Anxiety Support Group

Anxiety is a physical condition marked by intense and persistent feelings of distress, fear, angst or dread. General anxiety caused by routine day-to-day stresses usually passes quickly and is experienced by almost everyone at one time or another. However, such feelings that linger over time and are very difficult to cope with, and which lack a clear cause, may indicate...

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Problems with love

michiev
michiev
I'm sorry for posting this here, But idk where else to post it. And I need help.


I'm in love with my best friend, He knows about it. I told him over a year ago, I was having a really hard time dealing with it for a long time, I was jealous of his fiancee and I was angry and bitter because of some mistakes she made in the past with him. I recently came to terms with it, I accepted it and me and her are even friends now.. I've been doing so well up until yesterday when I got a little freaked out about some situation and wanting to ask him something, Today I found out that it wouldn't be possible for him to come and visit me, I was disapointed and then I talked to one of my friends, she asked me what my relationship with him was like and then she asked me why I even did this to myself if he didn't love me back and now I'm thinking horrible thoughts, I'm being jealous again and I'm really sad and lonely.. I'm confused, these feelings are really confusing.. Me and my friend have had our problems, like little fights and arguements that I honestly thought would end our friendship.. But he's stayed with me so long and never given up on me.. Him and his fiancee are pretty open, Him and her flirt w/ other people and it's never a big deal, He's flirted with me a lot before, No jealousy from any of the two.

But when I told him I liked him, he said a while back he had a crush on me too...

I just don't know what this is..
deleted_user
deleted_user
It sounds like this has been going on along time. Maybe its time to move on and heal yourself. Have you thought that he is using you?? To have a fall back in case they break up?? I dont want to sound mean, but these things never work out and you have wasted alot of time on this frienship/crush.
michiev
michiev
Well you -do- sound very mean, I came here for advice. Not judgements and people telling me to give up a great friend just because he doesn't feel the same way I do. He's -not- using me, he's not that kind of person and he never will be. He's just not in love with me.
Community LeaderMid
Mid
There are many friendships with a high emotional connection that do not include a physical connection, and it sounds like this friendship may reach that point.
Admitting to a crush is honorable.
Loneliness, sadness, jealousy, and before those emotions was the sensation of disappointment. It's hard to separate a 'friendship' with a 'friend-relationship' until you do what you've done here-write it out.
You're at an age where finding who you are as an individual will help you decide what kind of relationship you want with your friends.
Kellysue was giving you a different way to view the situation.
I hope this helps.
deleted_user
deleted_user
Maybe if you just take a break from him for a little while, it will help you both gain some perspective. Sometimes trying really hard to fix something in a relationship just makes it worse, and with some time apart, you can both reflect and come back later and it will make your friendship stronger. It seems like if he's flirting with you, he is kind of being selfish, especially if he knows how you feel. He's not letting you move on and make yourself feel better. I think that sometimes people do this when they know someone likes them because it makes them feel good, but they don't consider that it keeps the other person hopeful that something might happen and it's hard for them to let go and move on. I totally get what you're feeling, but if you take some time apart and take yourself away from him, you'll be able to see if he makes an effort to keep up the friendship or not. Plus, you can focus on yourself and making yourself feel better. And maybe you'll be able to find someone else that wants to be with you and makes you feel special and like you're a priority in their life. You deserve it.
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