All you can really do for her is not enable her habit. Don't give her money. Feed her a meal if she comes to you to eat with you. You help her by not enabling to continue your bad habits. You may not be able to stop them, but you certainly don't have to help them either. I'm sorry you're having to go through this. Hugs.

Thank you Cheryl. I am trying to deal with 2 things here. The texts between my husband and daughter. Which was a betrayal of tad two people I love the most and my daughters drug problem. It's so hard.

It is. I don't envy your dilemma. Just take it 1 day at a time. And say the serenity prayer over and over again. Sometimes I have to repeat it a few times to myself in order for it to sink in.

My daughter was raped at the age of 14 by her friends dad. He went to prison. My daughter has had problems since. Drugs the worse problem. I took her for councilling at the time but all the councillors we were given were men. Who she couldn't talk to. She had a boyfriend who was double her age and got her on some bad drugs. He died from an overdose. The texts my husband and daughter were sending to each other were while my daughter was with this druggy man. The man and my husband hated each other because it all came out when I found the texts. They fought in the street. My daughter is now with a recovering addict.

Hi need,
People on here are so very smart. I hope you will listen to them. No matter what else, I feel that what he did is not a crime, but it should be.
No matter what age your daughter is. He should know better. It's something that goes WAY over that invisible line.
I would never trust him again and I would do everything I could do for my daughter. This man has no morals.
I wish you luck.

((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((HUGS))))))))))))))))))))))))))

I'm sorry that your are in the predicament you are in. No, no, it is not okay for your husband to engage in sexual texts. Boundaries are crossed. Sorry you are in emotional pain. The truth shall set you free.

I thank you all for your support. I need you all. I am trying so hard to deal with all this

not good today

nobody talking to me. In tears today. He came to house and was crying. I miss him so much. We talked but got nowhere. He left and my heart in bits. He is off out tonight and I haven't gone anywhere since we split. we always went out together.I feel hurt and don't know why. I think im worrying that he will meet someone else. I couldn't bear it. even tho he did what he did I cant handle any more. Tears are streaming down my face as I write this. you will all hate me now for being like this

Try to put the focus back on you instead of him. Focus your energy on you. You have done all you can for your daughter. She is an adult and has to make her own decisions and seek help when she needs it. As adults, we should all be free to travel our own paths in life, even if that path is a dead end. If I were you, I would stop having contact with this man for 30 days. Absolutely nothing. See how you feel after that. Sometimes we just need to process all that is happening in our lives, without the giver of pain continuing to inflict more pain on us. He is being very selfish by continuing to show up at your house and cry. He may feel bad for what he did, but what is he doing about it? Has he admitted his guilt? Is he getting help for his issues? What would be different if you took him back? It's easy to say whatever the other person wants to hear, but quite another to actually make amends. Take some time for you to sort out your feelings, and don't worry about his feelings for now.

went to bed early last night feeling sorry for myself. He wont admit to anything. Its like nothing has happened to him. I know I don't want him back. I have decieded that much. When I feel strong he weakens me. The awkward thing is he helped me set up my own business and paid for the machinery. I left a job to do this with pressure from him. I was unsure at the time if the business would work. I rent the shop, which is in my name. only my name is on the biusness. He now wants his name on it. I have refused because this job is now my income. He made me leave a job to do this. The shop is now established. Its not making mega bucks but its surviving as im still building it, He has a job and a flat which he owns. he had the flat before I met him and he rents it out. He is now lliving back there. I live in private rented house with my son. I have lived here 9 years been married for 4. was on my own for 10yrs before I met this man. survived on my own with my son then and cant understand why I cant now. He is demanding I put his name on my shop.and calls me mean for not sharing. If he hadn't tried to get off with my daughter and I trusted him, then there wouldn't be a problem. I don't trust him now and im scared as it is that hae will try get half the shop. I have told him leave the shop alone and I will not want anything from his flat, I am not interested in taking his flat off him and want him to leave my little business alone. even if in time I could afford to pay him back for the machinery. I am a dressmaker.

what a mess all this is.

Need a friend. I smell shit. Bullshit. He reeks of it. The longer he has to think, the more excuses he will come up with. And ya, he probly does feel ill bc he is not wanting anyone to know. Its not remorse, its shame. Big difference. Sorry that you know, not sorry he did it. Put some big boots on cuz its getting deep!

Thankyou for all your kindness. you are all such a big support . I couldn't do this without you. It helps that we all are in same boat and all understand each others pain

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