I (kinda) follow what you're saying. If you are genuinely trying to talk to people and have real discussion, most/a lot of communication is actually non-verbal. And that may be a part of your mask issue... without being able to see people's faces it's more difficult to relate to them and read all those non-verbal cues. And, like you said, online discussions obviously lack anything but the actual words. You can't even hear the tone with which they are delivered. So, as helpful as they can be (this forum, for example), they are never really going to be comparable to sitting down face-to-face and talking to a group of people.

I think you hit the bullseye of what I'm trying to say on the non-verbal communications, Brockster. In some ways that is kinda liberating because writing frees me from the burden of interpreting those non-verbal communications. Alas, the absence of those physical cues make it impossible to know when my words are hurting someone.

Thank you for helping me connect that dot on the mask weirds. Alas, I am still dealing with PTSD flashbacks when I see a surgical mask. It's hard to evaluate current reality while trapped in a flashback psychosis.

@ I.F.
The court case surrounding my foster charges has me feeling that paranoia of being tracked on-line. Still. . . My psychotic herstory has me even more worried the explosive side-effects of holding in my emotions. Damned if I do and damned if I don't?

But my 40+ years of experience with computers suggest that my greatest on-line protection is sheer volume. Theoretically, my on-line communications from the 70's is floating in the internet ether somewhere, but good luck finding it.

The biggest headache with just writing is that perspective determines what works in the words used.

I have seen people respond with 'personal' and their intent was not to attack but to compare, and yet, everyone read it as 'attack' because of a couple of words added.

In the world of unwritten language, use of body motions provides the clues as to the direction of the words and emotions.

I say in the world of anxiety communication, we are all trying to figure out how to make the words work for us in helping ourselves and each other.

I think Mid makes an interesting point about how this forum seems to promote an added filter. In my limited time here, I’ve seen many replies that address specific points in the initial post and offer advice and shared experience. There’s an etiquette here that doesn’t persist through most of social media.

While there’s something freeing about espousing your viewpoints (anonymously or not) from behind the safety of a screen, I think in-person conversations benefit from social norms. We, as a society, have established that aggressive responses are not acceptable in person, but for some reason, that same social norm hasn’t been transplanted to online communication. It makes me very wary about posting anything on social media that could be controversial.

And even virtual meetings through Zoom miss the mark. The flow of conversation is awkward, and you can’t make eye contact. Verbal affirmations and head nods go a long way, but a lot more is needed when it comes to controversial topics.

That being said...I think the world would benefit from being able to have tough conversations about controversial topics.