Alcoholism Support Group
Alcoholism is the continued consumption of alcoholic beverages, even when it is negatively affecting your health, work, relationships and life. If you think alcohol is causing you to lose control, it's time to seek help. Our group is a safe place to vent, check in, get back up if you fall, and reach sobriety.
Everything has been going pretty well in my battle with alcohol this time around. I've been going to a lot of meetings, I got a sponsor who I talk to everyday and I'm being open and honest with everyone I talk to. Today really sucked though. My stepmom, out of nowhere, asked me how much money I had taken out of their water jug of change/some dollars. I said I didn't know because during my addiction, I did take money and I had admitted that to them awhile ago. We didn't talk about it again until today. She came out of nowhere with this, accusing me of taking "at least $500". Now, I know I did take money and I admitted that to them and have been very honest with my stepmom and dad since I've been living with them again. I simply said "theres no way." I know for a fact that I did not take that much money from them. The most dollar amount on a bill I even saw in there was a $10. I'd say over the amount of time I was taking money, I took at most $100 in CHANGE and small bills. No $100's, no $50s, no $20s. I told her I did not take that amount of money and of course she goes into a chaotic mess telling me that I'm calling her a liar, which I never did. I think she might just be mistaken about where she put the large bills, if she did keep them at all. This happened before when she accussed me of taking her Harley Davidson jacket and I repeatedly told her I didn't and what do you know...my dad had moved it without telling her. Nope, she never said sorry either. I told her before that I will admit to everything I did during my active addiction, but I won't say I did something that I did not do. I'm so upset about this and it's just really putting me back a lot. She's a very negative person, so I try not to pay attention to her side comments, but this was just too much for me. I ended up walking away because she just kept calling me a liar and saying "oh wow you're still going to lie." I don't know if she's trying to make it look like I took that much money or what, but I know I didn't and I really have no way to prove it.
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check out that smoke ring. It tasted really good. I smothered it with Maulls BBQ sauce which is Local to St. Louis and one of the best I ever had.....
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I was recently separated from my wife of 33 years and it's complicated. Anyway I rented a room about 15 minutes away and I see my kids about once a week. I see the people who own the house I live in once in a while but other than that I stay in my room where I do my cooking, wash dishes in the shower, read, color, and sleep. I get out at least once a day. I grocery shop and I attend 2 meetings...
The key is to number one just work to make the wrongs of my past right. The whole thing is not a im right and shes wrong its i was wrong and Im working on being better now. I took money from my parents and I still feel bad about it. They are both dead and I cant repay them.
The way to fix this is to make the stolen money back and repay the loan...
Also dont use this as a excuse to fail. That is what the disease wants. You to get mad and show her by using. Not an acceptable thing to do. The real issue is that inside you know that you are trying to do right and she just doesnt trust you. She may also have other issues with life and is using this as a chance to blow off steam. The key is to live a better way and make those wrongs right. You can do this
1is2many
Although you are upset with what happened today, if you look at the big picture, everything is still going quite well.
You did the right thing in walking away and not arguing because confrontation would achieve nothing. There are a couple of valuable things that you can learn from this experience and it could help to greatly strengthen your sobriety.
The first lesson to observe is that the world is full of people who are in some ways spiritually sick, your stepmom being a prime example. You would try to treat sick people with kindness and consideration and that is what you have done in this case so that is a big move forward for you. For your own peace of mind, it is better to avoid argument, even when you are right and to also disregard the other person’s faults.
You have also done the right thing in being honest about taking the money. It would probably be impossible to estimate the true amount at this time so maybe you will have to compromise a little, again for your own peace of mind. Even though you think it was less than the amount that your stepmom is saying, neither of you can really be sure. In that situation, would it be worthwhile for you to give her the $500, maybe in instalments when you can afford it.
Taking this type of action is a humbling experience and it does not come naturally. It takes a big person to rise above the pettiness and do the right things when it is more natural to fight back and defend yourself. Therefore, as I see it, you are doing very well indeed.
God Bless
If she believes it's $500, repay her $500 over time even if you know it's wrong.
In time you'll get that repaid in many ways and your father will respect you. Your step mom may respect you.
Keep going to meetings.
Keep doing the right things so God can provide an opportunity for you to get away from that woman. It would be nice if she would have been more supportive and understood, and we are so sick when drinking we forget. I think it is worth mentioning anyone who leaves their money out in the open when an alcoholic is around is just as much in fault of their money being stolen.
If she would have put the money in a bank, it wouldn't have been an issue.
No matter who you are, 500 dollars isn't that much money, you can pay her 20 dollars a week for half a year and it will be settled, sounds like she has unresolved anger at you still, and that will happen as you continue in your sobriety.
Your job is to do all you can to not let the situation fester into a bigger deal than it is, so I suggest you find a way to pay her 20 dollars a week for 6 months, and then to add some insurance to it, pay her 10 dollars a month for the following 6 months. This will show her you are serious about not being a taker anymore in your life and that you are now living a life where giving is more important.