since this has started up again have YOU talked to his doctor first he need to have all medical causes ruled out if so make sure not drinking specially anything that has caffine or high in the sugars make sure that he not drinking to late make sue he void before goes to bed then short of diapers or pull-ups and they leak plastic or rubber pants don't make a fuss and embarrass him but stand behind him and give support and don't get upset if the doctors tell they can't find anything wrong I lived with this my self for 62 years they could never find a cause every one said something different now for the past 2 yrs I had a surpa pubic catheter he may just grow out of it good luck &god speed to all of you

Thanks so much for your reply. Since my son is not willing to admit that it is happening again, I have not discussed this with him or his doctor. His pediatrician however is aware of his previous bedwetting and has checked out any medical reason that this would be happening. Additionally we have been to several urologists and were basically told to wait until his bladder matured. He was and still is conscious of what he drinks during the day and has always been sure to use the bathroom before he goes to sleep usually several times.

First of all, I would strongly encourage that you not panic! I know that's hard advice in this situation, but really, your son will know if you are panicking (whether you mention this directly to him or not) and it will just make things harder on both of you.

Second, I wouldn't hold my breath for a medical cause or solution. You already know the cause - he has an immature bladder. His bladder has matured some over the last couple of years, certainly, but you can be equally certain that there is still a definite gap in maturity between his bladder and those of most 16-year-olds -- it's just not possible to make up for that much lost time. In fact, he will probably have issues with a somewhat underdeveloped bladder for his whole life (as do many of us hear).

Don't despair, though. What has happened is that his bladder DID mature enough to stay dry at night some, if not most, of the time under optimal conditions. Unlike his peers, though, it was *just barely* mature enough to achieve dryness among those circumstances, and so it's perfectly normal and natural to expect that even a small change in his circumstances (could be stress - a very common trigger at his age - or anything else like diet, changing sleep patterns, or even a physical growth spurt) might be enough to "push him over the edge" back into having at least occasional accidents. The good news is that his overall trajectory is still good, and will probably still lead toward fewer and fewer relapses over time, even though he may always have the sporadic bout of wet sheets even in his adult life.

That is a hard pill to swallow, I realize, that this may still happen once in a while in adulthood. We all want a magic pill to make it go away, believe me. But adult bedwetting is actually VERY common, contrary to what doctors might try to foist on you (just look at this site for confirmation!), and furthermore, it is nothing to be ashamed of! It's just a physical body issue, just like asthma or diabetes or anything else - and no one has any control over it.

I'm an adult in my mid 30s now and have had these sporadic accidents my whole life. It's not ideal, by any means. But neither has it ruined my life or stopped me from doing anything I set my mind to do (just like asthma, diabetes or any other condition doesn't stop anyone from doing anything they really set their mind to do).

Maybe it's just me, but I think it's long past time we stopped obsessing about "curing" this condition, and focused instead on accepting ourselves and one another as we are. Watch your fluids and go to the bathroom before bed, sure, but please don't beat yourself up over an accident (and this goes for you and him both!). He has a weak bladder. His friends may have poor digestion, irregular heartbeat, bad eyesight, or 100 other things. We all are what we are, and we have to make the best of what we have.

Just my thoughts. I, for one, hope fervently that this is just a minor bump in the road for him and after a few more weeks he will never have to deal with it again. Realistically, though, I know better than to bet on that. So I hope even more fervently that neither of you allows this condition to define him or ruin his life, whenever or however it does occur. It's not worth that. Not nearly worth it.

I agree. I would not "confront" him (maybe that was just an exaggerated description for your casual discussion you describe in your post). This will either pass or it won't. In either case, it is what it is. I am 26 and have gone "hot and cold" with my bedwetting for several years after drying up for the most part at the end of high school. No one knows why it starts and stops and why I can be dry for a couple of weeks and then wet every night for a month. I would however buy him some supplies and tell him they are there if he needs them.

I am in no way going to shame or embarrass him but instead bring up the fact that I have noticed that he has been having trouble staying dry. If i decide to bring it up to him, I would find an appropriate him and do it in the most sensitive way possible. The only reason I was considering doing this was to let him know I am on his side and he does not have a reason to hide this from me. I do not want him hiding this and feel another source of shame. I myself just want my son to feel confident and happy and whether he is dry at night or not is not a factor for me. I am only trying to help and support him in anyway I can. I am a younger single mom and it has just been the two of us up until the last three years and he is really one of my best friends. When he is hurting it hurts me and just want to make it easier and more comfortable for him in any way I can. I do not know if I should let him know that I know or let him deal with it on his own.

I would acknowledge to him that you know, that its no big deal and that you are available to assist him in any manner he sees fit. If he tells you its non of your business, etc, than respect that. If he tells you he needs something, than cooperate. Just that simple. Tell me something.. are there any other late bedwetters in your family?

Did you or any siblings suffer from this as a child?

Not on my side but his father did struggle with bedwetting but only until the age of 8 and non of his paternal aunts or uncles had this problem. His father is not a constant presence in his life and my son definitely cannot rely for him for support especially regarding such a personal matter. I am not even sure that his father is aware Ty has the problem beyond the age of 10.

These days have passed in our house but we suffered through primary enuresis up to almost age 12. It is difficult as a parent to be able to come to a point where a good discussion of the topic can be had between parent and bedwetter. Your thoughts about not shaming or embarrassing him are the best way to go. From our experience there was an off moment when the topic came up in discussion and we seized the moment and talked it through. After that talking about it became easier for all concerned. Wearable protection was always on hand and once it started to be used things became much easier for all. Ask if you have a further question(s). Momplus

It seems like you have it more or less under control. Do you know how frequently this happens? The easiest thing is to simply protect his bed to ensure that he gets a good night's sleep. My suggestion is to put a mattress protector, a regular bottom sheet, another mattress protector, and then another regular sheet. That way, if he has an accident, he can simply strip of the first layer and go back to sleep instead of waking up and doing laundry, especially if he is upset. And let him know that he is not alone. Plenty of other people of all ages go through this.

He sounds a lot like I was at that age. About that time was when I started having stretches of dryness. As someone else said he may be just getting to where he can be dry under perfect conditions. I can remember Christmas morning when I was 17 years old....My younger brother came into my room to wake me up to open presents and I was soaked from my belly button to my knees. I am pretty sure it happened because of the amount of sweets I had the night before and not watching fluids...my parents were sure I no longer had a problem because on the occasions I would wet I cleaned it up before it was discovered. It was embarassing but they didnt make an issue of it.

I am so thankful for all the feedback regarding my son. I was not aware that he could go through periods of dryness and wetness while his bladder matured. I am just going to try not to stress and hope my son does the same. I have even mentioned that I there are websites that he can get support. When I said this he did not say anything but maybe it was helpful to know he is not the only one even if he does not go on the sites like these. I have decided this will be the last time I bring up this subject to him and just let nature take its course. Thanks again for all the support!!

very wise because if you keep bringing it up only adds stress and embarrassment to him at 16 he knows to seek you if he help keep your eyes and ear open so if dose need you you are there or if notice it getting worse you can then offer your help again good luck and god bless

I'm glad that you and your son have been able to find middle ground on the issue. As I mentioned it takes patience and then some. The periods of dryness do become longer as time goes on and his body continues to mature and I'm sure to you that it will seem like an eternity. Glad to hear that things are improving.

Hi momplus. I am a teen bedwetter. I have primary bedwetting and have never ben dry so I know how your son feels. I tis alwasy embarrassignwhen parents want to talk about my problem with me. but they do it all the time.