like him! Do I call him, ask him out? Do I just wait and see, if so how long? Help, I want a chance at this one, want to play it right! I can mess up a one car funneral!!
happywannab
happywannab
Update, The ass actually called tonight. He just chit chated at first then he asked if I had a good time last night? I said sure up till the time you started putting me down and being rude! He said oh no, what did I say? He said he knew something happened he remembered me chewing him a new asshole! He claims he had a bit too much Tequila. He said note to self don't drink tequila on a date! I said whatever it is like truth serum! He was very apologetic. I said I though you liked me, found me attractive and we were having fun. He said all of that was true this time telling me how pretty I was without any "big" comments! I told him it was too late. Our ship had sailed and that I wouldn't want him to lower his standards and date a fluffy girl! He listened to me go on and said he was very sorry he had hurt my feelings asked me to forgive him. I said he was forgiven but it would not be forgotten. I told him to have a good night then he said OK I'll talk to you in a day or so and he hung up. WTF?? I sure know how to pick em!!
deleted_user
deleted_user
Good for you!!!!!!!! Let him come back and I will stick a BOB in his mouth for ya....tequila my ass! Then finding an easy way out? JERK. A good guy that made an honest mistake would ask what he could do to make up for it. Tale between his legs? hmmmmm....let crap pass you by!!! GOOD JOB!!! WOhoooooo
deleted_user
deleted_user
He is the shithead of the week.

Are you going to date anyone else soon?
happywannab
happywannab
Of course I am going to keep dating Maggie, if nothing else it is entertainment! One asshole won't spoil the whole bunch! Even though he was an ass, I still had a good time up to the point of the comment. Then I had fun chewing him out. And he paid for it all (in more ways than one!), so I still win!!
deleted_user
deleted_user
A total and complete ass!

I'm glad he didn't scare you off.

I can't wait to hear about your next date! I hope it is fantabulous!
deleted_user
deleted_user
See the goods in it, though, made you feel real sexy for a while and kicking was just as fun, a little grief, but all and all it boosted your self esteem to feel desired, and boosted your self esteem to kick a good looking guy...yes, baby, YOU ROCK!!!!!! Wohooooo.
happywannab
happywannab
Thanks Katie, I don't scare easily! I lived through divorce!! and a broken heart from "rebound guy". None of it killed me so it made me stronger, as the saying goes. I get more determined each day not to be used or mistreated ever again! There are good men still in the world! Proof of that on here. I would mention names but I would surely miss someone and be in trouble! They know who they are and we do too!
deleted_user
deleted_user
I am so happy for you! It is a wonderful thing that you acknowledge you don't have to settle. I did that, and boy did I ever learn the hard way. Sadly, I have to own the desperation card too. But I will not make that mistake again! No one can save us but us.

Follow your feelings. He called you to check in, so that means the date went well. He also kissed you once the date was over, so that too means the date went well. He probably didn't ask you again because he knew you had plans for the weekend.

Give it a couple of days, and take a tad bit of iniative(he has to know you are interested too)! and suggest a get together.

And, take it from there!
happywannab
happywannab
Starting, I think you missed the actual date. You have to go back and read what actually happened. I have no desire to go out with HIM again. I love it that he still wants me though. Thanks for your sweet words but I do think you missed the middle of the story.