Anxiety Support Group
Anxiety is a physical condition marked by intense and persistent feelings of distress, fear, angst or dread. General anxiety caused by routine day-to-day stresses usually passes quickly and is experienced by almost everyone at one time or another. However, such feelings that linger over time and are very difficult to cope with, and which lack a clear cause, may indicate...
Heya, I'm not sure how related to anxiety this is but I wanted to see if anyone else has experienced this.
I've always found that I have a very small social battery. I'm quickly drained by social situations, especially with many people, and I often experience anxiety even with people I have known for a long time. I also find that it's very easy for me to feel distant from people, even if I know them, especially if we don't talk for a little while. This really sucks; it's difficult making connections knowing that they will disappear for me, and difficult to make connections knowing that I basically have to fight a kind of constant battle to keep them going in my brain. For this reason, it's difficult for me to keep anything other than very close friends; I quickly lose my connection to a person if I don't talk to them for a little while, this could be a couple weeks, and then I start feeling awkward around them as if we had never met. It even happens with people I talk to consistently. As a result, I often feel alone and unable to talk to people, even if in reality I have many friends who would be willing to listen.
This makes life difficult, and I'm not really sure how to improve on it in the long term. I want to find a way to fight my tendency to become distant from people, but for now I've coped by ignoring that feeling of distance (none of my friends feel this way I've found, just me, so if I pretend that I don't feel that way then things go as normal).
I'm really not sure how it all started, it may be connected to how I have some trust issues, and I had social anxiety for a while as a kid. As a result, I didn't really develope my social skills when I should have, and I'm probably seeing the consequences of that now.
If anyone else here has experienced this, do you have any advice for dealing with it? Or just experiences?
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I haven't written in my diary on my computer since May because I thought that my computer was dying. I got away from writing but my computer is hanging in there. I think that I will start writing in it again. It's so therapeutic.
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Years ago, I won a mirrored armoire from my job. It's in my bedroom but I rarely stand in front of it. Yesterday, I had to have a dexascan done so I had to change into a gown. There was a full length mirror in the changing room. I'm aware that I gained 5 to 7 pounds over the last year from cheating on Keto but I didn't know what it looked like. It was a reality check.
I haven't gotten beyond simple acceptance and tolerance of the psycho tick. ^It^ isn't the meanest symptom on my psycho smorgasbord and hasn't risen to the top of the priority list. For now, I simply know this about myself and choose to accept ^it^ about myself and judge myself as worthy of love, in spite of ^it^. From that gentle self-acceptance, I am freer to choose whether I am interested enough in a particular relationship to gently nudge myself over the hurdle or just let ^it^ be.
thanks so much for sharing this, as this very topic has been weighing heavily on my mind for some time now. I don't have any advice because I'm still trying to cope with it myself. But I can share my experience.
I haven't pinpointed why exactly I do this, but maybe it's rooted in trust issues also. I grew up outside my home country. When we moved back 20 years ago now, I was still in high school and ever since then, I have had difficulty maintaining relationships.
I am exactly how you describe - I have to talk to people regularly to not feel awkward around them. If I cut the social contact for too long, it's like getting to know a stranger all over again. I even did this with my own parents as the time I spoke to them would get further and further apart until they started to feel like strangers to me.
Interesting that Shakyinside mentions Aspergers. My grandfather was never officially diagnosed with it, but he showed many of the characteristics so I'm thinking that it's in my genetics anyway.
Part of me wants badly to have friendships and meaningful relationships, but the other part knows how painfully awkward, difficult, and draining it is to maintain these same relationships. So I guess the first step is acceptance that this is who I am and try to make small improvements along the way.
Like you, I also maintain a small core group around me, which consists of a couple close friends and my immediate family. Otherwise, it's mostly acquaintances.
Thank you so much for sharing as I really appreciate being able to relate to this topic so well.
It is common for people to distance themselves from those people they do not associate with daily.
Making the effort to stay in touch with a lot of people is a task that takes away from enjoying relaxing moments.
A lot of people I know are acquaintances, and I'm comfortable with the social connection being "loose".
Having a small circle who I reach out to, listen to, respond to, react to, and make effort to stay in close contact is worth the effort.
When a disagreement occurs with an "acquaintance", I often step back and wait for their "air to clear" before I respond.
With a friend, I make the effort to do more to help "clear air".
I'm known to be friendly with people in general, making general positive conversations, as most of the people I know are. We are polite, and would work well together for a common goal.
Be kind to your self.
Ive been trying to also work at it, being more compassionate to myself etc. Sometimes we need to recharge alone, dont know why thats such a bad thing?
anyways... just wanted to let you know, Your Not Alone.
And although it feels really bad sometimes, try to be gentle with yourself. Its okay, maybe you lean towards being more introverted like me. And thats okay and normal!