A few words now and again is enough to help me understand the percieved chaos of my life. It helps me make the concious decision that despite the complicated, busy, buzzy, and anoying things there is clarity.

I had chili for dinner. My wife made chili. I've been married for almost four years, and my wife will still go out of her way to make dinner for us both. We went for a walk after dinner, and then it started raining. We ran home. I've known my wife for almost ten years. I believe in love at first site, but I had to wait through two other relationships to make room in our lives to be together. I didn't know it at the time. We celebrate our anniversary this Thursday. I usually do the cooking.

Sometimes I forget to check in. I get carried away somewhere. Most of the time I don't realize it. Even on meds my moods are very fluid and at times intense. Everyday is therapy. It's easier if its everyday. Therapy for me is reminding myself of the good things. I write them down or ricite them. It's proof that I still have the power of choice. And this is enough.

Bipolar disorder is not easy for either of us, and we've learned to be ok with that. Still it's the dooryway to my center; recognizing the good and the bad together. It helps to put down a few words like this, now and again, to keep it in perspective.

There is so much that I refrain from saying to keep this peace of mind. There is so much that does not need to be said. And still this kind of reminder is helpful.