Abstinence & Celibacy Support Group
The pressures of sex from peers, the media and culture can be overwhelming, but you are in total control of your body and celibacy is a choice that many are making. Find sanctuary with people who are choosing to abstain without fear of judgment.
Hi I'm a man I want to remain celibate until I find a meaningful relationship and if I never do then I don't want to have sex ever again, honestly. I hooked up a few days ago and not only do I believe that it's immoral the sex is bad sex and it left me feeling worthless, guilty and ashamed. Has anyone else gone through this? These women have been the ones to ask me for sex but I blame myself as I said yes.
I think society pushes sex on us and outside of a meaningful relationship it's mistake. I guess I get frustrated I'm in my early 40s but hooking up is not the answer.
I doubt the woman got pregnant she was 47 but if she did I don't believe in abortion and I'll be with her and raise the child, but I've looked at statistics on that the chance of that happening is low very low, much less than 5% I'd say from internet resources. I know at least I should have used a condom I don't need to be beat up for that. I've been for std testing in the past and it was all negative before I do promise I will go again.
I just want to stay celibate and if I choose to get into relationships I want them to be celibate for a very long time. I'm fully prepared to stay celibate for life, I've only hooked up twice but I hope after hooking up a second time ( the last time was 2 years ago) I have finally learnt my lesson.
Maybe I need a spiritual religious conversion. If anyone can help support me and suggest resources I'd very much appreciate it. I deleted dating apps those are toxic and anyone in my state of mind I suggest you do the same. I could use an adult filter for my phone and notebook I believe watching pornographic videos have lead me down this path too.
I'm just feeling down in the dumps and don't feel comfortable talking with friends or family on this I need your support from this community.
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I don't really know how to label this but I having a rough week and I can't say it's one thing.... I have a lot on my plate which is nothing new and I try to cope in many positive ways and do but I still have my moments.My kids more so my daughters talk to me about everything which I know it's cause of comfort and we are close.... however I really struggle with the venting about their dad which...
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I did the dumbest thing today. I charged my earbuds, unplugged the block and put the block in my little bag instead of the earbuds. I wasn't happy about that when I got to the gym. What a dummy!
I didn't choose celibacy but the scar tissue which forced it upon both my husband I was inflicted by child prostitution and the hyper-sexuality I suffered as a result of all that sexual abuse. Girl howdy, I have worked through ALLOT of the psychobaggage and moral conflicts of which you speak. I thank God daily for the husband --even on the days I don't much like either God nor my husband-- who showed me the all important diffs between sex as a loving expression and porno sex. I am in absolute agreement with you that porno sex is just plain bad sex, however well glamourized.
I don't know about religious conversion, but spiritual guidance through Catholic priests gave me quite allot of insights to the male perspective in all the chaos. I did take my Catholic vows at the age of 45, but in the decades leading up to that decision, the clergy was unfailingly generous with their spiritual counsel without ever once pressuring me to convert. Ditto for the facilitators and attendees of the workshops and support groups I attended within their communities.
Unfortunately, support from this particular forum is almost non-existent but DS is a big site with allot of other forums.
Thank you for your courage in making this post. I dream that one day this conversation can flow as easily as conversations about "The World's Sexiest Whatevers," but until then, I break the weirds of it all into smaller components and take whatever support I can find, wherever I find it. I hope you'll take the time to surf some of the more active forums here on DS. Ya never know what tree the nut you need will fall out of.
Only by the grace of God am I alive, clean, and safe. I dont know what is in store for me down the road, I dont know my purpose, destiny or reason for still being here, but I am here and I have to be patient for God to reveal it to me.
The first few months of sobriety I went through withdrawal bad. Its gotten better but there are days I am majorly depressed.
So you might look into a local SA group, start a daily journal. read the bible to pass time. I still am not comfortable with people touching me, thank goodness for covid....