Bipolar Disorder Support Group
Bipolar disorder is not just a single disorder, but a category of mood disorders marked by periods of abnormally high energy and euphoria, often accompanied by bouts of clinical depression. This is the place to talk about your experience with bipolar disorder, learn from others' experiences, and find support.
My life is utter hell. I sit at work every day and think about ways to kill myself. I am very limited in what I could do, but it has to end. No one can help me. I tried the hospital but they were more interested in how I was gonna pay the bill than in what was wrong with me. They couldn't change my life anyway, I should be on disability but can't be because I work too many hours to qualify, It makes me so angry that others get disability when I can not, I want to die so badly, I wake up in tears every day knowing I will have to live another day. I have to kill myself. I have begged God to take me in my sleep but God doesn't care about me at all. If He did He would take me home, out if this nightmare I live in. But He doesn't care. I have to kill myself, I can't bear this existence any more. I've tried suicide hotlines but they can't change my life either. There is nothing anyone can do to help me. The only thing that would help is getting on disability so I don't have the hell of going to work to deal with, the nightmare of worrying if I'm gonna be able to pay the rent, The stress is unbearable. My pdoc won't give me anything for the anxiety. I just have to suffer. And I can't anymore. I have to kill myself, It's the only answer, I've been suffering horribly for over 50 years. Enough is enough,
-
Hey All...I hope that you have a lovely, peaceful beginning of your weekI have a bunch of chores that need doing but may put them off til tomorrow and just hang out with my landlord/roomie todayWhat about you?...Anything special going on?Have a great day and take good care of you!!..Xo
-
Once again I've had a fever today. I'm not going to the hospital because that's a huge waste of time but I did schedule a dr appointment for Wednesday afternoon.
Can you please go back to the hospital? You need to tell them (again) just how seriously you need the help. Tell billing to shove it. I'm so worried about you dear, and because of what you described above I really think that you need to go to the hospital. I don't think anything outpatient will be enough help. Call 911 if you think that the hospital will admit you more readily from the ambulance, than just walking into the ER.
Please keep us updated. You're going to be on my mind all day.
-Sadie
I've heard that in the US a lot of people have to apply for disability more then once unfortunately...
That really sux for those who need it
There are lawyers that specialize it this sweetie and I imagine that they can get a lot further then the average person... Apply again... Do it with an attorney... I would guess that they get paid by taking off a small part of the disability a month until their bill's paid off
God knows what's around the corner and we do not... You are still here for a reason sweetie... I don't know what that it however I'm glad that you're here... Please hang on....Here's my hand
Call a crisis centre if you need help or 911... There is good help to be had
Great big hug hug of comfort for you and a blessing..xo
I just thought it was part of a pdoc's job to file. I guess not from what I read. But if a pdoc has a good track record with SS I bet the process is much quicker. If you try to work a lot of hours but can't because of BP maybe that is taken into consideration. I hope you don't quit trying because you deserve disability and BP can be manageable with the lack of job stress - in fact downright enjoyable
Ask your pdoc to file or refile and if the answer is no, find one who will. ((hugs)).
Have you called a disability attorney?
I did and found it comforting. There are options. Put your ducks in a row but think outside the box.
thinking my best thoughts for you today.
-Ma
I know you struggle, and how you just keep plodding along.
But there has to be a way to settle this Disability thing.
I know when I was in my deepest blackest depression , feeling like I had no option but suicide... a friend finally convinced me to re-apply for disability.
I wouldn't have been able to think clearly enough to do it myself.
PLEASE reconsider disability.
Go to your County Social Services...see a Social Worker....
Sending my deepest regards and hugs
dd
By forcing yourself to work you are only perpetuating the fact that you can work. I suggest you take your leave of your job, use your paycheque to get yourself where I, and many of us here, know you would rather be.
Take advantage of any charity you can find there or check yourself into a hospital and work your way to disability from there.
You can do this if it's something you really want. Just get out of the hell you are living now...and take your life in a new direction. Buses leave daily...pick a date and be on it.
Quit your job if you can't stand another day of it and demand payment. Forget about any obligations you may have there. Your only obligation is to your own self.
You have your friends here, for now that is all you need to get you where you're going. (((BIGBEARHUGS)))
You can pm me if you like and I'll listen and help you problem-solve. Believe me,the help you're crying out for is there to be had. In my experience,just when you feel you can't take anymore,help arrives just in time.
God bless
I wanted you to know you are in my thoughts and prayers. Please reach out for help where you can get it - attorney, hospital, mental health advocate.
YOU deserve to have a comfortable life. That is my prayer for you. Big hugs and love for you.
If your pdoc will not give you anything for the anxiety see if you can have a family practice doctor prescribe something for you. I've worked for doctors for over 20 years and most will give you something.
I truly hope you find something in your life to make life worth living for because you are a kind hearted person who deserves to find happiness and peace.
I will keep you in my thoughts and send positive energy your way.
HUGS
I know you have tried a lot of the options people are suggesting and found them unhelpful.
I fear that you struggling and forcing yourself to work is counting against you in your disability application. Yet as you say, quitting work and being homeless is an even worse option.
I'm sorry you are so stuck and feel trapped. I'm out of suggestions so all I can offer is a hug and to let you know I wish I could do more.