Bipolar Disorder Support Group

Bipolar disorder is not just a single disorder, but a category of mood disorders marked by periods of abnormally high energy and euphoria, often accompanied by bouts of clinical depression. This is the place to talk about your experience with bipolar disorder, learn from others' experiences, and find support.

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Concerned for both my son and myself

jfulk
jfulk

Hello all. As usual, I'm here when I need to type and air things out to people that I know have an understanding. I am BP2 and it has been well-managed for years. Part of my struggles are that depression is triggered easily if routine changes, and if life's problems pop up. I am now feeling very upset. I am feeling hopeless because of my son. He's 13 and is exhibiting signs of mood disorder. Irrational plans to leave in the middle of the night where he doesn't seem to recognize the danger, or feels that he could avoid the danger. He almost ran away from his mother's house last week having been triggered by her from something very minor. He's had an intake with a counseling agency, but we are needing med management for sure. 


I blame myself for passing on this awful burden to him. Maybe it's just teenage hormones, but I really don't think so. the worst part from last night is that he's only upset that he got caught. He doesn't feel remorse. His statement was that he wanted to do something dangerous and exciting. 


I'm upset with his poor choice (fortunately he was caught before he began to try to go through with the plan, but he was almost out the door) but I'm even more concerned for his mental health. Selfishly, I am also concerned about my own. 


Thanks for being there everyone. :( 

Thor2008
Thor2008
Get him to a Psych for meds and therapist to find out what is going on. BP can be inherited. I got mine from my mother. If he is showing shows and actions of a mood disorder, it would be best to get him to a doc. Does your wife understand what might be going on and how to spot the warning signs?
Sunshinegirl0228
Sunshinegirl0228
I feel your pain. That’s one reason why I don’t want children. There is a strong history of bipolar in my family.
I agree get him into counseling and to a psychiatrist. It’s good that you are catching this early but sad at the same time.
Best wishes to you and yours.
Xoxoxo kisses
jfulk
jfulk
I realize there's a greater likelihood that he may have a mood disorder. That's a big part of what's got me really worried. He's had an initial intake, but I'm trying to make sure that we get in to see a psych asap. It's clear that we're going to need med management.

My wife is a counselor, so she's been very understanding and supportive.
Community LeaderSunCloudJD
SunCloudJD
13 is a difficult age..... I agree to have his see a psych if possible that works with adolescents

It's hard to know until he's seen by a pdoc

Big hug jfulk…… Don't beat yourself up.. If he does have BP there's good treatment.... xo
SensitiveHoboLady
SensitiveHoboLady
Hope you can connect with a good medical team. Sending support. I agree, don’t beat yourself up.
LavenderC
LavenderC
jfulk - I got it (major depression that turned into bipolar) from my mother, and my daughter got it when she was 12 years old. I feel very bad too to pass on this illness to my daughter. She is now 33 years old. Her therapist, who was also my therapist at the time, turned her against me telling her that it was all my fault and that I was a control freak. I got her to see a lot of therapists (after quitting that therapist). It was very difficult and many years to undo the damage that the therapist did to my relationship with my daughter. We have very good relationship right now, It gook a lot of patience and love on my part. The fact that I, too, saw therapists helped. I understand how to deal with my own daughter who has depressions illness because I have it myself. I know what I myself need to feel better. For instance, in my case I needed a lot of sleep and material comfort (!). I let my daughter sleep as opposed to pushing her to do things and get her things she liked such as video games and laptop. I hope you can keep your son safe,and that he will get the help he needs to get well. Best luck to you. Hang in there.
OlderCPer
OlderCPer
You can have him evaluated by a Psychiatrist but BiPolar Disorder cannot be Diagnosed in a 13 year old child who's brain is not developed still growing and still developing. The core parts of the brain where the chemical imbalance that creates BiPolar Disorder aren't fully developed until a person is between 18 and 20 years old....at 13 its impossible to DX BiPolar.

Things like ADHD, ADD, Teenage Hormone surges, Puberty issues all can happen at these ages and many can mimic what parents who have Mental Issues might have had as symptoms.

Just because a 13 year old boy wants to go out in the middle of the night to do something exciting, and only cares that he got caught....doesn't think about all the awful things we parents think about could have went wrong, doesn't mean he's mentally ill.....it could very well mean he's just a 13 year old boy!

You might not want to jump in with guns blazing and thinking the worst. Perhaps take him to his Pediatrician and have his bloodwork done, a full physical, make sure all his hormone levels, vitamin levels and chemistries are where they should be. And if everything physical is as it should be then see if they recommend a Psych referral.
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