I know I have social anxiety, Like You, I have never been s
diagnosed, With social, or generalized anxiety.

When I was a kid, My parent's went away all the time on trips, And I can remember getting physically sick in school, I think it was Seperation Anxiety,


Again never officially diagnosed...........So, Your not alone

Being diagnosed isn’t a bad idea. It could open up avenues of treatment. Having social anxiety is still an anxiety disorder. Anxiety manifests in multiple ways. The best advice I can give you is to educate yourself on anxiety disorder. Being informed and knowing why you feel like you do goes a long way toward recovery. And recovery is possible. You don’t have to feel the way you do for the rest of your life. Anxiety disorder, if left untreated, can become debilitating and greatly affect your life.

Welcome to the anxiety board at DS.

You've taken the important first step in writing it out.

Anxiety is natural. Anxiety is a helper. Breathing exercises will help you find the calm in the moment fast.

Best wishes as you find your better balance.

Hello Yagi. Welcome to DS. Sorry for what brings you here, but glad you are here.

Is your "Spazz" title anything like when I call myself, "A Social Retard?" I've been in psychotherapy since 1972 and have more official DX'es than I care to inventory. Allot of the dx'es I received in the 70's didn't translate to the 21st century, so I tend to take all the psych dx'es with the expectations I grant fashion divas. Whatever resonates this season will be a cultural embarrassment next season. I like to stick with the classics. "Social Retard" is a classic that is still comprehensible here in the digital era.

By whatever name or validation, social anxiety is a bear to live with. Support from other folks who live with the condition helps. If nothing else, it helps to know I am not alone.

Welcome aboard. Hope you find stabilizing companionship here. Dx not needed. It is a come-as-you-are forum.

Yagirl, thank you for sharing your experiences and questions. You talk about school, so you are young, and to some extent what your are talking about perfectly normal for a middle school kid to experience. It sounds like you may be feeling the anxiety a bit more acutely than some kids, but I think you would also be surprised how many of your peers are feeling similar feelings. It is totally normal to feel self conscious when others look at you, or when you are put on teh spot. I remember being in 7th and 8th grade, and at a new school with kids who were much more socially conscious and connected (i.e. wealthier and with cliques), and I was very quiet, hated to be called on to read in class, nervous with presentations, and I thought everyone was watching me for the least little bit of a misstep or doing something gross. I mean, I remember leaning on the table at lunch and a girl called me out for trying to lift my boobs (mind you, at age 13 I really had none!), sneezing and not having a tissue handy, and having my period come on suddenly during an overnight class retreat WHILE in a group circle WHILE wearing stonewashed, very light colored jeans! There are so many ways to be mortified in middle school, and so many other kids who are 1. looking to point it out on anyone else and 2. feeling the same nervousness and fear.

So, I am not trying to downplay your anxiety, but just give you context to know that you are not alone. Please, still keep an eye on your feelings and try to find ways to overcome it by finding your confidence - get a good friend or group of friends, find a supportive teacher, get involved in things you like to do, or work hard at something you like to do (even if you're not yet "good" at it). For me, I struggled/suffered through those middle school years, but the saving grace came through my sport and then high school starting, and being determined to learn how to be a better public speaker. That change in environment (getting away from those kids at that school!!!!) made ALL the difference in teh world for me.

And what came of that scared to speak middle school kid? I eventually came to love public speaking (so long as I am prepared and know what I am talking about!) and giving presentations and teaching, and I even got involved in acting for a period of time (a really good outlet for overcoming those fears). I still hate being put on the spot, and sometimes I can really crash there with some anxiety, but usually only if the topic or person doing it is too demanding.

So, hang in there, you are right to be aware of yourself and ask these questions, but remember you are still growing and learning and middle school years are hard. Keep on eye on these fears and anxious feelings to learn about them and from them and challenge yourself to overcome them. Don't be afraid to ask adults in your life for help with this either! A good family member or teacher will help you with these challenges, to understand them and overcome them, or help you decide if you may need some additional help manage them.

All the best to you.

Welcome to DS. When I first started on DS many years ago I was also anxious about it. I often wouldn’t check replies to my posts because of it. Slowly I began to find people I could trust to be kind, sadly many don’t come here anymore but there are others to take their place. I learnt kinder and more productive ways to think from them too.
I hope you find similar benefits. Remember you’re ok like you are. Forget other people’s judgments, if they judge you they’ve got their own issues.

Thank you for reaching out. You did a great job in expressing yourself!

I noticed in your other posts that you enjoy drinking and doing drugs, and while that can seem like fun in the moment, those two things can definitely result in anxiety and paranoia, as well as other issues in thinking and socializing. Especially if done in excess.

Have you talked to your Mom about this? I am sure she would want to help you. Seeing a psychiatrist and a therapist would really help you to get on track to a healthier, more happy lifestyle. You're 20 years old and you have so much great life ahead of you. Don't be afraid to seek a therapist and a psychiatrist. They can really help you get things on the right track!

Best wishes.

Hi again Yagirl, I am going to leave my previous response alone, but I did see that you updated your profile to change your stated age from 13 to 20, and that is fine. We're all anonymous here (you'll only know that I'm a 40 something year old woman if I tell you that!) and certainly manage to cover identifying information about ourselves, but I would have written my response differently had I known that! GirlinCalif gave you some good advice, too, and I saw a few of your other posts as well. You are going through a lot and have had a lot dealt to you - and I actually think a fair amount of my middle schooler advice can translate to you now. :) If you are not comfortable talking to your mom or family members, please do find someone you trust to talk to to get some guidance. Posting here can be helpful, but our anonymous advice will only be valuable if we have a fuller sense of your story. This Anxiety group is pretty active and has a solid group of regulars that are caring and have good perspectives to share - some of them commented here already. I hope we can give you some strength, safety, and solace as you sort through all your feelings right now and try to gain control and understanding as you figure yourself out.

all the best. :)

Sorry guys! I am quite new to this app and don’t know how to all works. But I am 20 years old!! Graduated highschool like 2 years ago. Adulting is hard haha