btw this is not a DS friend this is a facebook friend who was rude to me behind my back but I don't know how rude she was.

She didn't even wish me a happy b-day on face book.

Hugs to you BP, sorry to hear your circumstances. But it sounds like this person might be two faced, I would cut her loose. No one needs to be treated badly by being spoken ill about. Don't be a doormat, everyone deserves kind treatment. I know losing a friend sucks but you will find new ones...Maria J.

I also know this person in real life. I guess I should have expected it since she begged her way into my best friends maid of honor spot when my best friend already told her she chose her best friend which was me and then she whined when my best friend told her she wasn't her best friend until she told her that she was.

I completely agree with Saharawmn.

Weed her out. thats what I do. I am 30 too and we both are too old for dealing with high school bs. Take care of yourself and stop her in her tracks. People have their chances and when they blow it it should be a lesson learned for them. You be that lesson and hopefully she wont do to others what she has done to you. xoxo

BP, if you are basing this decision strictly on what ANOTHER person told you, then be careful with hearsay. I would suggest you talk directly to the supposed offending person about it and get her side of things. I have learned through experience that things are not always what they seem or others say and I need to judge for myself. If your friend that told you these things is telling you behind the other friends back that the other friend talked behind your back, what does that tell you?

Well Shelly he doesn't even consider her his friend. He only hangs out with her because she is friends with his wife.

He thinks she is using his wife and I think the same thing. We've both tied to tell my best friend that she's just using her for her money and a place to stay but she won't listen to us. My innocent friend claims that she's going to pay her back when she gets her disability money if she wins her case.

Geez oh pete, doesnt anyone ever see the pattern? We complain about people doing things to us and then turn around and do the same things ourselves. BP, you cant complain about her talking behind your back if you are going to do it here and with your other friend. There is no difference and it doesnt make it right just because she did it.

I know we all do this sometimes but to do it in the same sentence just seems odd.

What ever happened to TALKING, COMMUNICATING with the people we are struggling with? It should not be about who can "one up" the other or get revenge by doing the same thing. It should be about trying to understand and if we cant work it out then end it and move on.

This wasnt meant for just you BP, I understand you are frustrated. I just see it alot the last week and dont get it. My dad used to call that "talking out both sides of our mouth".

Talk to her and find out what you need to.

yep, right on Shelley

well I think what shelly said is the right thing to do. My advice was on the lines of what I would do but I have issues with trust. I will avoid someone to keep from getting hurt if I hear they were talking about me. I hate confrontation. Sorry I gave you the advice that I did. But if in any way you find this all to be truthful then I guess my advice will come into play. Good luck and get to the root of this without offending anyone if you can.

Two sides....I like your advice. I finally feel confidant in my decision to take that so called friend off my list. This is the friend who begged my best friend to let her be the maid of honor in her wedding. Originally it was me because I am her best friend. This is also the woman who whined until my best friend told her that she was her best friend instead of me. I have issues with this woman already I don't trust her. I wouldn't doubt that she wouldn't say something mean about me behind my back. She didn't get to walk down the isle first anyway I DID! She got to sit up in front thinking she was all that in front of the priest because my best friend's husband is catholic....I think she's still upset that she didn't get to walk down the isle first.

Well with that I stick with what I said. SOunds like she has been trying to make trouble for you and your best friend from the start. I have known a person like this one your mentioning. She was totally about breaking mine and my friends friendship up. She actually suceeded for a little while. It best to get rid of negative influences in your life. You having a disorder is bad enough ya know.

And if I don't hang with friends like that neither does my daughter. I won't let my daughter add her on any of her profiles yahoo or otherwise. I am going to talk to my daughter about it when she comes home.