BTW I was awake for several days years ago and I was put on Perphenazine to bring me down and it worked pretty quickly and without any discomfort.....xo

Hey Thor,
I'm sorry you are going through this. I've been going through some manic episodes and they are the worst. It's good that you have strategies in place for when you are in that condition. I've never heard of a PDoc not getting back to you at least within a couple of hours! I'd hate to suggest maybe getting one with a better response time? I'm not sure of the situation but I'm just shocked that your PDoc and your TDoc haven't gotten back to you.

Olive Olive - I am also. This shakes my faith in individuals. A patient in mania with a history of doing bad illegal things while in mania reaches out. nothing. Very disheartened.

Sun Cloud - I wrote down the drug. I guess I should show up and demand to be seen tomorrow. But what can he do that he didn't on today? Still pissed at both of them. Called and email. Nothing. Is this not important? Should I keep this to myself? If it was important or dangerous, someone would I said something. I mean I hired these professionals that know about this. I'm just at ground zero. narf.

I was in the psych ward due to a severe manic just lost time money spent and i never thought about bipolar disorder and did not see my doctor for almost a year i also overdosed in lithium because i lost track of time it seemed to be time to take meds

i was in the dark for so long that my eyes were sensitive to light and i was blinded by sun outside i was in default of a student loan and had just lost my job that i had 10 yrs on i understand mania but now have hypomania most of the time i try to not do anything that can send me up higher ike i said be aware and beware

Bywena - I locked up my wallet (car purchase, almost) and keys (seeing how fast the car will go or trying to run people off the road). Also, there are the adult entertainments that can be had downtown. I am trying to be good, but these two docs are not freaking helping. I wonder, why not. It won't hurt, and who am I really hurting if I have some fun. If I do go into the doc will he want to lock me up? That would be bad and I do not think there is a fix to this. I am broken in the depression and the mania.

Yeah, really, sounds like So much fun, but I have to agree with OlderC and SunCloud...if your pdoc is unavailable you really ought to make a trip to the ER or Urgent Care to see about the mania.

I haven't been manic since 2014 and - sad to say - that's a Good thing. Loved the energy and things that I got done, but I paid a hefty price.

And I sounded a lot like you when manic, in that I was Sure I still had a handle on things.

I didn't.

Go to the ER Thor.

This is a heck of a lot of strain you're putting on the ol' ticker. Go before those reckless temptations overweight the fear and you end up FUBAR'd.

In your non-manic state, keeping the mental illness under the radar is extremely important to you (as it is to me too). You speak about the shame and stigma you feel when it goes above radar. So this is your chance to quietly slip down to the hospital, talk to a doctor, and get a benzodiazepam or other med that'll gently help you down.

Sorry to be a buzz-kill. If I didn't give a shit about you, I wouldn't say anything.

You did the right thing reaching out to the walrus, but he frankly let you down. So find the next nearest doc who can help you.

I'm right there with Olderperson and SunCloud.
You are no spring chicken, neither am I.

Perhaps your next hike should be taking you to the ER before you crash on the ground.

Hey Spencer, hope you've at least stopped taking the Stimulant and any thing like caffeine that hops you up. I also hope you consider going to the ER and getting checked out. They won't do a psych admit just because you're manic, but you could probably use a Cardiac check and perhaps get something to help you sleep and calm down a few levels and make sure your not dehydrated.

Everybody here cares about you and just wants you to be safe and okay.

Take care.
Kat

Folks - I am not taking the stimulent anymore. Last for that was Thursday morning. Trying to stay away from coffee, but I am a naval officer and I can drink a whole pot and then goto sleep right afterward. So that is not an issue.

See an ER. They will lock my butt up. I can't take three days to weeks on the inside. They can't give me anything that will work as what I need is full sedation and they are not going to let me sleep for 12 hours in their ER, and while I am drugged they will ask me things. Like do I want to kill myself and I will, unfortunately, tell the truth. I need to learn to STFU at times. I do not trust myself or them. I was involuntarily hospitalized and it was traumatizing, I won't go through that again. I still think of those four days. I lied to get out because they weren't going to help and I did not want the consequences of my act. The original act was to be well beyond their jurisdiction, wife found me too early. Mistake.

So I sent a bitchy text to the TDoc, she called back. Not sure she understands that I am in mania and not a product of my shame (for now at least). She says she didn't see the text sent at 0800 and she uses her phone constantly, even during the sessions. I do not believe her. she never mentioned hospital so I guess this is not that bad as I think it is. If I needed to be in the ER, she would have said so or called the ambulance. PDoc never called, left a message to call. Sent him an email. Nothing. Is this the same? How do I attract these docs. If they came back with Calm the F down, that at least would be some communications. With nothing, you fill in the blanks with your brand of crazy.

Well your speaking rationally and making perfect sense, so that's good.

Your Tdoc's always sounded a bit "trippy" in my opinion, so that doesn't surprise me. Like I said, they don't tend to lock you up for being Manic, your not a danger to yourself, the engine is just running at full-speed with the throttle jammed.

The thing your Pdoc might be able to do is adjust your med dosage, your Mood Stabilizer's being adjusted might get this Ep. to end sooner rather than later. I'm not over concerned about the Manic Ep., like you said, it's your pattern, I'm more concerned with your Cardiac Health. I'm glad you stopped the Stimulant.

Instead of physical activity try doing cognitive activity to burn some of the energy. Play brain games on the computer, fast paced ones. Making your mind run at a fast pace can burn the energy just as well without causing your ticker too much stress. You can also increase your Melatonin and eat foods higher in Triptan to naturally make your body calm down, safely.

I'd call your Pdoc in the morning when his office opens and keep bugging him until he gets that there is a problem.

Hang in there.
Kat

Good to no stimulants!

Kat is right there again!
Heart check and hydration check...
NO psy crap...just Medical concern.

thor, your opening post has become more and more manic. i agree with the others, it is definitely time to get yourself to the hospital. what meds are you on? did you try calling your pdoc again or your GP? all this exercise/cleaning etc is not doing your heart any favours. Have you any family or friends who could come and stay with you? try doing some meditation and progressive muscle relaxation instead of racing all over the place and lock away the booze. alcohol + not eating + mania = big trouble.
and please keep posting.

PCM. Didn;t think about that. Let me try that.. I also hve been a lot of PS4 and the same as a lot of puzzles. My clearning just upsets the wife as I wkae jer ip;.