No, there's no requirement you have to be angry or hate him. It really just depends on why you broke up. Some couples simply drift apart or decide mutually that they not longer want to be together. In those situations, there's no need to hate the other person or be angry. On the other hand, in most breakups one person wants it and the other doesn't. So naturally, the one who doesn't want it is going to be angry because it is something that was forced upon them and they had no choice in the matter.

I left my stbx but I hold him responsible for the breakdown of our marriage (okay, maybe not 100% - more like 90/10 or 80/20) and I do feel some anger at him about this. But I don't hate him, we are still 'friendly', we talk nearly every day. I just don't want to be married to him any longer.

Here here. I love my hubby and he too is a great guy. he has his faults and he's made some mistakes that cost us our family. For all of those reasons I am sad. He was my bestfriend and I miss him so much. He has his moments when he hates my guts because I won't give us the green light. Unfortunately, love just ain't enough.

My ex was a wonderful father and husband for twenty years....The last 7 he "fell off the wagon" as my son puts it.

mine was a grat husband wonderful father, good provider - he has decided he only loves me as a friend after 20 years - hard to take - I honestly wish I could hate him right now so that it would be easier to move on...not the case. Trying to move on, have good moments and bad moments - just wish I didn't care as much as I do right now

I have found that having been left by the same person twice it is a lot easier to hate them, then to pine for them. Anger is an easier emotion to deal with, probably because I am so familiar with it. I don't know about you guys but I have found it quite easy to be angry that has left me all alone after 22+ years.

I loved my stbx with all my heart. He was my dream come true. He made some bad decisions and now we are done.

Over all my STBX is a good person. He was a good father, provider & mostly good husband. Because of his job & my depression we grew apart. Then he hit a serious mid life crisis & decided he didn't want to put the time & effort into saving what we had. Got him a new tattoo, harley & a girlfriend.

Yes, I am angry & hurt & disappointed. Even at time I think of him roasting in he**. (Just according to how mad I am as to how long I want him to roast - lightly seared to burnt to a crip) But I don't hate him. It would be easier to let go if I did but I can't. Basicly he is the same person, just extremely lost. Sometimes love is not enough.

In my case, all of my exes are some of my very best friends, except for the one who left me 4 months before our wedding! I have always been that way, if you cared enough to love someone, why should you hate them just because things didn't work out?

My wife is a lovely person. It was my personal issues that she could no longer deal with and found solace on the computer, finally leaving to be with the friend she found on-line.

My stbx is a great father an was my best friend for 12 1/2 years. I loved him dearly. He one day decided that he did not want to be with me. I still don't know why. I don't know what kind of heart he has to be able to do something like this without even giving "us" a chance but then again he was very impulsive in our marriage in terms of changing jobs and moving us around a lot an so I guess I'm not surprise that he wanted to change partners. His family has this tendency with other things sort of.

But overall he is a good person and wants to do right by our children.

My ex was my best friend, my lover and everything I could have hoped for for the first 4 years of our marriage. It was when she was getting online and got addicted to the porn, the sex forums and started cheating and lying that I started to hate her. Somewhere in that mean person now is the woman I fell in love with? But where I don't know. I don't even know if that person ever exists anymore. So I agree with Wick, the anger is easier to deal with than pining for her. I hope I ever set eyes on her again!

I am at that same spot. He isn't my ex yet, but I don't have a lot of hope he will decide to stay in our marriage. I just wish I could hate him or feel angry, but right now I just feel really sad.

well my first ex wife is and she was its just the break up was freaking rough. we both did shit to each other that wasn't nice in the preiod of time. my stbx of now is nice too but like before we are in that period where nice it;s always around. but its getting better.we are eother gonna get back together. or not.

Yes- mine is. I don't hate him. I am not scared of him. I am hurt and angry at his choices, but he is a terrific Dad, and an all-around good guy.

Sometimes, I wish I could hate him- might be easier.

I agree wih Startingover. All of my ex broyfriends are still friendly with me. I'm cool like that.