Talk over the therapist. I've done that and then pointed out they're diong it to me. Took me some courage, y'know? But, ... yeah. Sometimes saying "I'd like to be heard now" is what other people need.

I agree with Leo. It is hard but sometimes you have to speak up for yourself. It does get annoying when you feel you are not heard. If the video helped you than you have a new view on the subject

Hmm. When someone talks over me, I've done different things. Depends on what I want the end result to be. I've put my hand up, I've stopped speaking. I've turned away. I've stood up.

When a therapist does it, I would definitely stop it. Their purpose is to help, so if they think talking over is helping, It's a challenge to open up when you are a very private person.

Do you think you are an introvert or an extrovert?

I just read a book about a newly proposed third kind of person who basically doesn't need to be in a group and can feel disconnected from others -- an otravert. That is what I think I am. Used to think I was an introvert and I can chat with people in a group but I just never feel like I belong in the group.

Anyway, it is okay to set limits gently with your friend or your therapist. My husband doesn't listen, he just wants to talk. As he has lost his vision, he can't see faces or body clues and so just talks like there is no tomorrow.

I have started to say "Just listen" or "wait, I am not finished" in a polite tone of voice and you might try something like this with your therapist.

I actually have felt that way many times. Even now. I feel alone. If they hear me they misunderstand me It’s ok to need your time alone. I don't need constant attention. But we all need someone to share things with. To hear us. I’ve lost that closeness with friends and family over the years. If you ever want to be heard you can reach out to me

Hasty my husband struggles with hearing loss. At least I struggle with his hearing loss. He refuses to wear his hearing aids. Doesn’t hear half of what I say. It sometimes feels like I’m alone even when we’re together

Interesting. For me I don’t equate not being heard with being alone. So that gives me a little different perspective on that.

Of course hearing and listening seem to be two different things too.

I was having a discussion with my boss and she said something I didn’t initially agree with on the surface. I didn’t interrupt her but was ready with a response so once she paused I countered back and she abruptly said you are you aren’t hearing me. I said I do hear you but I just don’t agree with what you are proposing.” We both kind of chuckled and found a path forward but reminds me how challenging communication dynamics and habits can be.

When I was a kid I was very much an observer and passive communicator. I don’t know that it was so much that I wasn’t heard but rather more I was kind on the outside looking in. But I grew up in a really dysfunctional house with an alcoholic parent so poverty, fighting, and a smidge of violence didn’t really make for an environment where you really wanted to be heard. You wanted to disappear.

But funny enough I was always pretty social growing up and now. I’m socially super friendly. But man my social batteries drain pretty quickly and once that happens I’m done. I need a lot of down time in between the “on” times.

My husband is actually a great listener. Sometimes though he then remembers a talk we had like 20 years ago and suddenly old business is kind of thrown at me. Like dude, let it go.

Wow, thanks for all of your responses. We all have a lot in common. I guess my therapist is just interjecting but she doesn't wait for me to pause. I just want to get my thoughts out. hasty, I basically need a balance of friendship and family with kind of a lot of time to myself. This is not new. I'm not really an introvert or an extrovert. I was very outgoing at my class reunion. I had a lot of energy that night.

rmb, same here about the social batteries. I'm always the one to want to leave first.

Oh I’m very much a come in big and then an “Irish Goodbye” kind of person. If I walk into a bar, within 20 minutes I’m pals with the bartender, chatting up the person sitting next to me, the whole hobnobbing thing, I crave good conversation and love meeting all kinds of different people. And then when I’m done I’m just so done. I essentially leave without a trace haha!

I think it’s perfectly acceptable to just politely tell your therapist, please let me finish. I think sometimes people interrupt out of habit. And they might not be aware they do it.. I would kind of want someone to tell me if they felt I wasn’t letting them finish.

Green, I'm guilty of being like your bestie. My bestie finally jumped on me after nearly 30 years of my rambling. I'm now trying to listen more and not dominate our conversations with my ramblings... Kindly let your bestie know sometimes you feel unheard by her