Update
So I had my surgery on 9/2, the lumpectomy and all is well and labs are good. So grateful! Larry and Summer finished getting their things out of my house on Sunday. I'm starting to feel calmer but sad sad. I am not having contact with her now. I have to have peace with myself and I can't handle the ups and downs of addiction. I'm not saying never but self preservation is strong and I've been through similar circumstances with her and ive spent a lot of money this last year after Justin's death trying to help her.
But I have to tell y'all about an unusual sign from Justin. After what happened with Summer and Larry on Tuesday night and my surgery on Friday, I spent Labor Day weekend just laying around and relaxing. On Monday I was sitting on my deck on my iPad looking up a website and trying to search something on the website. Up in the left hand corner of the website there was a search window and everything seemed to freeze up, I kept typing in Birmingham in this search window and all of a sudden an email that I had written about Justin starts running in this window! This email describes an extraordinary experience I had with Justin back last August 2015 7 weeks after his death. I wrote this email, I've read it many times and there it was running in a search window for Air B and B. Go figure! I didn't know what to make of it. How in the world? But the more I've thought about about it, I think Justin was letting me know that he was still here for me in light of all that had been going on. I have had many signs from him in the week prior to the incident with Larry and Summer mostly finding dimes and quarters which is one of his signs I recognize. So this helps of course but life is bittersweet right now. Thanks for being here for me SOTH. I will be posting that email I was telling you about soon
Replies
Oh, that was Justin...that was definitely Justin. He was spiritually yelling at you to get your attention and let you now he was there. What a blessing at a time when you so badly needed it. I am sorry about the difficulties with your daughter but it sounds like you don't have to feel you are fighting it alone. Good for you!!!
I am so relieved to hear that the surgery went well. I can almost feel the tension leaving you....and we all k now that is so good...glad to hear you are able to regroup and distance yourself from the ugly and hurtful enemy of addiction...I hate that Summer suffers with this. Addiction is a hideous disease. I love your sign from Justin, and firmly believe that he was for sure getting your attention and sense that he is please that you are able to de-esculate...Will miss you at the retreat, but so understand your needs. Gentle care, Ann
Great news for you surgery. You have Justin with you always. Sending you vibes of peace and healing, sister. Be Well!!!!
What a wonderful wink from Justin. And I too agree...he is reminding you he is right there with you. I am pulling for Summer...but I am so proud of you for taking care of YOU! Love you!
Thank goodness your results are favorable after your surgery and that you are taking care of yourself. I have no doubt Justin is with you and when these signs come that literally make us pause and think, "Wow!" they can hold us over for a very long time I have found.
Your love is a constant with Summer and she knows this. May she find a way to love herself again as much as you love her to find her way back to her healthy essence. In the meantime you are doing the only thing you can by creating boundaries. They are bridges and not walls and in time I hope that she can cross the bridge into healing and well-being. Oh, how I understand the path you are on and I'm with you! Please feel it!
Loving care your way and grateful for your sharing of how you are doing and feeling. YOU matter!
XO Joanie