Alcoholism Support Group

Alcoholism is the continued consumption of alcoholic beverages, even when it is negatively affecting your health, work, relationships and life. If you think alcohol is causing you to lose control, it's time to seek help. Our group is a safe place to vent, check in, get back up if you fall, and reach sobriety.

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Husband has been Sober 5 months but..

NovScorp
NovScorp
I am so concerned for my husband..He really doesnt talk to me much about his feelings so I spend alot of time guessing.Since he quit [he is a vienam vet who went to detox and rehab in jan} He gave up his part time job and is fully retired.Now he does not do anything but spend hours watching tv..I was looking forward to his not drinking so we could get out more,go places where we did not have to worry if they served alcohol or not. He says he is not depressed..He takes prozac twice a day to help with that. He does not attend any meetings and misses his counseling sessions.Is this normal behavior for someone who has quit drinking.? Recently the Dr. told him he had a swollen liver, he goes for an ultrasound in July..Maybe he is sick and I am not being made aware of it? He has me waiting on him hand and foot.he used to love to cook but does not even do that anymore. The spark that was always there,sense of humor ect.gone.
PJ54
PJ54
Hello NovScorp,

It would be difficult to say what is or is not normal behaviour for someone who has stopped drinking but there are some pointers.

Sometimes when a person quits drinking but does not fully deal with the problem of living without alcohol the person can find life difficult and those living with them can find it even more difficult. I know of a case where a spouse told her alcoholic husband to go and drink again because bad as life was when he was drinking, it was worse when he quit. That is one reason why Alcoholics Anonymous recommends that alcoholics should make use of the Twelve Step programme of recovery. Your husband may be finding it difficult to deal with everyday living without the use of alcohol and that is something he could tackle with some help through AA.

I believe that Al-Anon has adapted the AA Twelve Step programme so that it is suitable for family members of alcoholics and maybe that is something for you to check out for yourself. I dont think that you should be waiting hand and foot on any person who is capable of getting off his butt and look after himself so some house rules may be in order.
deleted_user
deleted_user
Many of us (I'm a Vietnam vet also) drank for so many years we didn't have a clue how live sober. It took AA and time for me to learn and find a life that didn't come out of a bottle or can.
Like PJ says, Alanon is your best bet to understand...

Hugs,
Dennis
Community LeaderExJerseyGirl2
ExJerseyGirl2
Lack of energy, no interest even in things that used to interest him, disengagement from activities. From what you say, it sounds like depression. Perhaps the Prozac is not the right answer for him and he needs to revisit his meds and get back into counseling. Liver malfunction can also cause fatigue.
Impermanence
Impermanence
Encourage him to take walks with you.
Community Leaderbobinmaine
bobinmaine
All good replies, I can't add anymore except just want to emphasize the need to revisit the meds. He probably needs to have his depression medication changed. The best one that worked for me is Pristiq. It got rid of those horrible feelings of loss and isolation that I had been self medicating for with the alcohol. Prozac didn't help me much at all, even when the dose was increased.

You need to go with him into the exam room and tell the doctor these things! IMHO

God Bless!
jokiwhau
jokiwhau
Do you have a pet? I know my dogs really help me out of the feelings of depression. It is great to go on walks with them too and get some air and have time to think.

My husband was the same way. He needs to get out and do something - maybe try to find something you two can do together like a movie, date night, walks, or whatever! Good luck!
NovScorp
NovScorp
Thank you all for your responses..It has been a great Help!!
1is2many
1is2many
There is sober and then there is dry. When I quit drinking the first time I was a dry drunk for 2 yrs. I was miserable. Then I drank again. This time I tend to stay busy with making myself work at being better sober.

Just hang in there. It gets better

1is2
deleted_user
deleted_user
I have a simple, yet effective solution if he can get started and stay committed; Excercise and Diet. This may seem like a rediculous solution, but I can assure you if he can muster up the strength to get out in the sun, take a long walk once a day, and eat a healthy diet, many aspects of his life as well as your relationship will behin to change. Good Luck
alitlmorsly
alitlmorsly
Sounds like me, but I'm depressed.
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