BahamaSun
Status: Cancer sucks! Please go away!
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- "People who consider themselves victims of their circumstances will always remain victims unless they develop a greater vision for their lives."~Stedman Graham~
- A husband asks: "Why do you weep and snuffle over a TV program and the imaginary sadness of people you have never met?"Wife: "For the same reason you scream and yell when a man you don’t know makes a touchdown."
- I Want to Kill My HusbandA lady walks into the drug store and asks the druggist for some arsenic.The druggist asks "Ma'am, what do you want with arsenic?".The lady replies "I want to kill my husband.""I can't sell you any for that reason" says the...
- Crafty MomJohn invited his mother over for dinner one evening. During the meal, she couldn't help but notice how attractive his roommate Judy was.She had been suspicious of a relationship between her son and his roommate for quite some time, but...
- Love Thy HusbandA woman accompanied her husband to the doctor's office. After his checkup, he doctor called the wife into his office alone.He said, "Your husband is suffering from a very severe disease, combined with horrible stress. If you don't do...
- Slide Under The TableA man and a woman were having dinner in a fine restaurant. Their waitress, taking another order at a table a few paces away noticed that the man was slowly sliding down his chair and under the table, with the woman acting...
- Male AssertivenessA mild-mannered man was tired of being bossed around by his wife so he went to a psychiatrist.The psychiatrist said he needed to build his self-esteem, and so gave him a book on assertiveness, which he read on the way home.He had...
- Pub StakeoutThe policeman had the bar under surveillance a few minutes before closing time, so he could see who comes out drunk.The first one out the door at 2:00 o'clock weaved down the sidewalk, then fell on the curb. Sluggishly got up, then tried...
- "It is not work that kills men, it is worry. Work is healthy; you can hardly put more on a man than he can bear. But worry is rust upon the blade. It is not movement that destroys the machinery, but friction." ~ Henry Ward Beecher
- Stay over one nightA hindu priest, rabbi and a lawyer were driving down the road, when the car breaks down. Fortunately finding a farmhouse nearby, the farmer informed them that he had only one spare room, and that it had only two twin beds.They...
- Murphy Laws For Frequent Flyers 1. No flight ever leaves on time unless you are running late and need the delay to make the flight. 2. If you are running late for a flight, it will depart from the farthest gate within the terminal. 3. If you...
- EAGLES IN A STORM Did you know that an eagle knows when a storm is approaching long before it breaks? The eagle will fly to some high spot and wait for the winds to come. When the storm hits, it sets its wings so that the wind will pick it up and...
- "The purpose of life is to live it, to taste experience to the utmost, to reach out eagerly and without fear for newer and richer experience." ~ Eleanor RooseveltUS diplomat & reformer (1884 - 1962)
- Having lost most of his hearing a number of years ago, this elderly man goes to the doctor to be fitted with hearing aids which promise to allow him to hear 100%. A month later, he returns to the doctor for a check up on his progress. The doctor...
- After being married 25 years, a man looked at his wife one day and said, "You know, 25 years ago we lived in a cheap apartment, drove a cheap car, had only a sofa bed and watched a 14" black and white television. BUT, every night I got to sleep with...