Anxiety Support Group

Anxiety is a physical condition marked by intense and persistent feelings of distress, fear, angst or dread. General anxiety caused by routine day-to-day stresses usually passes quickly and is experienced by almost everyone at one time or another. However, such feelings that linger over time and are very difficult to cope with, and which lack a clear cause, may indicate...

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Anxious about a trip

Cr.ispy91
Cr.ispy91

Hey all, im new here.  Im 29y/o and Ive had go deal with anxiety and panic disorder for 7 years.


My family and I have been a planning a road trip to Utah for a few months and I'm just rattled with anxiety about it. So much so that I actually decided not to go. 


When first planning i knew I was skeptical cuz of covid but also my mental health is very shakey so I told myself that i was going to go only if i feel stable enough to manage myself. And I tried to get pumped and hyped and all the self care.


But I know myself well enough that this trip is just not going to be good for me and on top of that, I was prescribed Lexapro for my anxiety and depression but I haven't started it because I'm just soooo sacred to do it and I've been on a wait list for therapy for 3 months. 


I know my family understands but I cant help but think that they are so disappointed.  But honestly I feel like I going to be miserable the whole drive over there. And I dont want them to worry about me having a panic attack.  


I'm mad at myself for still dealing with this anxiety and panic and im disappointed at myself for letting myself get carried away with the negative. I've had 2 panic attacks this week just  trying to function in the world .im just soo tired of feeling like this..how am I supposed to try to focus on the brighter side when everything freaken sucks and I feel nervous all the time! 


I'm trying to hard to be that strong woman I was raised to be but I'm just failing. 


Sorry this is alot but I just need to get this feelings out. I'll appreciate any input.


Thanks for letting have this space.

Rees
Rees
I think you are being smart if you decide to skip this trip. After the years you have dealt with this, you know the stress and anguish an extended trip can cause. Of course disappoints exists but so does the importance of your mental health. Start your medication plan and give it a chance to better your mental state. You are young and have much to enjoy. Good luck.
GirlinCalif
GirlinCalif
I completely understand what you're saying. What things have you tried in the last 7 years for your anxiety? Any therapy, medications, etc?

I know someone on Lexapro and they are a lot better now. I hope that you will try it.... it takes about a month to get the full benefits, so you gotta be patient.

Maybe the trip will be open in case you change your mind? Utah is absolutely beautiful! But if not, maybe this will give you motivation to work on your anxiety to be prepared for the next family vacation.

You will get better! You got this!! :)
Community LeaderMid
Mid
Go on the trip. Write out your feelings.

Use positive direction for your thoughts.

You can do this, and you'll feel better for following through and making it happen.
Thor2008
Thor2008
Go on the trip. You are going to miss something special and special time with your family. Utah is a very special place and it is something to see. Tell your PDoc to prescribe to you good strong meds for the trip because you want to go on the trip. don't miss the trip.
Cr.ispy91
Cr.ispy91
Thanks everyone. It really helps alot to get an objective point of you. Very grateful :)
arfie
arfie
Hello Crispy. Welcome to DS. Sorry for what brings you here, but glad you are here.

Apology NOT accepted for the length of your post. Rambling is both allowed and encouraged here. It helps with the sorting. Ramble freely. Ramble often.

I hold that getting mad at myself for my anxiety issues is like getting mad at myself for having brown eyes. I is what I is and I ain't what I ain't. I can use my big brown eyes more easily if I am not continually trying to gouge them.

Equally, neither my gorgeous brown eyes nor my pesky anxiety are the best thinking tools at my disposal. Letting either one of them run my life is far from the smartest thing I can do. Both give me access to important information, but I run that info through my logic centers before I decide anything more complex than which color of shirt to wear today.

But that is me and every case is unique.

Gentle support while you sort what is right for you, Crispy. Hope you feel safe to do part of that sorting here. Sort freely. Sort often.

Welcome aboard. You are not alone. Listening. . .
emmaotter
emmaotter
Cr.ispy, Im sorry you are going through this! How frustrating and I can understand (as we all do) why you would beat yourself up over this. Your family expects one thing but you know you and you know that this trip is not a good idea. Maybe talk with your family about making plans to do another trip next year and then take that time to try new things (your therapy, Lexapro...). I was on Lexapro for 15 years and it was amazing! It was hell to start with it but after a few weeks, it worked itself out. Just start low (like 5 mgs for a week) and slowly work your way up. Don’t feel bad about not going because there will be many trips you can go on and you don’t want to push yourself into have attack after attack because you are out of your comfort zone...you would just be going to make others happy....just my opinion, though.
Big Hugs - Emma
Ash122
Ash122
Welcome to the board, no judgment here. I, too, recently had a lot of anxiety over a trip. It was one I had to drive almost five hours by myself to the middle of nowhere with no cell phone service...to a cabin with friends. I convinced myself for two months that I was going to back out bc it was going to be miserable and I'd just be a burden to my friends bc of all my anxiety.

But I went. I don't regret it. There were good and not so good moments but I survived, and we're still all friends.

Anxiety sucks. And it sucks even moreso to have anxiety over your anxiety.

What specifically are you afraid of?
hyperpgal
hyperpgal
I have had GAD since I was about 9 yrs old and I still consider my self a strong person. You are strong--it takes a tough person to deal with anxiety--and you are doubly strong because you are seeking therapy and have medication to help you. You are looking to make yourself better. ALot of people just enjoy being the victim. I think you were right to not go on that trip. Yes-sometimes we have to cave in to our anxiety and feel like we are failing in some way--but I think you are making an educated and self caring choice. You know the level you are at--you know it could be a problem for others, you are putting your need for therapy upfront as a priority--If you start the lexapro you might feel side effects-so being home would probably be good then (I am on Lexapro--so hard for me to get onto in--But LOVE it now) I thin you made a smart choice. Don't beat yourself up--say you had pneumonia...would it make sense to go away for months...nope--same thing here!
Cr.ispy91
Cr.ispy91
@ash122 I get anxious in car. Im not sure why, I've always been nervous driver but not a passanger. I've been driving for 7 years now but I think its cuz I've had panic attacks while driving and while being a passenger so its a newish issue for me. But a 6 hour road trip while also start an SSRI feels like too much to handle .
Cr.ispy91
Cr.ispy91
@hyperpgal. Thanks for you insight. I really appreciate your honesty and it really helped ease the guilt I feel for ditching my family. Of course I'd love to go but if I'm being honest with myself, im glad I stayed behind to start Lexapro. Its feels ok, but the side effect are no joke. Its rough.
Ash122
Ash122
You know your body best. I honestly think you could handle it if it wasn't for starting the new medication. Until you're leveled out on rhat, things may be weird for a bit. So I don't blame you for your choices. Whatever you ultimately decide, own that decision. Do not feel guilty and do not feel upset about it.
TypeC
TypeC
Hi....I feel your pain with this one.

I too hate to travel because of the anxiety. Well, part of it is anxiety and the other part is that I've been involved in 2 auto accidents that were not my fault. Even tho I was not injured seriously, the emotional imprints are sitll there which make me 'jumpy' in a vehicle.

I agree with Ash122 about not going because of the new medication. I would wait until you are more stable and actually look forward to going.

These meds for anxiety can sometimes enhance the anxiety for a time and make a person more emotional when they are first started. Thinking back, I can't imagine going anywhere when I decided to try Zoloft!

I think you summed it all up in your post when you said, "But I think I know myself well enough that this trip is not going to be good........"

I hope things work out for you and the medication works!!!
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