Aw i'm so sorry to hear this, firstly you need to see a doctor asap they can give you something to help ease this pain right now while you find more long term solutions. They can also suggest professional mental health and emotional care! When my anxiety started I was given lexapro and xanex and they helped me remain calm and have the will and clarity to focus on dealing with anxiety more naturally in the long term.

Hi - thank you, yes i think i may need medical help.

No problem, it's first step, especially as you are exhibiting physical symptoms. In one of my earlier posts people made lots of great suggestions on helping me deal with my anxiety if you wana have a look, the title of the post is "therapeutic tools". I hope you begin to feel better in time xx

Based on personal experience his leaving may be the greatest gift you will ever get from him. This is a grieving process that will heal in time IF you cut all ties to him.

Hi - thank you, I will look into tools post x

guys - what's happening is called 'grief'. It's quite normal.

It's truly horrible, but it's quite normal.

I went through it. You could use medication - or you can just do the time. Anxiety is huge, depression is huge, emotions are a total rollercoaster. Crying lots, that sort of thing.

100 yrs ago you wore black and didn't leave the house for a few months when your husband left. Of course, in those days he left because he died. But the idea was still the same; the shock is awful. the disruption is awful. The breakage is indescribable.

It felt to me like two trees had grown, separately, in adjacent plots of land. They hadn't got on well with each other, but they had still put their roots into the same soil, and gained nutrients, and established themselves there and grown strong in a way they hadn't noticed. They'd started as tiny saplings and become over the years large majestic trees and hadn't noticed themselves doing it.

and then one day one of them rips itself out of the soil and goes and tries to transplant itself somewhere else. Not knowing that it wasn't as easy to transplant any more. Not knowing how much it had changed while it was there.

And everything's torn to bits. And the tree can't breathe. And it's gasping for oxygen and water because all its feeder roots are ripped to bits...

And all it can do.... ALL it can do... is endure the horrors as its twigs die, and hunker down and pull its sap into its trunk... and shut off all unnecessary functions and pot itself into soil and keep itself watered, and fed, and sheltered from too bright sunlight and too hard frosts...

And hope like hell it can get through it till its feeder roots re-establish.

There you go. That's how I see divorce. And it's bloody awful. Absolutely bloody awful.

Keep a journal, a private journal, that you do not share with anyone. In this journal, each day list five good things you have accomplished. Even if it is as simple as get dressed, talk to someone, eat a healthy meal, take a walk, be outside. Give yourself time to grieve this loss, and acknowledge both the good and difficult. Divorce is a part of life, do not let it define you. Take time to choose a goal you want for yourself. You can grow from this experience, and become even stronger! Best wishes.