I haven't gone to AA, but I've thought of it for the same reason as you- for friendship. Many people have said the following: "Take what you need and leave the rest". I think you can attend without being a sold-out 12 stepper. Who knows? It might be a place where you can make some lasting friendships.

I also attend a church (full of non-drinkers). Sometimes I'll drop out for a couple of weeks, but it allows me to meet others whose lives do not revolve around alcohol. Some larger churches have small groups based on age, interests, alcoholism, etc. I went caving (crawling with a light on my head) with a church group this past summer - that was kind of fun. Just like AA, you could make church an "exploratory mission". There's no harm in checking it out.

Shunned? No. Most AA's like newcomers and I cant imagine anyone being pushy especially on your first visit. I am not into AA anymore, but I went at the beginning and it saved my life to meet other alkis and get help. GO! We alkis at the beginning need all the support we can find. You dont have to buy into all the AA principles-dont think to hard about it, just go and get support and know you are not in this alone.

Yes, I agree with both Jacker and Karmickiss. There's nothing wrong with going to a meeting and just listening,sharing if you want to, and possiby meeting some new friends.. at least you know you will have 1 thing in common!lol. Isolation is a very lonely place to be .. been there, done that. Not good for my recovery because I get too caught up in my weird thinking and it gets at me ya know? good luck. =)

I agree with KarmicKiss ~ you will NOT be shunned at ALL. You'll be welcomed with open arms!! It doesn't matter if you talk or not! You don't have to say a thing ~ whether you believe or not. NO ONE gets turned away at an AA meeting. So if you want to go just to listen or meet sober friends, go for it! Who knows, you might decide you like it! LOL

Take care. Hugs, Lee

Thank you all for your great advise...I think I am going to go to one tonight...I mean it cant hurt right? lol....who knows.....but I know I do need to find out and stop isolating....and yeah church too, I really want to feel "closer" to god, but kinda unsure how....I was catholic and not to big on that anymore, I guess I need to find a new church too....

Ashley- there are a bunch of independant churches out there that minister to people from all backgrounds. In my area, there is a place called The Vineyard that has upbeat music, singles groups, special interest groups, and no pressure. Your wear jeans and drink coffee in the service. I'm sure there are churches like this in Louisville (and there's probaby a Vineyard church too, because they've grown to many locations). Just another possible option.

thanks Jacker, and one more question...what is CD....i know its closed discussion...but what does that mean?

I remember a lady taking me under her wing at my first AA meeting and we are still 'friends'. Like in life, it does take time to build bonds but the point is to get there.

You will not be made to do anything. As said before, just take what you want and leave the rest. Also, the fact you are going is good. You will identify with others and you will be amazed how many other peoples stories will be similar to yours. It made me feel 'normal' when I was feeling an outcast.

Please do let us know how you go and well doen on being over a month. That is awesome :)

Hi my friend I know where you are coming from when I came into aa at first I lost one good friend but she was a drinking buddy and she could not handle me not drinking but all my other friends could see the damage I was causing. You should go to a meeting and just go with an open mind and listen my friend as everyone in aa is there with the same problem and as others have said you will be welcomed with open arms and what have you got to loose!!!!!!!!

I started going to AA because I needed to stop drinking. In the process I made alot of friends that I now can count on. I did not realize it until the hurricane how many care about me and count on me as well. I am the hermit de isolation King!!! One of my AA budies came by today and brought me out to lunch.
CD- Closed Discussion-Alcoholics only. This meetings purpose if for Alchies to discuss problems as it relates to alcoholism. When it says outsiders not welcome this typically means "non-alcohlics." The reason for this is so that alcoholics and talk directly about there problems and in the freest way possible without interference or fear of normies judging them.
OD- Open discussion- alchies and non aclhies alike are welcome. Topic discussions can range all over the map but typically they are confined to alcohol and the problems the disease has cause, but it is not limited to it. Anyone can, and do attend.
BB/SS- Big Book/step study. This is were the big book and the related 12 steps are read and discussed.

There has been some great advise given out there on this thread. Take what you need, leave the rest. This program is voluntary. The only requirement is a desire to stop drinking.

There's allot of people that go to AA just for the fellowship and don't get involved with all the steps . .There is those who only do the the first 3 steps.the main thing is getting there and sticking with the winners and staying sober.Actually the percentage of those who do the steps is very low.I do know that hearing about someones bad day didn't get me sober..peace

You won't be shunned, do whatever is necessary to stay sober. I have been isolated for a long time, but I find that it's the way I like it. I think that woman need more interaction than men and there is nothing wrong with that either. Do whatever it is that you need to be happy, you are not alone.

I found new friends when recovering, and don't isolate but get too meetings, isolation is one of the worst for an alcoholic.Alcoholics need people big time, even though they don't think so.

Boy! Ya got the whole thing wrong. A.A. is not all about that. The only requirment is a desire to quit drinking. That's all. Forget all those misconceptions that you have. A.A. is just other alcoholics, like you and me, that are trying to find ways to live a life without alcohol. Nobody wants to change your beleifs or anything. The one thing that they do want to do is help you. Not many people or places really want to help us because of the stigmas about alcoholism, but A.A. is good people that know about alcohol and the strugles we go through. You probably are very lonely now, and yes, a part of our disease is isolation. Most of us have felt differant from others for so long, and were scared that if people really knew us, they wouldn't want anything to do with us. Trouble is, when we first try to get sober, we don't even know who we are half the time. By going to meetings, and being with people, we find that were not alone. We realize that there are others, just like us. Go to the meetings. Keep an open mind and try to just listen, and not be judgemental. Remember, our best thinking got us into alcohol and where it took us. We did it. We didn't plan it, but it was our decisions. So just try to listen, and you might learn some good things that will help you. Being alone is not good for us. We need people in our lives. We need good caring people so that we can grow. God works through people. Just go, and keep an open mind and listen. You can do it. Just tell yourself that you'll try one, or two months, but give it an honest shot. What have you got to lose? A life of drinking with lonliness, and misery. Go and have fun. Use D.S. to. Lots of good people here that want to help to. Love ya. All the best. James

At a certain point in time and space I went to a.a. meetings and gave everyone their a piece of my mind, told the people there that thought they and their program was full of shit and then some. . . despite all of this they never shunned me - they told me to keep coming back and they meant it - they loved me until I could begin to love myself. Before I got sober I had maybe 8 phone numbers in my phone and most of them were for dealers, now, almost two years later I have over a hundred numbers in my phone, some of them aquaintances from meetings, many of them friends I met in meetings. One of the worst times of my life was that vacuum of space that could only be described as lonely where I found myself between the old drinking and drugging "buddies" and my now friends. I too thought the solution for a time would be isolating, and that goes to show me how wrong my thinking was. . . it seems that only alcoholics and addicts feel the best cure for being lonely is isolation. Yes, indeed, get to a months worth of meetings and just be yourself. You will meet many/some people there who will not shun you but welcome you instead.