You were snoping and you have to live with the consequences of the knowledge you gained.

Hmm. I agree with Thor.

Snooping in a wallet and discovering a photo that 'bothers' you.

Not your wallet, not your decision. Not your problem, not your choice, however, it is an unintended consequence of a choice you made to look in another person's private property.

And, just as you have to choose how you will react, respond, and be responsible for your actions, you remind yourself that honorable intentions often have unintended consequences.

You can let it go (unlikely as this is bothering you so much) quietly which is the safest way to move forward in a positive direction. You can mention you looked through his wallet and it looks like he might like a new wallet.

Here's to making a positive decision that improves your well-being and brings a better balance.

It probably doesn’t mean anything other than it’s an old pic that has been in his wallet forever. If he doesn’t give you any reason to doubt his loyalty than it’s probably not worth worrying about.

My husband and I have been together over 20 years, five before we were married. Can’t say I’ve ever snooped in his personal belongings, ie wallet, files, photograph, phone, emails.

I'll add my voice to the 'Fess Up Choir. Snooping is not on my personal list of bad habits, but there are plenty of bad habits for everyone. 'Fessing up to my bad habits and taking the consequences helps me get it through by thick skull that it is a destructive habit, however understandable. It also gives a more sincere honesty to my relationships. Full honesty within a relationship is hard enough without my getting catty over the little oopsies.

A new wallet sounds like a great idea. My hubby would probably still have pictures of his gf's from the 70's if I hadn't supplied the motivation for him to clean out his wallet by getting him a new wallet. He already knows how lazy he is about cleaning out his wallet. I forgive him. It ain't even the worst habit on my wifey gripe list. . .

I have snooped too. Is it good? No. Did it give me bad anxiety? Yes. Should you have went through his things? No. Are you a terrible person? Not at all. I think buying him a new wallet is a brilliant Idea. I can tell you dont actually think he is doing anything by the way you worded your post. This is just anxiety nagging at you. After this ordeal you have to fight the urge to snoop like an intrusive thought. Its a compulsion and its damaging to relationships. I almost lost my parnter because of my insecurities and trust issues. I was treated really bad and cheated on and even though it was a bad experience. It still does not give me the right to make my current partner pay for my ex's mistakes . Also I owe it to myself to heal and not be paranoid all the time of how my new partner will screw me over. Being able to let go and fully trust your parnter is an amazing feeling.

Him still having a picture of his ex in his wallet, no matter how or why you found it, is now representing something in you that you are feeling insecure about in this relationship. Not necessarily your fault for having this feeling, though.

How long have you two been together? Has he done or said anything that would lead you to believe he is not 100% committed to you?

I would ask him about his previous relationship(s). See what he says about this particular ex. I have found I learn a lot about a potential mate by how they talk about their exes.

By the way he talks about her, if it's obvious he has no feelings for the girl in the picture, then forget about it.

No, don't throw out any of his pictures! If my guy still had pictures of his ex, I wouldn't care. This is part of his life, his past, his memories. I know he doesn't have those kind of feelings for her anymore.

I think you need to ask him about her. There was a reason why you snooped.

If you know he didn’t mean any harm by it then there is no reason to buy him a new wallet. That seems like a test or a trick, to me, in my mind, to see if he tosses out the picture. You’d have to assume he does unless you find yourself needing to check his wallet again.

To me, being curious about what his picture on his drivers license looks like seems like your way of permitting yourself to go in his wallet. I think it’s more than that.

I’m for honesty but in this case I’d really try to get past it and move on.

I decided to tell him what i did. I just broke down crying because I felt so bad, he apologized and said he forgot it was in there then threw it away also that it was okay he wasn’t upset. He said it wasn’t a big deal for me to have been panicking like that and I should have just told him.

I’m glad you found a way to handle it and hope it helps feel better.