Anxiety Support Group
Anxiety is a physical condition marked by intense and persistent feelings of distress, fear, angst or dread. General anxiety caused by routine day-to-day stresses usually passes quickly and is experienced by almost everyone at one time or another. However, such feelings that linger over time and are very difficult to cope with, and which lack a clear cause, may indicate...
Hi everyone, new to daily strength.org! So I've had anxiety since childhood, which turned to emetophobia around the time I was ten. It was pretty manageable until my early 20s when I decided I needed treatment. I've been on and off with therapy, CBT, exposure and response prevention, neurofeedback, and medication but never found "the cure." Since 2015 I've been managing it pretty successfully with supportive therapy, diet, exercise, and yoga. I would experience mild anxiety during times of stress and panic attacks about once every 4-6 months.
Within the past year, my husband and I had to move in with my parents due to financial stress, which is a somewhat toxic environment. We were able to move out in July, and I thought everything would be fine. In October, my uncle got an aggressive form of cancer and suddenly passed, a close work friend died of Suicide, I was diagnosed with fibromyalgia and a mystery autoimmune disease, I left a toxic work environment, and within three weeks of starting my new full time job, I discovered my boss was a convicted felon who was using my name to bill for fraudulent activities. I handled all of this with manageable anxiety, and December 20th I accepted a new job that would pay me more than double what I was making for working half the amount of hours. I felt wonderful, this would solve our financial issues and allow me to have plenty of time for health and self-care.
On December 21st, I had a panic attack that seemed to last for 12 hours no matter what I did. I have not recovered. I wake up at 7:00 every morning due to intense chest pains and restlessness. I have to exercise for at least two hours to be able to not have a panic attack. I have lost 15 pounds from not being able to eat much without nausea and panic. I started buspirone and after four weeks all I felt was depersonalized and depressed, with no changes in my anxiety, so I tapered off. I am doing neurofeedback again, and have done five sessions which isn't enough to feel a difference yet. I can barely work, and fear every day that I will have to quit and we won't be able to survive financially. I have constant physical symptoms of nausea, chest pains, tightness, and trembling. Most of the time I can remain hopeful, but when the anxiety gets too high I just get so scared that I won't ever get better. I feel like I'm doing everything right, but am just not feeling better yet.
Thank you for taking the time to read this, and for any support you have to offer.
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I did the dumbest thing today. I charged my earbuds, unplugged the block and put the block in my little bag instead of the earbuds. I wasn't happy about that when I got to the gym. What a dummy!
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Ever since I stopped doing therapy because of insurance, I've been feeling that old tense and irritable sense of anxiety and stress. I hate that. I was making so many strides and changes during therapy, my therapist would acknowledge all of my progress and accomplishments, and I miss that reassurance. Today I thought about it, and I made those changes! She would always tell me that I chose to...
You have taken the important first step in writing it out.
I'm going to make a strong suggestion that you do a physical/mental/emotional/activity/menu journal-use stick figures for the pain movement. Use a positive and negative sign for where the level goes up and down and neutral for balance.
Mental is thinking and writing this out will help you sort through the patterns. Emotional is where you are in feelings. Activity will show what works best when. Menu is food, drink, and time.
One of the things with anxiety is learning how it works for your well-being. Panic is overwhelming, yet it is working for you.
In the job, you have listed that it is good. You will need to fix your focus on in the moment with work. Keep in grounding to stay on task in work.
Be kind and give yourself a set time to think and then push all thoughts of the think to the side, close the box, and move on.
The thing about anxiety....what happens when it goes down to normal range is that you will not feel the same-your levels level out and it's calm. Strange to find that normal after experiencing panic and anxiety.
You're stronger than you realize!
I hope that you are a comfortable new member to DS :-)
I'd like to zoom in on one of your comments: December 21 is the trigger point of a 12-hour panic attack. I assume that this was at Christmas time? Too often the holiday time and special events can result in major issues such as the onset of severe pain in joints, headaches out of nowhere, and a feeling of loss of independence due to the rush of the holiday planning. I feel that ordinarily, you can deal with it, your condition by managing on a personal plan, such as with supportive therapy, diet, exercise, and yoga, which things are true to help you navigate the complexities of health care. In other words, you don't need encouragement to participate, as you show signs of self-managed improvements very well.
I simply feel that something out of the ordinary is clinging to your mind and this is making it convenient to focus less on your plan of healing. And I further sense the trigger was self-programmed during the difficulties of dealing with the holiday season. Perhaps the financial aspects of holiday shopping and spending are still weighing heavily on your mind.
Hugs to you today, and try to find a few brain games to occupy your mind for the time being. Please take care.
I had to look up, "Emetophobia." That's a gross-sounding disorder for such a fun sounding set of syllables. It's a new one on me, so ? ? ? Perhaps explaining it to me will help you get a better handle on ^it^? Listening, if the thought resonates for you.
Crowded living conditions get literally toxic in a hurry. I don't understand the Toxic People Fad, but the emotional stress of crowded living conditions gets even more literally toxic in a hurry. ALL organic systems produce some gnarly toxins under emotional stress, making ALL players in the stress drama equally and literally toxic. I've lived in military and volunteer camps. I doesn't care to do the research, but earnestly believe the folks claiming non-toxicity are typically carrying more stress toxins than your average control freak. It takes all players in a crowded scenario to manage those literal toxins. Hope you are doing your part to contain those literal crowded living condition toxins. Doing your part can even serve as one of those brain games to occupy your mind for any time being. For my therapy nickle, doing my part beats stewing like a helpless victim in the literal toxins of crowded living conditions.
As for the rest. . . That is, indeed, allot to sort. Gentle support while you sort.
Welcome aboard.