Alcoholism Support Group
Alcoholism is the continued consumption of alcoholic beverages, even when it is negatively affecting your health, work, relationships and life. If you think alcohol is causing you to lose control, it's time to seek help. Our group is a safe place to vent, check in, get back up if you fall, and reach sobriety.
There are a few AA groups in my area called something along the lines of...
Never Ever
Under No Circumstances
Under Any and All Conditions
They are groups that seem to have a reputation for being extreme. A couple things I have heard...
Anyone with under a year sobriety is not allowed to speak at meetings. They spend their enitre first year just reading and rereading the BB. Women have to be sponsored by men. You are expected to do exactly as you are told. You give up all self reliance. Their "way" they describe as putting "blinders" on you until you can be led to "safety". They say you don't have to WANT to stop drinking in order to stop drinking.
To me, it just sounds like they are more commanding about doing the program. It seems the members are "hardasses" and take the program 100% seriously all the time.
I am a bullshitter and a thinker. For me to rely solely on another person or group of people to do my thinking for me would normally be out of the question. My self-reliance is my security blanket. That said, I may need to be strong-armed to give it up. Most of the people I have met in AA seem to step aside easily while I run my show. I keep getting drunk. I am a magnet for these "never-evers" and they are the only ones who seem bold enough to assert themselves with me and not take my shit. A couple of them have actually come really close to breaking be down to surrender with the directness.
I dunno. They seem cult-ish and brainwash-ish.
Has anyone heard of these types of AA groups in your areas?
Never Ever
Under No Circumstances
Under Any and All Conditions
They are groups that seem to have a reputation for being extreme. A couple things I have heard...
Anyone with under a year sobriety is not allowed to speak at meetings. They spend their enitre first year just reading and rereading the BB. Women have to be sponsored by men. You are expected to do exactly as you are told. You give up all self reliance. Their "way" they describe as putting "blinders" on you until you can be led to "safety". They say you don't have to WANT to stop drinking in order to stop drinking.
To me, it just sounds like they are more commanding about doing the program. It seems the members are "hardasses" and take the program 100% seriously all the time.
I am a bullshitter and a thinker. For me to rely solely on another person or group of people to do my thinking for me would normally be out of the question. My self-reliance is my security blanket. That said, I may need to be strong-armed to give it up. Most of the people I have met in AA seem to step aside easily while I run my show. I keep getting drunk. I am a magnet for these "never-evers" and they are the only ones who seem bold enough to assert themselves with me and not take my shit. A couple of them have actually come really close to breaking be down to surrender with the directness.
I dunno. They seem cult-ish and brainwash-ish.
Has anyone heard of these types of AA groups in your areas?
It was suggested from the start that I commit to speak at every meeting if asked, regardless of how I felt. Fair dinkum did get asked every meeting too lol. I encourage the same with new members today. It helped me then, and it helps me now. HTL, willingness, honesty, action are key elements to moving forward, and they come from within you. If you want sobriety bad enough, you don't need someone to tell you, you'll go do whatever it takes. As for the bullshit. Your only bullshitting yourself.
I know all the posts really helped me.
I work only with women, both as sponsee and sponsor.
Didn't take long to discover that the men will pat you on the ass. The women will save your ass!
Billy
I've heard that women are 80% emotional, 20%analytical where men are 20% emotional, 80% analytical.
I'm just glad my sponsors have all been women. They could see my BS from a mile away while a man wouldn't know what to look for.
The last couple days I have been so close to giving up my internal resistance and surrendering, but I keep pulling back.
I won't seek out the never-ever group, but I think I will talk some more with the lady I met today. She made sense specifically to me. She seemed to understand exactly where I was and what I needed. We'll see. I am thinking my really cool sponsor that I love is just a really cool friend. I need more guidance than I am getting with the steps.
I can see how you would need a strong, disciplined group verse in the bb and the program. You are very strong, very smart and will challenge. The average Joe schmo is probably taken aback by that, can't debate with you and therefore does you no good. As in any organization there are a lot of people who just go with the flow, say the "right" things and don't really give it much thought. Challengers and Go with the flow types don't particularly mix well. The Challenger just stomps all over them, not intentionally, but the approach is much more direct and less likely to concede unless met with equal enthusiasm and valid argument. It's like mixing football players with balarinas. The game will suck and so will the dance.
Keep in mind, I am very tired right now... why not run your own show? I don't mean customize the program and do it your way. I mean work it, work it hard, don't settle for half assed direction or explanation. Don't move on until your satisfied that you have everything there is to get at that particular point in the journey. I do think your sponsor needs to be as strong as you, but not groups in general. Use your intellect and tenacity to find the answers you seek, study the bb, learn from it ... do it yourself. Everyone else is just there for support.
jmo
All my sponsors and i've had about 6 total, call me on my shit. I've never found anyone different. I picked them, did not realize they were that way. I thought all were. I am with another one now after not having one in about 4 years. This one is very good also.
I think you did out -patient, what about a rehab? I still didn't really WANT to quit. I had to make a change, though. I saw my sisters that didn't need it daily or weekly, other people that came to the bar to visit their hubby's and they didn't drink and seemed to be happy. THAT is what i wanted. Not to have to use alcohol to have fun. THat's what it turned into.
You know, i thought you had this months ago. You seemed a good fit for AA. You seemed like a person that had alot of references and answers. I just don't understand what happened.
Rehab, will consume your time and mind. You will learn alot every day and while i was in there, i didn't crave.BUT, i was given much needed tools to help me cope and see where my thinking wqasa getting me into trouble. It is good to take a break for Anna and not be tempted for 1 month. That would be a treat.
Good luck, Anna!!!!
Pam
Sometimes I believe we are led to be exactly where we were led and sometimes it turns out that where we are led, leads to where we are really suppose to be to acheive the maximum results of it.
Ever been in a maze.....the twists and turns along the way and soon you begin wondering if you made a wrong turn but in the end you found the way out?
Find the willingness to put one foot in front of the other, do the next right thing and then get out of the way and what to do will be quite clear as results are undisputable.
Ree