I can see where winning a house could be an extra hassle. And I generally find that family visits are stressful, even when I'm glad about the people who are coming.

Something I read recently that I found really interesting:

If your mind wants to worry, it will find SOMETHING to worry about.
So it isn't important WHAT your mind is worrying about.
It could be worrying about something big, something small, something good, something bad.
Just notice that your mind is worrying.
It's just doing that same old habit.

(I'm at the stage of trying to notice when I am worrying, and trying to substitute a more useful thought, or some humor, or go and do something active and constructive to distract myself.)

Being a caregiver is difficult. Is there anyone who can give you a break to get out and do something relaxing or rejuvenating for yourself? Maybe your kids can do that when they visit? And are there people you can reach out to (in addition to here), to give you some support and caring?

CPA: Can you do business over the phone or by mail/email, instead of driving to their office?

Feeling stuck does not mean that you actually are stuck. Other people may be able to see and suggest possibilities and options that you cannot see.

I hope something I said helps a little.

nuwara2 thanks so much. Yes. your words helped me. It's just so good to know other anxious people feel anxious about the same everyday, day to day things that really should not upset us. Very hard to retrain our minds.

I too can see how all of this can be very stressful and lead to anxiety. I think many of us feel as you do when company is coming, no matter who they are, friends or family. You have a lot on your table. Do you kids offer you any help at all?
Hugs GB

Yep.. they are good kids. I'm talking about the "just stop over for a short time" visits. They have pretty much taken over the major holiday dinners etc.

I think I'm just a born worrier like my mother was. But I KNOW all these illnesses have magnified the problem to the point of being unbearable.

I freaked out for about 3 months once, because I knew some friends were coming to stay and I was truly terrified. I was terrified I would do something insane, I was terrified I would hurt them, or upset them. I was terrified that my illness would take me over and I would not be able to live down what happened next. I also was sure she was my enemy and would tell everyone at work about me and I would be living with the enemy for two months.

Freaked me out like mad. My counsellor said I should cancel - but you can't cancel when you have promised.

She turned out to be the best thing that had ever happened to me in five years. She normalised me. She was normal, and peaceful, and remarkably kind hearted, and she brought me back down from defcon 3 to 0 without me ever acknowledging the state I was in to start with.

I think I was hard on her, and I am ashamed of that - but she helped me amazingly.

I guess I'm saying that the things we fear are often the things that don't come true. I wonder if that is because we fear them? but if something gets me, it's always something I hadn't freaked out about in advance. :D

I will say congratulations with the house win! This put you in the unknown which is normal anticipation type anxiety, and the best plan to cope with this is to take physical action, stay focused in the moment, and organize your plan of action for those appointments (they are better to do in person, with your list of questions written down to keep concise to facts), and to reward yourself silly thoughts to replace the anxiety pattern.

In my recovery of balance to normal reaction anxiety - I started with exaggerated startle response first as it was affecting my ability to function in most situations, I noticed more and more markers (little triggers to certain pattern of thought), and worked on those in finding ways to use them to help me function better.

It's a difficult challenge to find balance in care-giving, however, as I was reminded, I must take care of myself first before attempting to take care of someone else. This helps me to keep active in making sure I get "free" time as well as the person I'm providing care-giving for.

Best wishes. You are not alone!