Nope, I am not pushing myself at all during the current social upheavals. I believe that processing the yaddahs of the blahs has me so near to psychotic break that pushing myself could have potentially explosive side effects which frighten me far more than death by whatever means. I still solidly believe COVID-19 is nowhere near the meanest pathogen in my strictly personal petri dish. The anxiety pandemic feels far more lethal for the long run.

I am using every stress reduction option available to myself and the other five members of my family and take those options far more seriously than anything else in our socially distanced lives.

Hi there! I understand where you are coming from all too well. This Pandemic has wreaked havoc on those of us prone to anxiety and I'm sorry you are experiencing what you are. But unfortunately things are what they are, for now, it Will pass and eventually we will look back and say wow that was a crazy time. I like you, am also very concerned about going out and trying to do anything now. I actually made not so much a similar post but something along the same lines earlier this morning. I don't feel it my place to offer any kind of marital advice but I just wanted to respond to your post to let you know that you have been heard and are not alone in this. I wish you all the best and remember we will get through this. One thing I will say is meditation may help, if you haven't tried already. Again remember you are not alone in feeling this way.

I think you need to reorient yourselves. Covid is never going away. No amount of social distancing or masks is going to eliminate the virus. This virus is just like the common cold (actually the mortality rate from the common cold is higher than Covid). You need to learn to live with the virus. It will take its place in the pantheon of bugs that are with us forever. So I'd worry less. Also, watch less news they are making this thing out to be much greater than it is. You are 35 and your chance of dying from the covid is extremely low (less than one-quarter of one percent).

I think your anxiety is unfounded. This is not going away, the chance of death is exceptionally small, and your real immunity will come from getting the virus and getting over it, and lastly, several vaccines are being developed but we as humans have yet to develop a single covid vaccine yet. So don't hold your breath on the vaccine.

So comply with your local ordinances but don't worry about covid.

@Thor2008 There will eventually be a vaccine and a proven treatment. I will consider this time "over" when that happens. Also, my anxiety isnt about myself getting it...it's about others getting it like family members, wife, etc. There have been people in their 30s with no pre-existing conditions even who have died from this, had strokes, etc. I know people in my age group who have lost people from Covid. My anxiety is not at all unfounded.

Stop. Pause. Breathe.

What exactly are you doing?

Writing it out is important. Reading what you write about and sorting out the emotions, feelings, thoughts, and options will help you move through the process of making choices.

Before you speak. Stop. Pause. Breathe. Pay attention to listening. Not to respond, to really feel what is being said.

I am responsible for what I say, do, react, and respond. I am not responsible for what others say, do, react, and respond. In changing my response for my well-being, I have often seen others' responses get worse before they improve. The difference is that you will find more ways to stay connected in a positive way.

Anxiety is natural. Figuring out how you want to use anxiety to help you is an individual process.

Best wishes as you find your better balance.

Those local ordinances are what worry me. Organic pathogens (such as COVID) have far more predictable natures than human social structures. Both are equally tenacious, but laws proliferate with far more creative/cruel permutations than any microbe ever studied. Genocide. Holy Wars, dictatorships, etc., etc.

My anxiety is from the legal/social whachamacallits, not The Virus.

I miss indecently exposed smiles and random acts of kindness. Replacing all the coping mechanisms which are CFC (Closed For Corona) is a full time challenge.

MP823 - I agree that this won't get better until vaccines are available. I still don't feel safe sitting inside restaurants to eat. That will make me very nervous for sure. I only go grocery shopping and to doctor appointments or to post-office if I need to. We due to our health problems don't go out much but not being able to go out for fear of the virus is very stressful. I would say for the time being it is better to "stay home" as much as you can. People still catch the virus, and there are report of death everyday. Reducing the frequency of ourselves going out will decrease the chance of us getting it. I hope you and your wife and your parents are safe. Wear the masks when you go out and stay as far away as possible from others. That is the best we can do. I hope you will feel better from the anxiety of going out when you need to.

MP823- the number dying under 40 is very very small, as compared to things like driving. What is actually more is the increased number of suicides during the same time. Remember that 48,000 Americans die each day. The Covid deaths are not even a statistical blip in those daily death totals.

From Forbes: https://www-forbes-com.cdn.ampproject.org/c/s/www.forbes.com/sites/gracemarieturner/2020/05/22/600-physicians-say-lockdowns-are-a-mass-casualty-incident/amp/

yes and no--the first few months I went out once to get a supply of eggs and meat because they wouldn't deliver them. I was terrified---then I was put on meds and got a little bold and have been pushing myself the last few weeks--not nearly as scared-trying to get used to leaving my house for when I go back to work--otherwise I will just end up in a puddle in the parking lot!! right now I am back o not wanting to leave my house. I'd say if you don't HAVE to--like you are not working towards some goal--and you are both happier staying home--stay home! find some project you can work on together that will be fun-so you can enjoy each other.

I have unfortunately experienced the loss of two friends to COVID and almost a third. A fourth friend had a mild version of it. All of them were being careful, wearing masks and washing their hands and still caught it. I wasn’t aware until I looked at statistics. COVID has killed more than 44 more times then that of the flu. It surpassed the flu within the first several months. I would discuss activities as a couple, and plan mutually agreed upon activities that you can both enjoy.

Stay safe. Wishing you serenity and peace.

@thor2008 Based on your responses, it sounds like you are lucky enough to not know anyone who has been very sick with this or died from it. That is good and keeps you feeling cavalier about this. Or maybe downplaying covid is your way of not feeling anxious about it? Either way, seems that you're content so that's good. But please do be careful out there.

Just because someone is under 40 doesnt mean they dontt have pre-existing conditions that can increase chances of this being fatal for them. And again, I know people who are young who have died from this with NO pre-existing conditions. Google "Nick Cordero" to read about his tragic passing. He was in a coma for weeks and weeks, had a leg amputated, and eventually passed away...a healthy, young guy on Broadway with no pre-exisisting conditions. 30 year olds are having strokes, a 9 year old just died from it in Florida yesterday. This is not a joke.

Telling someone with anxiety to just not worry about it and that their concerns are unfounded is not helpful. Take care.

Do you think it's best to do whatever will reduce stress and fighting during this crazy time, even if it means not going places?

This is the question that was asked.

It is how anxiety affects us-those of us who experience "worry" often find ourselves at war with simple decisions because of the connections made in our decision making process are valid, real, and full of "what ifs".

"Unfounded" concerns come from a perspective without "worry" anxiety. It is valid from that perspective, and recognizing that it is not helpful to resolve the "worry" anxiety is a positive decision.

This is not about right or wrong feelings. It's about how to make the best choices and keep anxiety within normal balances to function and maintain daily tasks.

What works for one type of anxiety often can set off major anxiety for another type. This is why there is no "one size fits all" answer.