Meblonde, that's a great way to look at it. It really is such a small part of the day that ruins the other 20 hrs of the day.

It's tough. I work construction and I think Friday nights were the hardest because all the guys wanted to go out for a drink or twenty. Then I would meet a great looking girl and drink more. I could also hit the casinos and not get home until 9am the next day. I think it's really important your husband supports you. I'm also curious how you figured out a trigger for your addiction? I don't really see myself having one, it just is.

Fly, I quit drinking for 7 days. On the 8th day I experienced a tremendous amount of stress due to my husbands illness. When he's okay, I'm okay. When he's not okay, I'm not okay. I need to handle this stuff better for both of us.

One day at a time girl!! Vodka was also my drink of choice and I would just drink it straight up and sometimes straight from the bottle hidden in my closet at the time. Don't give up. I can't count how many times in the past I've slipped up like this. Pour whatever is left out or give to a friend. I've been staying super busy to keep my mind off of it. That vodka didn't make anything better did it? I always took my first shot thinking awwww that's better but then the day morning hate myself. It's not worth it!! EFFFF that vodka...who does it think it is, It's not the boss of us!! EFFF that!! We are stronger than it!! You got this girl! Don't let this bring you down. Brush yourself off, take a deep breath, and keep it movin.

Stronger, thanks for the words of encouragement. I know I can do this. I think I was foolish to believe that I could have liquor in the house at this point in my journey. It's gone now and my husband is going to refrain from drinking for a while.

I had 7 sober days 3 bad days and now another 2 days sober. I'm choosing to look at the positive. I'm doing better now than I have in years!

It sounds like your happiness is dependant on your husband's happiness. I think they call that codepndancy.

I use to get upset over things I had no control over but it was just driving me to drink more. Now I give it all to my Higher Power. He is in control of things I can't control and I accept whatever His will is.

IMHO

JustBeth, you sound so much like me! You CAN do this girl, 2 months sober here and I was downing Vodka daily. Keeping you in my prayers. ;)

Bobinmaine, I think I am very codependent. It's something that I truly need to work on in addition to alcoholism.

Newalco, thank you for the prayers. I definitely need them. I'm a MESS!

There could be a number of triggers!! I know that the #1 for me is good ol stress. It sounds like you are under an extreme amount with your husband being ill. I started drinking more when my dad was diagnosed with cancer and the passed four years ago. Whatever the stress may be we seem to go to drinking. I'm new to the sobriety scene but am encouraged by everyone here. Many blessings and strength to you.

I've heard the term a lot that we're not good to anyone unless we're good to ourselves. Really, how can we help other people when we can't help ourselves? I'm no good to my kids when I'm drunk, high or out loosing money. I'm sorry he is sick, and I'm really pulling for you to keep going & being strong.

Dear JustBeth,
Use you new knowledge and experience to re-dedicate yourself to a life with out booze in it. There really is life and lots of fun to be had, you just have to want it bad enough. I know you can do this... Eric

Vodka was my poison of choice as well. I'm glad that after a weekend of drinking you are back on track and that you are figuring out when you are most likely to want to pick up a drink. Forward progress!

When I feel those "triggers" coming on, I just remind myself that drinking will not in ANY way help the situation in the long one. It will only make me feel worse in the morning. I also try to remember that having hangover and that awful dry dehydrated feeling in my mouth is NOT worth it. Sick all day and wasted ANOTHER day off of my job isn't worth it either. Hang in there. We've all had a ton of day ones!