Yes, this is a safe place to express your thoughts. If it is a possible trigger that might upset someone just put a big TW at the start of your post and then people have the choice to read or not to read without judgement. The Bipolar mind tells many lies and we all hear them and it is absolutely ok to come to this support group and express them.
I have had two MOH's procedures on my face and while uncomfortable, the healing is usually good and Basal Cell Carcinomas are quite easily dealt with. It takes a long time for them to go deep (I had one on my lower leg too which left me with a nice dent) but they are cancers which can be cut out usually with few complications and rarely kill. Aqueous cell carcinoma is a little more serious and can be surgically difficult and Melanoma is the most serious and more difficult to deal with.
I would say get your GP to prescribe a couple of ativan and a good pain killer to take before and after and it makes the whole thing a hell of a lot easier to deal with. Arnica tablets too (pharmacy of health food store) are incredibly good for healing surgical procedures faster.
I wish you luck with it, you may get a shock right after it when you see the wound but MOH's is microscopic surgery and leave little or no scarring.
I hope it goes well for you. Keep us posted on how it goes.
The passive suicidal ideation, you can talk to your Pdoc about and maybe you need a med tweak.
sending you some good healing energy and hugs to get through this safely without too much pain. The good think about surgery is that each day it feels better and better so try to focus on that may the healing time pass quickly for you.

I have been there too, Drake. My mother died of colorectal cancer. My mom's sister – my aunt – also developed colon cancer but it was caught early. My mother's uncle died from a stroke but he also had colon cancer. On my mom's side the family it runs strong. I am also a greater risk because my last colonoscopy at age 46 found a polyp that could turn cancerous within 5 years. I have not had a colonoscopy since. I've been thinking if I developed cancer, I would not have been treated and when symptoms are too much, medical assistance in dying is legal in Canada. If they are having me wait longer than I want to, I will go to Switzerland where it is available to foreign travellers. I have already made email contact with them, but have not signed up. I am planning on going back to my physical rehabilitation Dr. and if she can help me reduce the pain and increase the function of my hands, wrists, and arms, my life would be worth living and I would be getting my colonoscopy regularly as well as mammograms and Pap tests. My husband is seeing my family doctor this Wednesday and we are requesting a referral for me to go back to Dr. W., Physiatrist (not psychiatrist). The online psychiatrist he people were away on vacation too often in the customer service was not worth paying $360 an hour so I did not do it. Mentally I've been doing very well lately with midday light therapy. I'm also going off some meds because I developed a milder moderate case of serotonin syndrome. I am still fighting and I am looking forward to seeing Dr. W again.