Bipolar Disorder Support Group

Bipolar disorder is not just a single disorder, but a category of mood disorders marked by periods of abnormally high energy and euphoria, often accompanied by bouts of clinical depression. This is the place to talk about your experience with bipolar disorder, learn from others' experiences, and find support.

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is this part of bi polar

sweetpea222
sweetpea222
my partner is bi polar .she has had quite a few relationships before me. they all finished with her for the same reason ,being lazy around the house. when i first met her ,her flat was a mess the floor filled with empty take away packets,her cats litter trays full etc. i have been with her for just over 4 years and she has only washed up a few dishes about 4 times in this time. and if there isn't a clean cup she says i should had washed up instead of doing something else like yesterday when i tried to get some gardening done. she stays up till early morning watching tv or playing pc games then sleeps most of the day. yesterday i did say something when she moaned there was no clean cups. but i got her usual "my bi polar is unstable" i have a mental illness to so i'm finding it hard . i learnt some things about bi polar at my mental health group as most of the women was bi polar. but not one of them said not doing any housework at all was part of it. i'm in limbo because if it is part of her bi polar then i just have to get on with it,but if it isn't i need to make changes. also it is almost impossible to get her to go out with me unless it's something she wants to do.she says she needs to be in safe surroundings ,refuses to even go into a pub with me yet a friend invited her to her birthday in a pub for a few drinks and she said yes. when i reminded her of her problem with pubs she said it was ok her other friends was going to be there she felt safe in a group.her excuse aswell is she doesnt like pubs because of drunk men. but my neighbour came round the other week her husband had got drunk and violent. but then my partner went round to him. there was 2 drunk men in the take away one went to hug my partner and she just hugged him back the other one was getting nasty but instead of getting out fast she stayed because she wanted her take away. so you can probably understand my dilemma here. basically i'm asking is my partner using her bi polar as a excuse when she doesn't want to do things. but if it is her bi polar how can i help her?
electropro176
electropro176
I'm bipolar, among other things. It appears that your partner may be having trouble with depression and agoraphobia/anxiety [fear of leaving safety of the home]. It's entirely possible that she may not have the energy to clean up her living environment. When I'm in the depressive part of bipolar, just getting out of the bed in the morning is a challenge. Have you tried couples counseling with your partner to determine if there are other factors that could be effecting her ability to function on a day to day basis? Not sure if this is helpful to you or not, hope it is.
Community Leaderacuriousfish
acuriousfish
If it's constant it's not bipolar because bipolar is episodic.
bbipolar
bbipolar
I take so much medication that I never have the energy to get out of bed. I often wash my dishes the morning after. I am fairly neat, but I hate to dust and vacumn. I do it when it's obvious that my computer table is full of dust. My mother was obsessive compulsive and demanded we wash every dish as used and then put it away. She was so bad that she wouldn't go to bed at night until everything in the house was sparkling. She called me messy, when I was just more relaxed about "obsessive neatness" For God's sake she used to unscrew the lightbulbs and was them with soap and water. I don't have OCD, but I grew to hate all her obsessive cleaning. As I said I take (many of do) meds that make us sleepy all day.
spacekat
spacekat
I'm just plain lazy sometimes and don't feel like cleaning. But that's not bipolar talking - just me.
Community LeaderSunCloudJD
SunCloudJD
It sounds like she's talking out of both sides of her mouth... She'll go out when she feels like it

Bipolar is episodic as fish wrote... So there can an episode of a high followed by a crash which is when most people find that they can't function as they normally would however 4 years isn't an episode it's a lifestyle ...

There is a Friends and Family of Bipolar board here as well
Community LeaderSunCloudJD
SunCloudJD
Friends and Family of Bipolar

http://www.dailystrength.org/c/Family-and-Friends-of-Bipolar/support-group
Carolin57
Carolin57
Some days I barely have the energy to get out of bed and into the shower but other days I do.

I do clean the house when I have the energy but sometimes my husband has to do it.

He makes me write a list when I am depressed of three things to do during a day. One can be just to get up or another could be to wash the dishes. When I am depressed I try hard but can't always manage it.

But it never lasts and my energy will come back at some level after a while.
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