My husband asked do you want a beer because we are having"hotwings" I said yes...

I have no backbone..

You are in need of alot of support in order to achieve your goal of sobriety. AA is a great place to find that support. You can get a sponser who will guide you through the steps and you will achieve a life second to none! That's what happen to me 8 years ago and today I am happier then I have ever been!

You have alot of fears that are holding you back. The 12 steps will help you get rid of those fears so you can make some tough decisions moving forward.

God Bless!

Hi Pam! Congratulations to your decision on getting sober! I'm looking forward to your more hours and days. :)

I didn't even get to day one yet, so I'm proud of you. How are you doing tonite?

Husband brought home beer.

Whether or not he keeps drinking you have to talk to him. If he's not part of the solution, he's part of the problem.

Bringing home beer and offering it to you is a problem.

One minute at a time.

Pam --- (and with all due respect Jeff) you can do this if your husband drinks -- or is sober. likewise living with the worlds authority on "getting sober" won't keep you sober if you wand to drink.
My DH is supportive of me not drinking in that he doesnt try to make me drink. However, he doesnt believe I'm an alcoholic, and he drinks. We have bottles of wine, beer, hard alcohol around the house. Unless I'm going to live under a rock I have to learn to live with a society that embraces booze.
I have focused on my own sobriety. In the first three years I went to a meeting every day. AA gave me the support I needed and the big book gave me directions on how to live. I don't go to as many meetings now but I do go as I need to be around others who think like me, and remind me both that long term sobriety is possible and beautiful -- and -- i get to see people coming in and out and while its often heart breaking to see their struggles it scares me. But by the grace of god go I kind of thing.
So welcome. And know that you can be a sober woman with a drinking husband.

Yeah I wasn't saying you can't be married to someone who drinks. My wife drinks. There's tons of alcohol in my house. But she wasn't offering me drinks after I declared that i was going to stop.

Hello Pam,

How are you doing since your last post?

It would be nice if your husband supported you and maybe he will if you have a serious talk with him but this is really about you taking control of your own life. If you are finding it difficult to stay sober it may be that you need outside support. You can talk to your doctor about addiction counselling or simply go to a meeting of Alcoholics Anonymous. Whatever you decide, do not underestimate how serious the drinking problem can be and the need for you to take positive action.

My mother died of alcoholism at the age of 52. I was just a kid at the time and I was devastated. It emotionally traumatized me and caused me to make some very poor life decisions. I hope if you have kids , you think about them and realize you need to do all that it takes to get sober, and it usually begins with your doctor, you can do a complete physical to see how much damage has been done, if any and discuss treatment options for you.

In the end, it's all up to you. We can't stop you from committing a slow suicide if that's your choice.
We are all human just like you and we made the tough decisions to focus on our sobriety and put it before everything else so we could have the type of life one can only dream about! You can to, but like I said, it's your choice!

I will keep you in my thoughts and prayers!

God Bless

Thank you everyone, you have no idea how much your responses have been helping it seems when I start to think about alcohol I get a little reminder on my phone that someone has responded. It has been a big help. I can remember the last few nights. That is kinda cool.

Great job!!

Like StickyWick, I got sober with a husband who drank around me. I quit because I needed to quit. He wasn't pouring the drinks down my throat -- that was me, so it didn't matter that much if he supported me or not.

I did not use AA -- the meetings depressed me and the 12 steps and big book are in conflict with how I view the world. But that doesn't mean you shouldn't check AA out. Check out every avenue possible to help you quit. The world gets a whole lot better when you no longer see it through a drunken haze or stupor.